The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: How to Stay Sane and Care for Yourself from Pre-conception through Birth, 2nd Edition [Paperback]

Rachel Pepper (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 23, 2005

The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians covers everything you need to make the thrilling and challenging journey to motherhood: from choosing a donor to tracking fertility to signing the right papers on the dotted lines. Rachel Pepper's lively, easy-to-read guide is the first place to go for up-to-date information and sage advice on everything from sex in the sixth month to negotiating family roles.

Why a second edition? When the acclaimed first edition appeared, the author's daughter was only a few months old. This new edition takes into account the parenting know-how Pepper has developed over the intervening six years, as well as the evolving legal status of lesbian parents, and the increasing importance of the Internet for information on fertility, sperm banks, and donors. The resource section is greatly expanded, as are the sections on each trimester of pregnancy, on childbirth, and on life with a newborn. And Pepper provides more insight into preconception planning for both single lesbians and couples. An indispensable resource, The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians is now bigger and better.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"At last, a lesbian-specific treatise on making a baby and what to do with it once it arrives. Includes lots of bright, funny info about stuff like sperm bank selection and the legal rights of lesbian families." —The Advocate

About the Author

Rachel Pepper is the book editor at Curve magazine and works in the Lesbian and Gay Studies program at Yale.

Product Details

• Paperback: 250 pages
• Publisher: Cleis Press; 2nd edition (September 23, 2005)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 157344216X
• ISBN-13: 978-1573442169
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6.3 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #68,362 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #9 in Books > Gay & Lesbian > Parenting & Families
  • #71 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Social Sciences > Specific Demographics > Gay & Lesbian

More About the Author

Rachel Pepper is the editor of Transitions of the Heart: Stories of Love, Struggle and Acceptance by Mothers of Transgender and Gender Variant Children, published by Cleis Press and released in May, 2012. This groundbreaking collection by more than 30 mothers of diverse backgrounds and ages will provide a window into what mothers of gender non-conforming children and adults really think and feel about their children and their own journey of change. Rachel's previous books include the best-selling Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians (more than 22,000 copies sold!) and she is also the co-author of The Gay and Lesbian Guide to College Life, and The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Families and Professionals. Rachel is a practicing MFT intern working with the LGBT population and is also employed at La Ventana Treatment Center in San Francisco, a holistic private clinic for women with eating disorders. An experienced professional journalist and the long-standing book editor for Curve Magazine, Rachel lives in the Bay Area with her partner Kellen and daughter Frances. She can be directly contacted at [e-mail].

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

46 of 49 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Fresh, timely edition of this indispensable book October 5, 2005

By Sooty Shearwater

Format:Paperback

Hooray! The second edition of this first-of-its-kind book has even more useful information and is totally up-to-date. The best thing about it is still the author's voice, which is strong and supportive -- and funny -- on every page. This book is infused with the wisdom of someone who's been through it all, back when there weren't any books about it, and is eager to shepherd others through the process. Equally encouraging are the many quotes from other dyke mamas (and mamas-to-be) describing their own experiences, from the just- thinking-about-it stage to actually giving birth.

Some questions this book will help you think through: am I (are we) ready for kids? can I do it alone? how to choose a donor? what is it like, trying to get pregnant? what are my options if I don't get pregnant quickly? how will I handle being pregnant? what kind of birth do I hope for? what is it like for the non-bio mom? and what kind of family will we be in those early days?

In each case the author doesn't tell you what to do, but helps you figure out what YOU want to do. She clearly has her own preferences -- unmedicated birth is best; circumcision sucks; breastfeeding rocks! -- but they are carefully argued, pretty persuasive, and the tone is consistently pro-child and pro-women.

Sensibly, Pepper puts the tough stuff up front: the first chapter is about getting yourself as physically, mentally, financially and legally ready to start a family as you can possibly be. Then it's on to getting the goods, finding out what's going on under the hood, and starting the crazy ride on the conception "rollercoaster." The chapter offering Ten Tips to Keep You Sane during this crazy period is worth the price of the book alone!

These early chapters are the most detailed and probably the ones you'll read over and over, but there are also useful roadmaps to each trimester, as well as a helpful section on sexuality and pregnancy, birth options, and the early weeks with your baby. There's also a comprehensive index and a helpful section on extra resources, from lesbian-friendly sperm banks to useful books to dyke-mama blogs.

In a nice touch, the new edition is dedicated not only to "every lesbian dreaming baby dreams" but also "the many dyke daddies and tranny pops out there." Right on.

As a further bonus, the new cover is gorgeous, as is the photo of the author and her now seven year old daughter -- clearly that rollercoaster was worth it! It all adds to the supportive, happy vibe of this indispensable guide to what the author calls "the wacky world of lesbian conception and pregnancy."

15 of 16 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars USER FRIENDLY AND COVERS EVERYTHING! October 20, 2005

By Marjory C.

Format:Paperback

Rachel Pepper's new edition of her Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians is a welcomed event. With her clear writing and pull-no-punches style, Rachel takes the mystery and fear out of this amazing and popular process. Lesbians deserve to be spoken to in our own language, and this book is accessible and smart in the best ways. Things I didn't know I didn't know are answered fully, informatively, and often with a lightheartedness that reaches across the page to the reader so we can understand what's going on. I would recommend this book to any single or coupled lesbians who are thinking of embarking on the baby journey.

9 of 10 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Best Pregnancy Book For Any Non-Traditional Woman April 23, 2010

By Jennyness

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

This is the most extensive pregnancy book for women who have to WORK at getting pregnant rather than starting at the "oops you're pregnant" point. If you're straight but single, lesbian, or partnered to a transman, this book is for you! Ms. Pepper is wonderful at being all-inclusive to all of her readers, including the family and partners of the pregnant woman. The book is positive and upbeat while still being serious and realistic. There is absolutely nothing I would change, add, or take away from this book and is worth keeping at your bedside if you're pregnant or beginning the process.