Trusting Yourself: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed and Live More Happily with Less Effort [Hardcover]

M. J. Ryan (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 11, 2004

We are flooded every day with messages from so-called experts in magazines and on TV telling us what’s wrong with us. Our teeth aren’t white enough, we aren’t good enough lovers, we aren’t exercising enough, we have ADHD. No wonder we’re dogged by worry and self-doubt!

Luckily, M. J. Ryan can help. As the creator of the bestselling Attitudes of Gratitude and The Power of Patience, Ryan discovered that the classic virtues can help bring peace and light to our lives. Now, in Trusting Yourself, Ryan reveals how the long-forgotten virtue of self-trust lets us feel less overwhelmed and happier every day. Trusting yourself makes choices easier, lets you express your unique talents, and gives you greater optimism and joy.

How do we learn to set the critics aside and trust ourselves instead? Ryan teaches us how to start learning what is right with us. First she reveals the inner attitudes that nurture self-trust. If you accept that we learn through trial and error, if you believe that we each have unique strengths and that no one of us has to have them all, if you realize that labels only get in the way, then your self-trust will grow, your worries will shrink, and you’ll find happiness and success with a lot less effort.

Ryan also shares the “best practices” of those who trust themselves: Learn the way Quakers make their most important decisions by asking each other open-ended questions. When you’re feeling overwhelmed by a big project, draw on the secret of time management experts and ask, What’s the next actionable step? And when you make a mistake, remember that the master weavers of Persia include an intentional error in every carpet, to remind us that nothing human is supposed to be perfect.

A celebration of an untapped source of personal power, Trusting Yourself helps us find more peaceful, saner lives every day.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Everyone feels overwhelmed by life’s increasingly dizzying whirlwind, believes Ryan: we all worry that we can’t keep up with our to-do lists or avoid the messages from media and advertising telling us that our homes aren’t fancy enough, our teeth aren’t white enough, or our parenting skills aren’t good enough. It’s no wonder, she says, that many people today turn outward for help, seeking advice from friends, the Internet, talk show experts—anyone who will help them keep up with the world around them. However, the real problem is not that people are inadequate, says Ryan, but that "we seem to have lost the sense of ourselves as reliable sources of the wisdom we need to navigate through our lives." Instead of looking to others, she says, people in fact have the power to help themselves—simply by trusting themselves. Ryan (The Power of Patience) instructs readers how to learn the attitudes and behaviors that encourage self-trust and lead toward a happier, more peaceful life. In a cozy, inviting style, she draws readers into her asset-focused approach with friendly advice, anecdotes and exercises. By focusing on what is right and strengthening that quality, we will, she promises, find that life is more fulfilling; we can learn to realize our talents and accept our shortcomings. For worry-freaks, perfectionists, those who just can’t say "no," or those stuck in stale careers or unhealthy relationships, the book is particularly refreshing. Ryan is neither overbearing nor preachy, but instead allows readers to make their own connections to her words.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

"Mary Jane's book has softened and yet empowered me with insights, information and inspiration on the life enhancing benefits of self-trust.  I wish she had written this while I was raising Wynonna and Ashley. If you'll take her wisdom to heart you'll find greater happiness in your relationships and in your mind."
–Naomi Judd, author of Naomi’s Breakthrough Guide



"MJ Ryan is right: many of our individual problems and collective unhappiness stem from our lack of self-trust. TRUSTING YOURSELF reminds us of this essential aspect of living a full life and offers us stories and practical suggestions for re-establishing self-trust even as we face our human foibles and flaws with honesty and humor. A valuable book for living today to the fullest."
-Oriah Mountain Dreamer, author of The Invitation and The Call



"With clarity and compassion, MJ Ryan provided priceless guidance for filling in my self-trust blanks and, better yet, convinced me that I had the ability and wisdom to do so. TRUSTING YOURSELF has shot to the top of my gift-giving list!"
-Sue Patton Thoele, author of The Courage To Be Yourself



"Cultivating genuine self-trust is at the heart of living and loving fully. In her new book, TRUSTING YOURSELF, M.J. Ryan not only shows us how, she gives us the confidence to take the necessary steps. Through heart-warming stories and insightful guidance, M.J. reminds us of our inherent value, wisdom and wholeness."
-Tara Brach, author of Radical Self-Acceptance



"M.J. Ryan has identified the great Teacher within us all, that gentle presence, whole and certain, that is always here to guide us. It is no less than the essence of our self. But how do we access it? In engaging personal narrative and precise precept, Ryan takes us by the hand and gently leads us back to ourselves. Perhaps more than any other book, TRUSTING YOURSELF is an invitation to come home."
-Hugh Prather, author of The Little Book of Letting Go and Notes to Myself

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 204 pages
• Publisher: Crown Archetype (May 11, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0767914902
• ISBN-13: 978-0767914901
• Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 0.7 x 7.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #274,314 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

M.J. combines a practical business perspective gained as a CEO of a publishing company with a strength-based approach to help clients reach professional and personal goals. Using methodologies from positive psychology and neuroscience, she is able to quickly identify a client's underlying thinking talents and helps them efficiently use them to overcome challenges and maximize success. She has coached many high level executives as well as entrepreneurs and individuals around the world who want lives of greater purpose and success.

Her clients include Frito Lay, Microsoft, Royal Dutch Shell, the U.S. military, Hewitt Associates, SRAK (a joint venture between Shell and the Saudi Arabian National Oil Company), the Cowell Foundation, the Boys and Girls Club, and the town of Paradise, Ca.

She is the author of many best-selling books including her latest ADAPTABILITY: How to Survive Change You Didn't Ask For and THIS YEAR I WILL...How to Finally Change a Habit, Keep a Resolution or Make A Dream Come True.

www.MJ-Ryan.com

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

34 of 35 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Don't trust me - read this book for yourself!, May 24, 2004

By 

AtomoMan (Colorado, USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Trusting Yourself: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed and Live More Happily with Less Effort (Hardcover)

I have been a fan of Ms. Ryan's for some time now. Her writings on kindness have been quite influential on the values I cherish and how I aspire to live my life. In her new book, "Trusting Yourself", she addresses what I believe is an epidemic in our "future shock" culture - people feeling overwhelmed, perfectionistic, self-doubting, defective, and dependent on experts to tell us how to live. Reading her (as usual) insightful and empathic words, I have come back to my senses and to my inherent common sense. A much-needed balm for our frantic psyches in these challenging times. Highly recommended reading for anyone who's wavered in their faith in their own abilities and passions!

16 of 17 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Just the right book title that we need, but tolerable book content, December 21, 2006

By 

Siew Ping Wong (Sydney, Australia) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Trusting Yourself: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed and Live More Happily with Less Effort (Hardcover)

We do need a book on how to trust ourselves. This was the reason why I had read and bought this book.

The author tried to explore the natures of trust; but somehow, I found the book 'not a very strong book', boring and hard to finish! Maybe it's just me, but now that I am reviewing the book again, I could not remember anything useful/helpful which I had read and wonder about the value of my time and money!

13 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars Not what I was expecting, January 9, 2007

By 

Certified Master Dog Trainer & Author "Everyt... (Holly Springs, NC, USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Trusting Yourself: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed and Live More Happily with Less Effort (Hardcover)

I was very disappointed with this book. I found it to be very repetitive, filled with things I already knew and so slow moving I couldn't even get through it. Might be perfect for someone who is truly having a "nervous breakdown," but not for the person who is generally well adjusted but wanting to be a bit happier.