Customer Reviews

Two in a Bed

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I enjoyed reading this book as I could take comfort in knowing that I was not the only one out there having trouble sharing a bed with someone. And I was able to show my spouse that I wasn't just complaining needlessly. Unfortunately, the book was not as helpful as I had hoped because it didn't offer many suggestions on how to actually get some sleep.

While sleep is usually thought of in terms of the individual, for millions of us it is a two-person activity. The author is one of the first to examine sleep in this way, and I soon realized why...the conclusions are obvious. Yes, the temperature of the bedroom matters. Yes, a TV in the bedroom can interfere with sleep. None of what is discussed is at all surprising. Further maddening is the style in which the author presents his data. Instead of presenting anecdotes or case studies in prose form like most nonfiction authors, we get unedited dialogue between the author and the interviewees. This alone would be hard to read, but Rosenblatt complicates it further by inserting parenthetical comments made by the primary speaker's partner. Example:

Kristen: ...'cause I can always put on more clothes and still be (laughing) (Dan: warm) warm.

An old axion states that an invention always seems obvious once it is in front of you. I acknowledge that the premise behind the book is novel. For me, however, it wasn't worth the read.

I was feeling frustrated with my own couple bed sharing challenges, and reading this book gave me hope that we will adapt (we have) and comfort that pretty much every couple deals with all kinds of conflict, challenges, rules, joys and idiosyncrasies in bed.

First, what this book isn't: It isn't a book that will help you get a better night's sleep, it isn't a self-help book on relationships. Rather, it's an academic/scholarly study of bed sharing that has mass appeal beyond the ivory tower. And in that respect, it's a great book--fascinating, interesting, and fun to read. Although we spend (hopefully) a third of our days in bed, the topic has been completely ignored by academic anthropologists.

Rosenblatt approaches bed sharing as a negotiation, a sociocultural institution, and a private affair that is nonetheless soaked in cultural expectations and standards. Let's face it, although many of us have shared a bed, few of us have stopped to think about the subtleties of doing so because when we're near a bed, we just want to get in it and sleep! Rosenblatt makes you think, perhaps for the first time, about all that's involved in sharing a bed--all the nuances and norms that you've probably engaged in but never realized or questioned.

Despite the scholarly nature of the book, it's very readable and doesn't drag itself down with discussions of esoteric theories. I found myself laughing out loud in some places because I could relate so much to what the interviewees were saying. And this book was all I could talk about to my friends for days afterward. I can't remember the last time I had so much fun reading an academic study.

The author interviewed 40+ couples and presented us an interesting
look at couple sleep. The most fascinating thing from this
sociological study is the role "sleep" plays in couple relationship.
Sleep, traditionally regarded as simply rest, has become vital part in
building intimate relationship. Sleep together provides a private
platform for a couple to communicate, share, and plan together.
Although these are not some exciting insights, researchers in
sociology and psychology may borrow these results for the problems
they study.