This Year I Will...: How to Finally Change a Habit, Keep a Resolution, or Make a Dream Come True [Hardcover]

M.J. Ryan (Author)

Book Description

Release date: December 26, 2006

Are you really ready to change? Take this quiz and find out.


Every New Year’s Day, my list of resolutions is:
Ambitious. I aim for everything from losing weight to saving more money for my retirement.
Realistic. I just try to bump my good behavior up a notch--be a better friend, give more money to charity---without giving myself any strict deadlines or goals.
Precise. I decide exactly how many men I will ask for a date, or how many new jobs I will apply for.

Whenever I decide to change something, it’s usually because:
My doctor has put the fear of God into me.
I read a magazine article about why making this change is important.
I start daydreaming about how great life will be after I make the change.

True or False: When you want to make a big change in your life, timing is crucial.

Failure is:
Impossible.
Inevitable.
Not in my vocabulary.

(The answers are on the inside back flap.)

Learn the secret to making changes that stick

Every so often people get inspired (again!) to lose weight, get organized, start saving, or stop worrying –but a few months later they give up, frustrated. It doesn’t have to be that way. In This Year I Wil . . .l, bestselling author M.J. Ryan offers breakthrough wisdom and coaching to help readers make this time the time that change becomes permanent.

Why do people find it so hard to change? The secret is that everyone has their own formula for making changes that stick, but most people don’t know what theirs is. They think there is one way to lose five pounds, and another way to stay on top of their e-mail, but they don’t realize that for all changes, there is one system that works best for each individual. This Year I Will . . . helps you lock on to your unique formula for planning, implementing, and seeing a life change through, so you can use it again and again to tackle anything else you’d like to do.

For anyone who has broken a New Year’s resolution, fallen off a diet, or given up on fulfilling a dream, the ingenious strategies, inspiring stories, and sheer motivational energy of This Year I Will . . . help you make a promise to yourself that you can actually keep.

Answers to the jacket quiz: c, c, false, b. Take the whole quiz and learn your score at M.J. Ryan’s Web site, www.mj-ryan.com.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Fast forward a few months (or a few weeks) into any given new year, and most peoples' resolutions have been either forgotten or abandoned. As one of the creators of the bestselling Random Acts of Kindness series, author and life coach Ryan outlines a concrete and practical strategy for following through on a resolution while dealing with all of life's other ups and downs: "One of the tricks about change is that we have to figure out how to do it in the midst of everything else." In encouraging, easy-to-read chapters, Ryan tackles the obstacles that keep readers from their goals and provides helpful tools and language to quell negative, self-defeating thoughts. Championing affirmation and cognitive therapy strategies, Ryan urges readers to switch from "why" thinking to "what could be possible" thinking, using "right brain" skills to achieve success: "The right brain is future oriented. It's where our aspirations, our dreams, our longings reside." Ryan's handy self-help will prove welcome for anyone seeking gentle but solid help in achieving personal change.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

Advance Praise for This Year I Will . . .


"If you're struggling and think that one more book can't possibly make a difference, think again. MJ Ryan has the rare gift of breaking things down into clear pieces that can be tackled."
—Laura Berman Fortgang, author of Now What? 90 Days to a New Life Direction


"This Year I Will . . . is the go-to book to learn how to start that self improvement journey---and maintain it for life!"
 
—Pamela Peeke MD, MPH, FACP, author of Body for Life for Women
 

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 240 pages
• Publisher: Harmony; First Edition edition (December 26, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0767920082
• ISBN-13: 978-0767920087
• Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 0.9 x 7.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (67 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #21,558 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

M.J. combines a practical business perspective gained as a CEO of a publishing company with a strength-based approach to help clients reach professional and personal goals. Using methodologies from positive psychology and neuroscience, she is able to quickly identify a client's underlying thinking talents and helps them efficiently use them to overcome challenges and maximize success. She has coached many high level executives as well as entrepreneurs and individuals around the world who want lives of greater purpose and success.

Her clients include Frito Lay, Microsoft, Royal Dutch Shell, the U.S. military, Hewitt Associates, SRAK (a joint venture between Shell and the Saudi Arabian National Oil Company), the Cowell Foundation, the Boys and Girls Club, and the town of Paradise, Ca.

She is the author of many best-selling books including her latest ADAPTABILITY: How to Survive Change You Didn't Ask For and THIS YEAR I WILL...How to Finally Change a Habit, Keep a Resolution or Make A Dream Come True.

www.MJ-Ryan.com

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

228 of 234 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Inspiration, encouragement and advice for change January 29, 2007

By C. S. Clarke

Format:Hardcover

What I like best about M.J. Ryan is that she is a compassionate writer. She is writing about something that is very difficult to do: change. It is clear that she understands that change is hard; nobody is perfect, and people will slip. Her acceptance inspires your own acceptance of the perils of change and your personal foibles. She encourages you to take the leap into change despite your doubts. She makes you believe that change may be hard but with her advice it is possible and even probable.

Her advice is clear and precise; the book is jam-packed with information but without an excess of words. She looks at all the essential issues involved in making changes. She begins with the basics, the things that you must do to make a change and make it last: You must be specific. You must plan. You must prepare. You must really want it. You must make a commitment. You must take action. You must re-evaluate when things aren't working. You must get back on track when you slip up.

