Toilet Training-The Brazelton Way [Paperback]

T. Berry Brazelton (Author), Joshua Sparrow (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 6, 2004

Parents will welcome Brazelton's uniquely empathetic, wise, and helpful approach to this inevitable and often trying issue. Toilet training is a job for the child and not the parent, and by trying to force the issue or even encourage too hard, parents can set the stage for trouble. By "listening to the child," parents will know when their child is ready, and by guiding children in a series of gentle small steps, parents can help them make the accomplishment their own. A generation and more of children have been trained "the Brazelton way," and now he and Dr. Sparrow have distilled this advice into one priceless little guide. They first lay out the Touchpoints approach to the issue (a "mistake" can mean the child is making progress on some other front), then discuss the timing of this big achievement, and finally deal with how to respond if problems occur. For parents who want to get past this issue cheerfully, with the least fuss and turmoil, this is the one and only book to get.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Beloved pediatrician T. Berry Brazelton offers hope and help for parents whose bathroom has become a battleground. With co-author Dr. Joshua Sparrow, Brazelton outlines a "waiting and watching" approach to toilet training. First, parents learn to recognize "touchpoints" (developmental signs of a child’s readiness to graduate from soggy diapers) including "potty talk and play," awareness of other’s toilet habits, and the ability to imitate behavior and understand directions. Readiness is further defined by the capacity for "object permanence," allowing a child to "say good bye to poop without feeling that apart of her will disappear." Next, parents should focus on a child’s temperament. Parents are encouraged to confront "the ghosts in the nursery", by exploring how memories of their own toilet training create anxiety, pressure or overreaction. Braze! lton and Sparrow use this child-centered model to resolve a broad range of problems including bedwetting, constipation, and preschool pressure. The authors’ clear and reassuring tone could be leavened with a bit more comic relief, but it is hard to imagine a more wise or well-detailed guide to this central milestone of toddlerhood. -- Barbara Mackoff

Review

"A lifesaver...This handy guide offers up [Brazelton's] own uniquely wise, sympathetic and helpful approach...Priceless." -- Curled Up with a Good Book January 2004

"Brazelton and Sparrow constantly remind us of the joy and hilarity of parenting." -- Time

"Brazelton's calm and positive approach to childrearing has earned him the title of America's most trusted pediatrician." -- MSNBC.com 01/14/04

"Essential addition to a busy parent's library." -- Publishers Weekly

"Excellent...Concise, practical, age-by-age, issue-by-issue advice that provides a window into the mind of the child." -- Bookviews.com February 2004

"Gives advice for each stage of the early years, emphasizing that the child's motivation is the key to success." -- Harvard Medical School's Focus 02/06/04

"[Brazelton is] the pre-eminent name in child-rearing in this country." -- Fort Worth Star-Telegram 03/29/04

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Product Details

• Paperback: 144 pages
• Publisher: Da Capo Press (January 6, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0738209201
• ISBN-13: 978-0738209203
• Product Dimensions: 7 x 5 x 0.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #45,602 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

64 of 65 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Read this BEFORE your child is ready to train, July 15, 2004

By 

Allison (Tucson, AZ United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Toilet Training-The Brazelton Way (Paperback)

This book came out when my son had just turned 3. I had been tearing out my hair worrying about potty training, and I believe that if I'd had this book when I was first considering the issue, I'd have had a much easier time of it. The book is short and easy to read, but dense with useful information. Brazelton backs up his "method" with firsthand information about child development. He is a doctor who has seen many children and their parents, not some person who got lucky with a forceful method that they think should work for everyone.

Brazelton stresses that age is not a determinant for potty training readiness. He outlines several readiness signs. If you've researched potty training, most will seem familiar to you. What I found unique about his list is that he indicates that ALL conditions must be met before a child is ready, so there is no guesswork.

Brazelton's "method" isn't a step by step troubleshooting guide. I kept wishing for such a thing, but it doesn't exist because parents need to use judgement and compassion in helping a child achieve this milestone. There is no sure fire recipe. But there are some things you can do that are key: Don't force a child who isn't ready. Don't approach potty training as a discipline issue. Do give children choices. Do remove barriers such as training then while bare bottomed so that they don't need your help with clothing. Don't show your anxiety about training or the child will pick up on it.

The book includes chapters on special situations (constipation, encopresis, etc.). It also gives gender specific advice such as waiting to teach boys to urinate while standing until they are proficient at going "Number 2" in the toilet (once they stand up, it's hard to get them sitting again). I highly recommend this book and would suggest that even parents with children as young as 1 read it to prepare for potty training. Plan on spending at least a few weeks on making the transition, and more realistically, months. My son was 3 years and 3 months before we made any real progress at potty training.

This is NOT the book for anyone who thinks children should train by an arbitrary age. It is NOT for anyone who judges a parent based on when their children learn to use the toilet. It is DEFINITELY NOT for anyone who wants overnight success.

23 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic, October 4, 2004

By 

Reckless Consumer (USA) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Toilet Training-The Brazelton Way (Paperback)

Dr. Brazelton somehow combines being kind, gentle, and respectful of children with being incredibly effective as a parent. This is a thin little book, just over 100 pages, and it clearly, thoroughly explains ways to train, and also addresses any potential problems. I have referred to this book three times since I read it originally with specific problems and to my surprise, they have each been covered in detail in this book. What I especially love about this book is that there are not lots of rules or elaborate plans to remember. It's the kind of book you don't have to take notes on...the information is so logical and instinctive that it somehow just naturally becomes part of your knowledge. There's very little effort involved.

My daughter had several issues while potty training, and I regret that this book wasn't released earlier. After reading the book and implementing some of the things I learned, I realized that her problems were a direct result of some of my actions. Within a few days her potty training was reliable, and more importantly, both she and I were actually enjoying the process. It went from being stressful to me to being kind of touching in a way, as strange as that sounds! She was officially not a baby anymore!

Dr. Brazelton gives frazzled parents a fresh perspective and gently guides us through this exciting (and terrifying!) time in our children's lives. I really appreciate the work he's done and the information he's shared.

17 of 17 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Low-stress, relaxed training, February 17, 2005

By 

Madar (Houston, TX) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Toilet Training-The Brazelton Way (Paperback)

I found this book after trying a quickie method. My son did fine peeing in the potty, but after he began holding bowel movements, we found he had been constipated for a while even before we began training. We went back to diapers. After a little looking around, I purchased this book because it addresses problems like that and is very centered on allowing the child to set the pace. This could take months and may include reverting back to previous steps along the way, including getting back in diapers temporarily. I am not against quicker methods, but this is how we will resume training because of our special circumstances. So if you are looking for training in 3 days...this isn't it. But if you want to let your child go about potty training when he is ready and can accept occasional backslides, I would highly recommend this book.