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That requires much stronger forces. A tool is a technique or procedure that can generate a force that allows you to do the work of change. It is work that must be done in real time. When do we use a tool? In the present.
Conventional therapy tends to be passive and focuses on the past. It excavates a patient’s history, usually from childhood, brings it into the light of day and interprets it so as to strip it of its unconscious power. I have the greatest respect for the past. Memories, emotions, insights can all be very valuable. But my patients needed help and relief in the present and all the insights in the world weren’t going to be powerful enough to deliver that.
To control your actions you need something else: a specific procedure you can use systematically to combat a specific problem -- you need a tool.
There’s an obvious objection that arises here: Isn’t what you’re doing superficial? Sure, these tools of yours may help a patient change his or her behavior but you haven’t addressed the underlying reasons. Unless you do that they’re bound to go back to their (self-) destructive ways sooner or later.
There are two answers to this objection. The first involves a misunderstanding of how people change. Insight into the “reasons” for a problem isn’t the cause of change – it’s the result. Groups like Alcoholics Anonymous have always known this. You don’t join AA and then sit around discussing why you drink too much over a few beers or vodka martinis. You join to stop drinking one day at a time. Only after that can you look into the roots of your addiction by “taking inventory.”
The second answer goes back to our original question about what a tool is. There has been a bias in psychotherapy implying that anything that is active and involves your will is superficial; as if the deepest part of human experience can only occur inside your head. The truth is the opposite; the deepest part of human experience happens when you interact with the world outside yourself. That means you need to go beyond thinking and into “doing”—and this is exactly what a tool makes possible.--This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
Smart and practical. Just enough philosophical ideas to identify with and then very distinct and clear tools to use to overcome many common thought patterns.Published 10 days ago by Nathan Faudree
I am an avid book reader and not many books make it to 'in case of emergency (ICE)' list, that is, if I were to run out of the home with my important documents and few books, the... Read morePublished 1 month ago by Rama Krishna Reddy
I found this book by chance. I discovered it was not by chance at all. I am grateful the book found me and I am in the process of re-reading it to apply the wisdom of this message... Read morePublished 1 month ago by Amazon Customer
Brilliant. Excellent tools that work well and are easy to apply. This is a book I will keep as a good reference, rather than just a book I'll read once and never look again.Published 1 month ago by David Salih
An Important Book! Thank you to the author who developed these tools. If you are hesitating in buying this item...don't hesitate any longer!Published 1 month ago by Dinomania
I feel this book is truly life changing and it meant as a manual for life more than a one time read. I have recommend this book to numerous people and plan on recommending it.Published 2 months ago by Going to the top
a comfortable reconfiguration of a half century of self help literaturePublished 3 months ago by Jack E Reed