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  • Canned Unicorn Meat
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Canned Unicorn Meat

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List Price: $16.99
Price: $12.29 & FREE Shipping on orders over $35. Details
You Save: $4.70 (28%)
In Stock.
Sold by Kitchen And Beyond and Fulfilled by Amazon. Gift-wrap available.
  • Okay, for real: you can't eat this. It's a dismembered stuffed unicorn in a can.
  • The bottom of the tin is easily removable to gain access to the mini dead unicorn inside. No can opener needed!
28 new from $11.09

Frequently Bought Together

Canned Unicorn Meat + Canned Dragon Meat + Harcos Labs Zombie Jerky Teriyaki
Price for all three: $34.27

These items are shipped from and sold by different sellers.

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Product Details

  • Product Dimensions: 4 x 3.6 x 2.7 inches ; 4 ounces
  • Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • ASIN: B004CRYE2C
  • Manufacturer recommended age: 16 years and up
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,627 in Toys & Games (See Top 100 in Toys & Games)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (345 customer reviews)
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Product Description

No foolin' - Unicorn meat is real! Excellent source of sparkles! Rick BiteUnicorns, as we all know, frolic all over the world, pooping rainbows and marshmallows wherever they go. We are confident you will find a world of bewilderment in every mouthful of scrumptious unicorn meat. Unfortunately, due to restrictions on the importation of mythical processed meatstuff, we are unable to bring you Canned Unicorn Meat in the way the Sisters of Radiant Farms intended. When you open your can, you will find one tiny unicorn which has been appropriately sliced into its main cuts of meat. Simply use your Growth Ray to re-embiggen the unicorn before skinning it and processing its flesh. Or if you're lazy, just bring it to your local Mad Scientist-Butcher. He'll know what to do.

Customer Questions & Answers

Customer Reviews

Great gag gift!
GiaMarie
Please do not consume this product.
Brian Tanti
I mean, it's unicorn meat in a can.
Ken

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

1,722 of 1,750 people found the following review helpful By Irma Gerd on May 10, 2013
Do NOT eat too much of this stuff at once. I had the rainbow runs for a week. The entire complex smelled like hopes and dreams.
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5,270 of 5,379 people found the following review helpful By George Takei on July 9, 2013
When my shipment of unicorn meat from RADIANT FARMS finally arrived, I prepared the fragrant pate as a maki roll, wrapped in seaweed and spread over some sushi rice, with a little unagi sauce on top. This had been a staple during WWII when spam was standard issue in Hawaii, and it was how my cousins used to prepare it. Ah, the memories. I even had a half carafe of cold, unfiltered sake to pair with it.

Unfortunately, I found this unicorn meat brand to be quite similar to spam, both in texture and blandness. I'd been hoping for that zestier kick that comes from the rump cuts of other mythical and fantastical creatures, such as griffins or centaurs (for the latter, serve only the back half of the creature with guests, or it gets awkward).

Apparently, as Dateline recently reported, "farmed" unicorns are force-fed mostly genetically modified grains, rather than their natural diet of skittles and ecstasy pills. California in fact is ready to ban the practice and sale of such meat by referendum. Moreover, certain European countries were caught mixing in regular horse meat (yes, disgusting) so you never really know how pure the unicorn is.

I say stick with fresh. I highly recommend TOM RIDDLE brand unicorn steaks, which arrive still oozing restorative blood. Ground into patties, they make a great burger.
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916 of 977 people found the following review helpful By "Halo" on June 18, 2011
Of course this isn't as good as fresh, but who has time to hunt unicorns these days?

I'm a busy professional so I don't have the luxury of just grabbing my bow and quiver and spending days in the high glens hunting fresh 'corn. This product allows me to come home from a hectic day and enjoy a meal packed with that special nutrition only unicorn can provide. I even keep a few cans at the office for those late nights.

But seriously, this is a great, funny and 'tasteful' gag gift. We received ours from a relative last Christmas and as it was unwrapped everyone burst out in laughter when we saw what it was. The unicorn meat comes in a Spam-shaped can, complete with funny but realistic product information on the side labels.

This gift was enjoyable enough as it was, but then my wife pointed out that the can lid can be pried off to reveal plush unicorn 'parts' inside. Very clever and a great deal of fun for the price. I'm going to be giving a few out to co-workers this Christmas.

One last note: I don't think this gift would be appropriate for small children due to the small stuffed parts as they might be a choking hazard.
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141 of 148 people found the following review helpful By mark e on June 13, 2013
I was pleasantly surprised by the unicorn meat, even though canned. it is more tender than the centaur i've had, and far less stringy than faun.

my only concern is that after feeding it to my infant son, his diaper was filled with skittles.
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1,404 of 1,536 people found the following review helpful By V. Zhirinovsky on April 21, 2012
Don't order this product if you have a conscience. The unicorns in the industrial unicorn farms live in appalling conditions, in many cases worse than those of the pegasus ranches. Don't believe the propaganda of Lisa Frank and the other tycoons of big unicorn; all that awaits these poor creatures is the abattoir and the rainbow factory. Be ethical and buy (kosher) dragon meat instead.
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202 of 223 people found the following review helpful By Jennifer Borges on July 9, 2013
The installation instructions were totally wrong.
I ended up with pieces of unicorn all over the place and my nose caught in the DVD player.
Again.
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285 of 317 people found the following review helpful By Rich Meyer on June 20, 2012
I must say that the inspection process at the unicorn canning facility leaves a LOT to be desired. When I received my can of Radiant Farms Unicorn Meat, instead of finding salivatingly tasty unicorn morsels, when I opened the can, something that looked amazingly like a small gnome dropped out onto my plate. At least I think it is a gnome. It might be a Smurf, since it looks blue, but it may have asphyxiated in the can. This completely ruined my son's unicorn-themed birthday party, since neither I nor my husband had the time to go out and find a virgin to lure a real unicorn into the van. Very disappointed!
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438 of 494 people found the following review helpful By Silence on January 4, 2011
Verified Purchase
This is more of an explanation to why I rated this the way I did. How fun is it? Extremely fun if you get it for your mother who happens to be a Unicorn fanatic and then make her open the present for the first time in front of the entire family. Educational value is more for the reciever, if the reciever once gave you Neil Diamond albums for christmas when you were 16 and you were expecting something that sucked much less. Durability is also at the hands of the reciever, especially when the Unicorn fanatical of a mum wants to throw it at your head. Overall this toy brought everyone in my family a great teary eyed moment of ROFL. Thank you Think Geek, for giving me the best revenge tool money can buy!
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