Gender, too, is always on Coontz's mind. In the third chapter ("My Mother Was a Saint"), she offers an analysis of the contradictions and chasms inherent in the "traditional" division of labor. She reveals, next, how rarely the family exhibited economic and emotional self-reliance, suggesting that the shift from community to nuclear family was not healthy. Coontz combines a clear prose style with bold assertions, backed up by an astonishing fleet of researched, myth-skewing facts. The 88 pages of endnotes dramatize both her commitment to and deep knowledge of the subject. Brilliant, beautifully organized, iconoclastic, and (relentlessly) informative The Way We Never Were breathes fresh air into a too often suffocatingly "hot" and agenda-sullied subject. In the penultimate chapter, for example, a crisp reframing of the myth of black-family collapse leads to a reinterpretation of the "family crisis" in general, putting it in the larger context of social, economic, and political ills.
The book began in response to the urgent questions about the family crisis posed her by nonacademic audiences. Attempting neither to defend "tradition" in the era of family collapse, nor to liberate society from its constraints, Coontz instead cuts through the kind of sentimental, ahistorical thinking that has created unrealistic expectations of the ideal family. "I show how these myths distort the diverse experiences of other groups in America," Coontz writes, "and argue that they don't even describe most white, middle-class families accurately." The bold truth of history after all is that "there is no one family form that has ever protected people from poverty or social disruption, and no traditional arrangement that provides a workable model for how we might organize family relations in the modern world."
Some of America's most precious myths are not only precarious, but down right perverted, and we would be fools to ignore Stephanie Coontz's clarion call. --Hollis Giammatteo
The title should be "The Way we Were." She describes (albeit with a rather left wing perspective) the first half of the 20th century much in accord with my Grandfather's... Read morePublished 1 day ago by Erik
Lucy and Desi Arnaz cheated on each other. Lauren Chapin (of Father Knows Best) was raped by her father. Read morePublished 6 days ago by B. Wolinsky
The author meanders about a lot of unrelated topics. States some positions that are not backed by facts. While obviously intelligent the author is hard to read.Published 8 days ago by Howard S. Spokane
My book group chose this title thinking it might lead to some animated discussion. For the first time in our history not one member finished the whole book. Read morePublished 4 months ago by CaroBee
Completely biased. Too much opinion, not enough fact. Obviously a left wing man-hater, looking for the government to take on the role of sugar daddy. Waste of my time and money.Published 5 months ago by Andrea L. Aicher
I could't imaging why college history teacher chose this book to read it for students?! Full of bias, arguments that doesn't make sens, contradicting facts and manipulated... Read morePublished 6 months ago by Pawel
Mrs. Coontz has done it again with this book. She starts out dispelling the dream world that is "the traditional family" and doesn't let up until the very end.Published 7 months ago by Wesley Hargis
Ms Coontz is well known in the field of gender studies. SHe is a prolific author. In THE WAY WE NEVER WERE she slices through myths and stories many people have lived with as... Read morePublished 7 months ago by Peter M. Herford
This compelling book is heavily peppered with cited examples and research-based evidence that shatters the notion of a perfect or classic American lifestyle, especially that... Read morePublished 8 months ago by DrDoc