Yes, all of that sounds very familiar. What isn't so familiar is her analysis of exactly how all that works, why it works the way it does, and precisely what to do to assure that it works the way it should. She also tells you the probable reasons for your efforts going awry, as well as what to do when you do run into trouble.

Like any good writer who compels your attention, she illustrates her points with apt examples and anecdotes. As with the rest of her writing, the stories are made most effective by their brevity. I am reminded of a textbook I was once assigned in college. It was called "The Force of Few Words" and was about how poetry achieves its powerful effects. M.J. Ryan is not writing poetry, but her words are full of "rhyme and reason" and her advice together with her stories will make you believe in your power to change.

309 of 321 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Very precise January 26, 2007

By Atheen M. Wilson TOP 1000 REVIEWER

Format:Hardcover

Last year was a duzzy. So many things went wrong in my life, that I wondered if I'd get through the year intact. Feeling as down as I did, I'd been looking for books that might give me some help with restructuring my life and my attitude. This one is the best of those that I've read so far.

M. J. Ryan's book "This Year I Will..." is considerably more helpful than any other self-help book primarily because she is far more precise in her approach to change. She's also very up front with the fact that change is not going to come instantaneously or easily. Whether it's as simple as putting the laundry detergent in before the wash or after it (her own experience) or trying to lose weight or quit smoking, it will take time and hard work, and there are no handy short cuts about it.

This may be disappointing to those of us who would like a quick fix to our problems and who find dealing with them frustrating, time consuming, and sometimes expensive--remember all those health clubs, weight loss programs, clinics, and magic potions that purport to make weight loss "easy" but at great cost? Don't get discouraged; read on. The author gives points for past "failures" and looks at them as, more-or-less, "first attempts" rather than as a sign of our inability to make changes in our lives. Furthermore, she also tells you why this is so.

Unlike many of the self-help books out there, Ryan's gives you an explanation of why you have a hard time changing, and why it's important to get back on that "bicycle" and try again. It's quite obvious that she is an extensively read professional. Using very up to date information from the recent discoveries in mind-brain research, she describes the neurological processes that go into making our bad habits so difficult to eradicate.

Without going into endless, unintelligible detail, she describes the processes by which our bodies make responses that have been found "successful" more permanent and automatic. She describes the various parts of the brain, their origin, and how they work together--or sometimes don't--so that it is clear why we sometimes resist making those changes we should or even must to survive. Without getting down to the circuitry or the chemistry, she points out that the higher levels of brain function, which can make executive decisions regarding the wisdom of change, may be subverted by the more basic levels of automatic behavior. Responsible for the flight-fight response and for the safety and wellbeing of the organism this more emotional brain may not be willing to help. Might in fact even work at cross purposes.

Ms Ryan explains that neuropathways become hardwired in our brains to the point where they are virtually ineradicatable . It is often said in books on mind-brain research, "nerves that fire together wire together," and as the author says, you're stuck with them.

What she proposes is not brain surgery to remove the troublesome pathway but developing a new pathway that competes with the old one. She points out that it takes a lot of time and work to create such a competitive behavior, but that with each successful effort to do so, the nerves responsible for the behavior become more habituated to the activity, making it easier with time.

Ryan also notes that we WILL have lapses as we go, because those old pathways are pretty powerful. Just having given it a try, though, has already started to initiate the changes desired--at least we now have a wagon to fall off of. She has several good recommendations on how to gradually bypass that old pathway and even several alternative approaches for some tasks.

The book is arranged in a graduated format of chapters, each one giving in a short few pages the information you need at each point in your effort to change. I read the book cover to cover first in about two hours, then I began at the beginning and started following some of her suggestions. Each chapter becomes sort of a "workbook" of things to do at each level of the change process.

The author also makes reference to other writers on the subject of personal change that have interesting things to add, and it is obvious that she does not work in a vacuum but in collaboration with others in the field; in short she's open minded. So there are other resources to which you may turn as need arises.

Probably one of the most important points she makes is that one needs to be definite about which change you're willing to make the effort to undertake. Global responses make taking action on anything impossible, so you have to select your changes with care. She also suggests that the problem be specific, with clearly defined behaviors needed to accomplish your goal and a clear means of evaluating the change. She makes a point of noting that monitoring the progress of your change is important, partially because it gives a clear measure of success and partially because it provides the satisfaction of actually seeing your efforts worth their expense. Ryan even sees back sliding as a means of assessing your progress and as an opportunity to evaluate what works and what doesn't, and thereby to make appropriate changes in your plan.

An excellent book, very precise in its recommendations.

102 of 108 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Want to Keep a Resolution? Try This Book... January 3, 2007

By merlot

Format:Hardcover

I ran across this book by accident but I'm glad I did. It is very interesting. The book focuses on 3 of the 5 stages of change - preparation, action/implementation and maintenance. The author utilizes wonderful examples and real life mini case studies to illustrate her points. I find that I enjoy the book more when I read a few passages, put the book aside, then go back to it. It gives me time to digest it. The author does make lots of references to other authors works and quotes famous people (i.e. Naomi Judd) in the passages which makes reading sound a little like an advertisement for other authors work but it's not so annoying that the book isn't still worth having.

If you're like me, I make solid resolutions but then I sometimes have a hard time following through. This book will help you think of resolutions in a new way and consider some things you may not have thought of before. Your success in achieving your resolutions is worth the price of this book. I think this would be a nice Christmas or Birthday gift as well.