This Thing Called Grief: New Understandings of Loss [Paperback]

Thomas M. Ellis (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 1, 2006

Grief is a crazy-making, complicated process, a struggle to acknowledge the life-changing impact of loss. It affects every dimension of the self; it is despairing, isolating, and overwhelming. It is depriving, mischievous, and keeps you unbalanced. Grief is so personally unique and ever changing that getting your hands around it once and for all seems impossible. Someone or something is gone, and you are left broken, empty, and afraid. This Thing Called Grief shows that although grief and pain may be changing you now, they have the potential to transform your life in a healing way. Ellis uses many real-life narratives of loss from his therapy practice to help illustrate various ways of grieving, and shows how you can learn from the experience of loss and make your way towards a place of healing transitions and a renewed sense of life.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Thomas M. Ellis is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, clinical supervisor and executive director of the Center for Grief, Loss, and Transition, based in Saint Paul, Minnesota. He is a second-generation funeral director who lived and worked in a small-town funeral home. The author lives in Hastings, Minnesota, with his wife and two daughters.

Product Details

• Paperback: 132 pages
• Publisher: Syren Book Company; 1 edition (June 1, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0929636643
• ISBN-13: 978-0929636641
• Product Dimensions: 6.8 x 6.3 x 0.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #853,574 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Unique portrait of grief, November 9, 2006

By 

Armchair Interviews (Minneapolis, MN) - See all my reviews

This review is from: This Thing Called Grief: New Understandings of Loss (Paperback)

Subtitled: New Understandings of Loss

Striking a tone that is neither clinical nor maudlin, author Tom Ellis does a good job of explaining grief in his book, This Thing Called Grief. With factual information about the grieving process, poetry and some personal examples of individuals and families taking this journey, Ellis draws the reader in without bringing them down.

As a grief counselor myself, I know that when people are deep in the grieving process they are highly sensitive. Using this awareness Ellis has fashioned a book that sketches individual profiles without resorting to graphic descriptions that might be painful to readers.

With one of the main components of grief being an inability to concentrate for extended periods, Ellis has also shown his sensitivity to readers by writing a book less than one hundred pages long. The author gives enough information to be helpful without giving so much that it feels either overwhelming or discouraging. While the book in itself is short, Ellis has compiled an amazingly comprehensive list of resources for the reader that includes many books not only addressing grief and loss, but trauma and miscarriage, as well as books for children dealing with these same issues.

However, two factors set this book apart. The first is that while many books see grief as a burdensome part of life meant to be endured, This Thing Called Grief paints a portrait of grief that includes coming out on the other side of grief and being transformed and healed by the process. Although hope is in scarce supply during periods of grief, Ellis presents this view so gently it's bound to be gratefully received by many readers.

The second factor is that this book gives the reader permission to feel what they feel no matter what loss they are suffering. In our American culture, where you bury your father on Tuesday and are expected to be back at work and over it on Wednesday, this message is good news indeed.

Armchair Interviews says: A good book to give to someone grieving, even if you just gift yourself.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Souce of Support for Anyone Who Is Grieving, January 14, 2007

By 

Natalina - See all my reviews

This review is from: This Thing Called Grief: New Understandings of Loss (Paperback)

I work in the counseling field and one of my areas of specialization is grief, loss and bereavement for people dealing with death of humans or animals and so many other kinds of losses we all deal with on a daily basis. I have read many books in the area of grief and loss, attended many conferences and taken many courses. This book is one of the best I have ever read! It is comprehensive and compassionate, simply yet eloquently written. It is easily read in one sitting, yet covers all of the important areas that come up for people going through the grieving process. It is an important book to read for anyone dealing with loss, whether the loss is brand new or years old. Kudos to the author! I HIGHLY recommend this book.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The transformation qualities of successful grieving can heal our sense of loss, January 6, 2007

By 

Midwest Book Review (Oregon, WI USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: This Thing Called Grief: New Understandings of Loss (Paperback)

Grief is the emotional response to loss. It is a complicated emotion that is necessary to work through in order to regain emotional equilibrium. Ignored and undealt with, grieve can lead to crippling isolation, overwhelming despair, the deprivation of the soul, mental illness and even death. Based in Saint Paul, Minnesota, Thomas Ellis is a licensed marriage and family therapist, clinical supervisor and executive director of the Center for Grief, Loss & Transition. Ellis draws upon is years of experience and professional expertise to explain just what grief is, how it works, and the role of the grieving process in healing us. Illustrated with stories of real men and women making this an ideal and instructive guide recommended for non-specialist readers having to cope with the loss of a loved one in their own lives, "This Thing Called Grief" shows how the transformation qualities of successful grieving can heal our sense of loss and enable us to cope with even the most tragic of events.