The Truth Comes Out: When Someone You Love is in A Same Sex Relationship [Hardcover]

Nancy Heche (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 5, 2006

This is the beginning of a beautiful love story, Nancy wrote in her diary after meeting Don Heche, the man she was to marry. Five children and 25 years of marriage later, it seemed as if they were the perfect family. Then Don was diagnosed with AIDS—the shocking discovery of his homosexual secret. This was only the beginning of loss and heartache. Shortly after Don’s death, their 18-year-old son, Nathan, died in a car crash and Nancy fell into years of personal darkness. Eventually, as she was drawn into a long journey of growth and healing, her youngest daughter, Anne, began a very public lesbian love affair. Despite Nancy’s life circumstances, she held on to what she knew of God’s promises from Scripture and is discovering how to look at people and the world with God’s perspective through eyes full of love and blessing. Her inspiring story of faith and courage will offer hope to anyone who has ever been on the brink of despair, or wondered how to respond with love to someone in a same-sex relationship.

Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

This is the beginning of a beautiful love story, Nancy wrote in her diary after meeting Don Heche, the man she was to marry. Five children and 25 years of marriage later, it seemed as if they were the perfect family. Then Don was diagnosed with AIDS—the shocking discovery of his homosexual secret. This was only the beginning of loss and heartache. Shortly after Don’s death, their 18-year-old son, Nathan, died in a car crash and Nancy fell into years of personal darkness. Eventually, as she was drawn into a long journey of growth and healing, her youngest daughter, Anne, began a very public lesbian love affair. Despite Nancy’s life circumstances, she held on to what she knew of God’s promises from Scripture and is discovering how to look at people and the world with God’s perspective through eyes full of love and blessing. Her inspiring story of faith and courage will offer hope to anyone who has ever been on the brink of despair, or wondered how to respond with love to someone in a same-sex relationship.

About the Author

DR. NANCY HECHE brings a compassionate and practical approach to some sensitive and painful life issues. After her husband’s death from AIDS, Nancy experienced the international media rush when her daughter began a highly publicized lesbian affair. Nancy is an instructor at Loyola University and Judson College in Illinois, and has earned a master’s and doctorate in Pastoral Counseling. She has a private practice in psychotherapy where she specializes in communication and relationship issues, and is a popular Bible-study teacher.

Product Details

• Hardcover: 224 pages
• Publisher: Regal (September 5, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0830739122
• ISBN-13: 978-0830739127
• Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.1 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (21 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #612,023 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Most honest book by Christian, March 22, 2007

By 

Marsha Marks (Savannah, GA) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Truth Comes Out: When Someone You Love is in A Same Sex Relationship (Hardcover)

This is the most honest book by a Christian I have ever read. I love it. I love the bold, obvious pain that comes across in the prose. I love the story of someone who has suffered more than I --- and lived to tell about it, and I love her anger - because who wouldn't be angry. This book is going to help a lot of families and I, for one, am grateful it was written. Out of Nancy Heche's pain, comes gain - in comfort of others.

36 of 52 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Very Mixed Feelings, December 11, 2006

By 

Karen J. Rath (State College, PA USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Truth Comes Out: When Someone You Love is in A Same Sex Relationship (Hardcover)

I am glad that someone has written a book from the point of view of an evangelical Christian who is seeking to encourage others to have a more respectful attitude toward the gay community. Unfortunately, the person who wrote this book is so extremely self-centered and such an emotional mess, that it is difficult to take anything she says seriously or to trust her advice.

In many ways, I very much appreciate Nancy Heche's commitment to having love and respect for those to whom she refers as "living homosexually." I expect that most people who read her book are evangelical Christians, and because that community has such a poor record at treating gay people with love and respect, Nancy Heche's book is a big step in the right direction.

However, I read her daughter Anne Heche's book first, the memoir "Call Me Crazy," and I was extremely disappointed that Nancy does not address some of Anne's accusations against her. Anne accuses her mother of repeated physical abuse, and also of not protecting her from her father's sexual abuse, which Anne believes her mother knew about. Nancy Heche does not once mention that Anne believes that she was repeatedly raped by her father. Perhaps Nancy believes that this never happened. Even so, she should have brought it up. There is not a single reference to Anne's book. This absence greatly detracts from her claim that she is giving a complete and honest account of her life.

Nancy Heche is now a psychotherapist who gives seminars called "It's All About Me," in which she helps people take responsibility for their own feelings and for changing themselves, rather than trying to change their loved ones. While I am all for taking personal responsibility, that title very much characterizes Nancy's whole approach to everything. While she claims to be a Christian who is committed to doing God's will, her entire story is one long tale of self absorption. She makes it clear that the same self-centered approach that allowed her children's needs and safety to be neglected so that she could live a life that appeared to be perfect, is still going on in her seminars, which are more geared toward getting strokes and positive reinforcement for Nancy than for helping those in need.

If you are a Christian who has difficulty loving and dealing with homosexuals, this book will help you to learn tolerance and respect. If you are anyone else, don't waste you time on the whinings of a deeply messed up woman, who at nearly 70 and with a doctorate in counseling, still can't see past her own narrow-minded perspective.

4 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars Only partial truth, November 12, 2010

By 

Kim Christain "K" (CO) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Truth Comes Out: The Story of My Heart's Transformation (Hardcover)

I feel Dr Heche comes up very short in discussing how to make amends with a lesbian daughter. I myself am not lesbian, but I am a survivor of child sexual abuse, just like her Ann. The fact that she did not discuss addressing that very deep pain of Ann's tells me she seems to STILL have her head in the sand. How can she encourage parents to say, "I realize you must have had some serious pain to cause you to make this decision..." to their child and then not share her own experience? The whole book is about sharing her experiences, minus the most important one - mending her strained relationship with her daughter. Dr Heche did not share about how she apologized for not being there for Ann or protecting her from the pedophile father. The book leaves you to think that Ann was on her way to healing since she returned to heterosexuality - FAR from it. Do a Google search for Ann Heche and you'll see that she is still hurting very much. Yes, Nancy had a change of heart about the homosexuals, Big Deal! Any decent mom would if it were their kid. Being such a bad mom just made it even more imperative especially if you're child is famous and you've got initials behind your name. The truth shall set US free, ALL the Truth.

It's been a year since I read this and I suspect exploitation on Nancy's part. She is so far from making amends with Anne and I have to wonder if this book has widen the canyon even more.