Things Better Than Boobs [Paperback]

Theodore Rasbury (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 11, 2009

Things Better than BOOBS is creative, suspenseful, sarcastic, and laughter provoking all at once. It's hilarious and clever take-home message campaigns loudly for an agreeably timeless yet generally unspoken notion. It is a brilliant gift idea for any humorous occasion and a must have on any book shelf or coffee table where sarcasm meets intellectual wit.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

At an early age Rasbury became widely recognized as the informal leader of Person's with Influence (PWI), an indigenous and sought after societal group both intimidating and selective in its recruitment of members. Practicing a form of ancient sophistry, they offered general knowledge and unspoken services in exchange for money and gifts. Sophistry was intensely popular in pre-socratic times but lost momentum until Rasbury rekindled its' fundamental principles. Dubbed as PWI's ringleader, horse whispers around town say Rasbury was Marlon Brando's inspiration for the Godfather character. Rasbury's major money-maker came after he started I'll Eat You, Inc., a company focused on crafting personalized chocolate pops. After Rasbury split from PWI, he fell in love with a botanist named Kitten, only to have his best old x-friend Ray pilfer and marry her. But knowing Kitten's exact dimensions, and to infuriate Ray, Rasbury crafted delicous chocolate "Kitten Pops," distributing them nationally with this slogan: "Have your way with Kitten, my x-friends wife, she's delicous!" Shortly thereafter, I'll Eat You, Inc. took off like a jitterbug, creating and distributing chocolate molds for over 3,500 people daily. On the side, Rasbury is also a free-lance writer, motivational speaker, and inventor of the rare color dunebuggy brown. He also owns the chain Nip N' Cuts, a topless barber shop that exceeds over $1 billion in annual sales. Some argue that sales of Nip N' Cuts would be greater if Rasbury didn't air-condition each location. But Rasbury sticks to his maxim: "the colder the shop, the more magical the experience." Rasbury will soon be launching another highly anticipated product, Erotic GPS: "Sexed Up Navigation for those who cum and go." Rasbury's recent case study showed that the market for a dirty-talkin' GPS is bigger than the directional voice will make you. For more information, visit TheodoreRasbury.com.

Product Details

• Paperback: 128 pages
• Publisher: AuthorHouse (May 11, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1438967225
• ISBN-13: 978-1438967226
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,227,536 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

25 of 33 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Great read!, September 7, 2010

By 

Adam - See all my reviews

This review is from: Things Better Than Boobs (Paperback)

Amazing book. Too bad it took no time to read since there are zero pages.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars Seriously!, August 16, 2011

By 

Vonilyn "Yvonne" (Port Orchard,WA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Things Better Than Boobs (Paperback)

This is a completely blank book. I get it....."nothing is better than boobs", but seriously. The other reviews are just nonsense. It has nothing in it, blank pages for over $10.00! If you need a gag gift then this could be for you, but if you actually expect something with words or pictures look elsewhere.

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars family gifts, January 2, 2011

By 

Terenzu 4 America (Nor Cal) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Things Better Than Boobs (Paperback)

Things Better Than Boobs. That is the title of this little jewel of parody. As seen at a bookstore and given at Christmas; this boldly written title and the picture on the cover implies the most licentious possibilites from the imagination. As a "conversation piece" on a coffee table or pominent on a bookshelf this author's artistry for casting webs of thought, a book like none other. This book is always discussed warmly and with passion.