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The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mothers-In-Law Paperback – April 15, 2009


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The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mothers-In-Law + The Mother-in-Law Dance: Can Two Women Love the Same Man and Still Get Along? + Life as a Mother-In-Law: Roles, Challenges, Solutions
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 95 pages
  • Publisher: Bell Bridge Books (April 15, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0982175604
  • ISBN-13: 978-0982175606
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.3 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (54 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #112,569 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

New York Times best-selling author Haywood Smith did not start writing till she was forty. Seven years of learning, writing, and rewriting later, St. Martins Press published the first of six critically acclaimed, best-selling historical novels about "strong women, hunky heroes, accurate history, and upbeat endings."

After a devastating divorce left her financially destitute, she switched to writing humorous Southern women's fiction about Baby Boomer women who help each other through their various trials with creativity, loyalty, and lots of fun, earning Haywood a place on the New York Times best seller list. ("I sent my ex a thank-you note.")

Haywood adored her mother-in-law, who lived across the street for twenty-five years, then moved in at Haywood's invitation after the divorce. In her mother-in-law's memory, Haywood wrote a fun, helpful handbook titled THE TWELVE SACRED TRADITIONS OF MAGNIFICENT MOTHERS-IN-LAW.

Haywood loves to do stand-up comedy about her life (It's been wild.) and waives her speaker's fee for women's charity fundraisers, Red Hat regional meetings, and Friends of the Library groups. Contact her at haywood100@aol.com with EVENT in the subject line for particulars.

She also loves to hear from her fans at haywood100@aol.com and personally answers all her e-mails.

Customer Reviews

I enjoyed the book and had a good laugh while reading it.
pafarmer
Any mother-in-law who adheres to her 12 traditions is sure to have the best possible relationship with their child and their child's spouse.
Bluegrass Reader
I bought and read the kindle version before mailing a book to my MIL.
Green M&M

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

64 of 66 people found the following review helpful By Bluegrass Reader on May 22, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I was given the opportunity to review the latest book by Haywood Smith entitled "The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mother's-in-Law." As a daugther-in-law who obviously wasn't blessed with a Magnificent Mother-in-Law (rather got a MIL from you know where), I found this book quite humorous, yet full of excellent advice. I feel it is a must read for any mother-in-law or any prospective mother-in-law. Haywood Smith uses her Southern charm to outline practical advice for all mother-in-laws in a hilarious way. Her traditions range from "Magnificent Mother-in-Laws Cut the Apron Strings" to "Magnificent Mother-in-Laws are Flexible about Holiday Plans." Any mother-in-law who adheres to her 12 traditions is sure to have the best possible relationship with their child and their child's spouse.

This is a short (75 pages), easy read that will keep you laughing, yet is packed with wisdom. It would make an excellent gift for engagement parties or shower parties and according to the publisher, "It can even safely be given to a Mother-in-Law."
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful By jjmachshev VINE VOICE on April 25, 2009
Format: Paperback
Now here's a valuable book that imparts a message, yet does so in a VERY humorous manner without preaching! "The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mothers-in-Law" by Haywood Smith will have snickering, snorting, laughing, and (if you're married) suffering from a severe case of deja vu.

This is a perfect book to give as a gift...to just about any woman who has, will have, or has had a MIL (mother-in-law). I'm pretty sure that covers about 99% of women.

Haywood Smith provides twelve 'traditions' (read rules) for mothers-in-law (and mothers) everywhere with a full chapter of helpful advice, scenarios, and side-splitting commentary served up with a hefty dose of southern-style sweetness occasionally veering off into sarcasm.

