Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court [Paperback]

Harvey Brownstone (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 1, 2009

Explaining complex family law concepts and procedures in a jargon-free style, this resource includes detailed information on how family court works, offers easily understandable case examples, and describes alternatives to litigation that are designed to help prevent families with children from entering the legal system to resolve disputes. Exploring subjects that apply to all parties involved in resolving separation, divorce, and custody conflicts—judges, lawyers, mediators, parenting coaches, psychologists, family counselors, and social workers—this reference demystifies the role of lawyers and judges, debunks the myth that parents can represent themselves in court, and examines each parent’s responsibility to ensure that post-separation conflicts are resolved with minimal emotional stress to children. 

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Provides a rare glimpse of what a sitting judge thinks about the good, the bad and the ugly realities of the family law court system . . . [and] provide[s] better guidance to clients, especially the final chapter that is full of heartfelt and wise advice."  —The Lawyers Weekly

"Every lawyer should provide clients with a copy of Tug of War and encourage them to read it before proceeding with their case."  —Anu Osborne, The Canadian Bar Association

About the Author

Harvey Brownstone has been a judge for more than 12 years and presides over family court in North Toronto. He lives in Toronto.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 200 pages
• Publisher: ECW Press (January 1, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1550228706
• ISBN-13: 978-1550228700
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #712,291 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #70 in Books > Law > Family & Health Law > Children

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Worth the Read!, April 1, 2009

By 

RM (USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court (Paperback)

This book is so unique (the first written by a sitting judge) and readable that I finished it in one sitting. It's written for the general public and speaks primarily to people who need to resolve issues relating to custody and support of their children. The judge makes a plea to parents to use the family court as a last resort and explains alternatives to litigation, like mediation. He also provides a thorough explanation of how the family courts and laws operate, including how they intersect with the criminal justice system. But, the book really shines when the judge shares what he has seen in his courtroom during his 14 year career on the bench. Using real life anecdotes, sprinkled with empathy and humor, Judge Brownstone teaches us all about the impacts of separation and divorce on children. Read this book to educate yourself and give it to someone you know who could benefit from Judge Brownstone's insight.

4 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Read, June 12, 2009

By 

FM (Long Island, NY USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court (Paperback)

Tug of War is a must read for parents entering the sad and unpredictable phase of life you never thought would be your reality...divorce and child custody issues. We don't enter parenthood thinking that one day we will have to make custody decisions regarding our children. Mr. Justice Harvey Brownstone approaches the subject with great knowledge and real life experiences he witnesses each day in his courtroom. Each aspect of this procedure is explained in detail and most importantly, in easy to understand text. The author pays careful attention to the fact that people from all walks of life may be turning to his book for guidance. It certainly provides much food for thought and hopefully alternatives for parents in this situation. The bottom line...it's not about you, it's about your children. Some examples of events that have occurred in Justice Brownstone's courtroom are chilling when you remember these are innocent children's lives being discussed. As an educator, I have witnessed all too often, parents who can't separate their issues and their children's education issues at a parent conference. Too many times I've had to referee "the games" parents play when it comes to their children. I only wish I had copies of "Tug of War" to give them as their "homework assignment"! This is a book that should become part of every university's curriculum, especially in courses focusing on family and education careers. I personally have given copies to people I know who are in this precarious situation. Thank you Mr. Justice Harvey Brownstone for tackling this most important and current subject.

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent resource for all separating parents, December 26, 2011

By 

DLF - See all my reviews

This review is from: Tug of War: A Judge's Verdict on Separation, Custody Battles, and the Bitter Realities of Family Court (Paperback)

This book explains what happens in Canada when a family unit disintegrates, especially when there are children involved.

Justice Brownstone's theory is that when people break up, they must adopt a mature approach of dealing with their former partners, especially when children are involved. However, he also addresses the topics of finances in a number of chapters, which describe how you can try to resolve your conflicts without going to court. He has a chapter on alternatives to litigation. He describes when going to court is necessary. There are also details about lawyers, what you should look for, and why they are very important in their role.
Especially close to his heart is the chapter on custody and access disputes. He talks about the importance of joint custody as a concept.

DeRusha Law Firm

The above review has been prepared by Haig DeRusha, senior counsel and Family Law Specialist at DeRusha Law Firm. Our firm has four lawyers and an articling student, and has prominent lawyers practicing family and divorce law in both the collaborative and the litigation approach, which practice areas include Mississauga, Brampton, Milton and Toronto. More information can be obtained about DeRusha Law Firm by reviewing our website.