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If This is a Gift, Can I Send it Back?: Surviving in the Land of the Gifted and Twice Exceptional Paperback – August 2, 2012


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 80 pages
  • Publisher: GHF Press (August 2, 2012)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0615648789
  • ISBN-13: 978-0615648781
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 5 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #435,931 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Jen Merrill is a Chicago-based blogger and writer, having recently returned to her Windy City hometown after 14 years in Denver. A musician by training and a writer by choice, when she has something to say, Jen says it at her blog, Laughing at Chaos (www.laughingatchaos.com).

Customer Reviews

The combination of honesty and humor balances well together.
Exceptional Kids
They think that somehow these kids will magically skip over all the regular childhood frustrations, choosing to study or do homework over anything else.
Mona
Buy this book because you've read all of the books out there on gifted/2E and you need commiseration.
Sharon

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on August 23, 2012
Format: Paperback
If you are the parent of a twice-exceptional child, you know that most days are not funny. They are often filled with tears, fights and remorse. Life often devolves into unhappiness and a drum beat of "Where did I go wrong?" You blame yourself, your child, your child's teacher, your shrink ... or just about anybody else who may have looked at you wrong.
For parents of 2ekids - gifted and LD - getting up in the morning can be a struggle. You are continually looking for `the' magical answer; the one thing you can do to make your child normal. The day finally comes when you realize that there is no easy solution. And then you cry.
That is why I want to highly recommend this book to anyone who deals with twice-exceptional children. The tears won't stop ... they'll just turn into tears from laughing so hard and the sheer joy of knowing you aren't alone. You see, Jen Merrill will make you laugh and laugh and laugh.
Jen's dry sense of humor and ability to lighten up the conversation will have you wanting more. She gives down-to-earth advice and draws you in with her empathetic wit. Not everyone will take the same path that Jen did as they travel life's journey as the parent of a twice-exceptional gifted child, but finally there is a guide to help you find your way.
Buy the book. You know you want to and now you don't have a good reason not to buy it. Isn't it time you cried some tears of joy! And I'll bet that after you read If This is a Gift, Can I Send it Back?, you will be holding your child in your arms ... and smiling.
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By BeckyG on August 17, 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I started to highlight the parts that really resonated with me, but after underlining page after page, I realized that I might as well give up because I needed the entire book. Her collections of ideas are particularly awesome and funny; some of her lists include:
*what I wish the world knew about parenting 2e kids
*some things to keep in mind
*how to make a difficult decision in 100 steps
*what gifted is/isn't
*what is said/meant
*how to lose your everlovin' mind in five easy steps
*ten reasons not to strangle your gifted child
*I love/hate homeschooling my son
*"Dear Teacher" letters.
I laughed so hard that I almost woke up my husband in the next room over. There is so much truth here, and encouragement, for those of us living in the 2e world.
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Christine Fonseca on August 5, 2012
Format: Paperback
Jen Merrill hits it out of the park with If This Is A Gift, Can I Send It Back, her personal experiences in raising gifted children. Written with a sense of humor guaranteed to make parents laugh out loud, Merrill openly talks about the good, the bad, and the stressful aspects of parenting twice-exceptional children. Using lists, letters to teachers, and real world anecdotes, Merrill says what every parent of an exceptional child has thought and/or felt, but not had the guts to say aloud. Not a book of strategies or theory, If This Is A Gift is the companion book parents need as they venture down the road of parenting a group of children often misunderstood by mainstream education and mental health professions, providing the support and understanding families have been screaming for. A clear must-have in any Gifted Education library.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Mona on September 3, 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
People think that raising a gifted child should be easy. They think that somehow these kids will magically skip over all the regular childhood frustrations, choosing to study or do homework over anything else. They think "gifted" means highly-driven, hardworking prodigies.

But they aren't all like that. This book nails it - NAILS IT - what it's like to raise a gifted and 2e child. With her biting wit, Merrill has shared parts of her story in a way that will make you laugh until your sides hurt and cry on the same page.

My copy is kept by my front door with the requirement that anyone who walks in the door read it (it's a fast read). I've sent copies to extended family members. If my child was in school I would take copies to his teachers and the administrators at his school (I, like the author, have had to jump into homeschooling because regular school couldn't keep up).

Buy it. Read it. Laugh, cry, and know that you aren't alone.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Lenore Ealy on February 8, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This, too, is life and can be life lived abundantly! Jen Merrill offers the parents of kids who are "gifted" and "twice exceptional"--gifted on the one hand but with some strange quirks and difficult challenges in cognitive processing on the other--a glimpse of how to navigate a world that still depends on social institutions built to serve bureaucratic administration and social control more than people. With humor and insight, Merrill dispenses with the clinical approach (often the cover professionals adopt when they just don't really know a lot) and pulls back the curtain on her own experiences as a parent. For those of us walking in similar shoes, the advice to grab a glass of wine and relax into the process of getting to know the particular kid(s) you have is a breath of fresh air... and it offers hope.

Filled with little gems through which the reader has flashes of recognition and finds comfort to know that he or she is not alone out here, this is one of my favorites:

"the [school] district's GT program is more for high-achievers, and not exactly for gifted students. Gifted students can be high-achievers, but not all high-achievers are truly gifted. I swear I'll say it until my lungs hurt, but gifted is wiring. Parents who desperately want gifted kids really want high-achieving kids, because if they truly had gifted kids with the (hmm, what descriptor shall I use?) interesting wiring, they'd be rocking under their desks, quivering like the rest of us. It ain't all sunshine and roses, folks. Some days make me want to stab a rainbow."

Merrill gives voice to many of this reviewers own frustrations as she describes her family's journey from institutional schooling to homeschooling.
Read more ›
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