Customer Reviews

Transcending Post-infidelity Stress Disorder (PISD): The Six Stages of Healing

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4 star:		(1)
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This book is easy to use to find the information you need quickly. This book gives tools for healing in a format that is easily accessible. Ortman outlines the symptoms of post traumatic stress quickly, and explains them well. I would think that if someone wants the information in this book, then a lengthy read to find helpful information would be tedious.

This book is a long-overdue clarification of what can really happen in response to infidelity, to contrast the previous limited view that the partner of someone who was unfaithful is automatically codependent (implying that they had a sickness and control issues). Ortman, on the other hand provides compassionate insight into understanding the traits that make one more vulnerable to post-traumatic responses so that people feel empowered. His seemingly accurate approach applies the post traumatic stress model to infidelity responses with uncanny clarity. This is a very valuable compendium of information for quick insight and long-term healing.

This book by Ortman offers sensitive and well-aimed tools. It can also serve as a reference for someone experiencing post traumatic stress because of abusive relationships in general (traumatic work relationships, betrayals, abandonment, traumatically betrayed friendships, etc.).

This book has changed my life. It helped me to recognize that after suffering from infidelity for 10 years, that I can finally put a name to what I have. I have worked through the book and feel the beginnings of forgiveness. If you are angry or PISD I would stongly suggest you read this book.

This book is a lifesaver for now, I have just suffered on the recieving end a relationship infidelity and now understand that it is a devestating life event. This book puts all the unexplained emotional behaviors associated with a cheating mate in perspective. I am not nuts, just wounded. I hope when finished with this book I will have recovered enough to feel some of lifes happiness again.

This author is on-line with a vocal interview and is quite the speaker as well, he is what he writes.

DebbieTranscending Post-infidelity Stress Disorder (PISD): The Six Stages of Healing

This book has been amazing. Granted I didn't experience a traditional "affair," it completely pin pointed exactly how I was feeling from the betrayed partner's point of view. His model of comparing affairs to PTSD couldn't be a more accurate depiction of how I have felt and he gives several examples and tips to dealing with affairs. It is such a huge relief knowing that the whirlwind of emotions I have experienced is normal. Such a great buy, I would recommend it to anyone who has been through any sort of affair or betrayal by their partner.

Great book. Well written, helps to make sense of the emotional turmoil that the betrayed finds themselves buried in. Contact Beyond Affairs Network and read! You are not going crazy your feelings are justified and with knowledge and support you can survive and have the potential for growth!!! Remember one thing your old relationship is over but there is the potential for it being better after healing takes place. It will be difficult to believe in the early days of discovery but know that you aren't going crazy and you have a right to feel whatever it is you're feeling.
This book is written with some religious perspective and may not be for everyone but helped me through the painful part of the discovery and recovery! Good luck!

Enormously helpful. I discovered my husband had a long-term emotional affair which was escalating into a sexual tryst in February 2011. I wish this had been the first book I bought to navigate the painful seas that one has to sail to regain stability. Written with compassion, it can be a touchstone during the days when one wants to slip back into denial, pretending the betrayal and the lies never happened.

I am currently experiencing all this pain from the discovery of infidelity and subsequent departure of my spouse. Reading this book helped me greatly to identify and process my emotions with the questions and examples provided. The trauma was really due to how overwhelming all the emotional reactions were at the discovery and the split up. I was reeling. Reading generally helps to calm me and reading the advice in the book helped me to normalize my feelings. It also helped that different religious beliefs pertaining to prayer, mediation, perspective of the spiritual helped me to see that there are universal ways of identifying emotions, setting them straight, and processing them in bite-sized pieces. I will re-read the book when I need to.

I found this book really helpful. It gives you do's and dont's to the healing process for each stage. My husband (the cheater) isn't one to read, but I think it could be helpful for both spouses to read this book. It will give the cheater an idea of what the victim is going through and what they need. For me reading these books I was trying to get a better understand of what I was feeling and what the healing process would look like. It was important for me to read that anger is a stage and that it is ok to feel that way but still want to work through things. There were sections I skipped if it got too religious but overall there was not a huge religious tone. I know that I didn't miss important information by skipping that section but for someone who wants faith apart of their healing process there is something for you. It was an easy read, which is something else I found helpful. Some of the other books out there are hard to read and during this time in your life you don't need anything else trying. I will definitely reread this book every couple of months to keep understanding my feelings and my spouse. I would recommend this for anyone who wants to understand and heal.

The author explains very well the process of pain that happens when an affair happens in a marriage. It is very helpful. So that after a long marriage and in the middle of cancer if your spouse cheats and says it wasn't planned and you find out and also hear they are living with them and then you are told they left them and you buy a home and a few days later you are deserted...this book will help you to see that the world spins and you can go on even though your spouse did a pretty good job of destroying everything in your life that you hold dear.