A few of my favorite chapters were: Magnificent MILs ...Set and Respect Reasonable Boundaries, ...Bite Their Tongues, Never Wear Out Their Welcome, ...don't Martyr. I think the best thing about this book is that you could give one to your mother or mother-in-law 'as a joke'--and then pray they take Mrs. Smith's advice!!
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful By Michelle Kindt on June 2, 2009
Format: Paperback
As a parent with adult children and a psychotherapist working with parents of adult children, I highyl recommend this book as a significant tool to repair or maintain your relationships. Humorous, easily read and right on!
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Marsha on September 10, 2009
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This book should be required reading for every prospective, new, or even experienced mother-in-law. The advice is really good. It's also presented in a warm and humorous way. Haywood Smith is an incredibly talented writer.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Esperanza Valentin on September 24, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Who wants to be Magnificent? I just want to enjoy my children, their spouses, and my grandchildren.

What I’m offering is not an evaluation of the book but some of my reactions to reading the book. This book does not get to the core issues of why we feel unappreciated, devalued, alone, and neglected at times by our children. Those are some of the feelings I hear from friends that wish and are working toward having better relationships with their DIL/SIL. Sometimes, the book seems to say. “We have done our work raising our children, now let’s stay in our lane and watch or be careful what we say and do” There are a few valuable tools and pearls of wisdom in this book as to what to do and not do. My comment to that is, “It is not what our loved ones do but how we react to it”. We can choose wholeness and happiness instead of suffering, feeling hurt. This requires our own inner work. Expectations are a trap. People, our loved ones are not going to behave the way we expect. They may be doing their best. We can’t have a script for them depending on what we would do or how much we have given our children. They are going to be who they are at this point in time in their lives. Hopefully they are going to be considerate and lovable because that is how we raised our children and hopefully they will marry someone with those values. But not always.

I think having a support group where you develop your own Sacred Traditions of Being a Magnificent Mother in Law and that you adhere to them is a good idea. You may want to consider it with your friends who want to do that. But it can't be a pity party or just a place to empty out our emotions but a place you go to build positive ways to work through and deal with these issues and be able to laugh about it all as well.
Read more ›
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Jean M. on February 6, 2010
Format: Paperback
I just love this book. Hayward Smith is so clever and funny, but she also nails it on all the suggestions for mothers-in-law or mothers for that matter. The book is short, but packed with good stuff. It's in my collection with all of her other books.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful By monkeelv on May 4, 2010
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
As a new mother-in-law myself X 2 in the past 8 months, I downloaded this freebie book on my Kindle, hoping for some great advice. For me, it was common sense advice, nothing really enlightening -- a good review of proper mother-in-law behavior, maybe. I won't be passing the title on to other new mothers-in-law that I know.
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5 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Holly TOP 500 REVIEWER on October 2, 2010
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I picked this book up for my Kindle back in March. Last night I decided I wanted something that I could pick up and read that was on the more light-hearted side and this looked appealing. I started reading thinking I would just read a chapter or two but ended up going all the way to the end in one sitting. It's short and sweet but there is some incredibly powerful stuff in here.

This book is billed as containing the twelve sacred traditions of being a wonderful mother-in-law. While that may be great for marketing and trying to sell to a niche, it actually shortchanges the book in my opinion. This book is wonderful for everyone who comes in contact with any other human being on a regular basis. The basic message is to mind your own business and don't offer opinions or meddle in other people's business. While delivered humorously and often light-heartedly, there is a lifetime of wisdom contained in these pages. The twelve traditions apply not only to mothers-in-law but also apply to any other family member (particularly mothers) and friends. It does a great job of talking about what you shouldn't do or say if you want to have good relationships with those you care about. One of my favorite parts dealt with disguising opinions as questions. She hits the nail on the head with that one and many people should take a long, hard look at their interactions with others to see if "interest" is really "bossiness".

While very short, very readable, and often humorous, this book is worth its weight in gold. If you want good relationships with other adults, take these to heart. If you want to have people resent you, be angry with you, and often try to spend as little time with you as possible, don't follow any of this advice.

You could go to a therapist and pay $125 an hour to find out why your relationships aren't working or you can buy this and do it yourself.
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