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138 of 154 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
honest and moving, November 1, 2010
As the previous reviewer has pretty much summarised the entire book (!) I'll just say that this is an honest, moving and well written account of a dark time in Portia's life. It was hard to read how she brought herself close to death, keeping herself on a tiny allowance of calories and strenuous exercise (in high heels at times). I know Hollywood expects women to be thin, but I was saddened to read her accounts of costume fittings - where she was humiliated for being anything other than 'stick thin'.
I loved the story about meeting Ellen in 2001 at a concert, when Ellen invited her over to her house along with other guests. Portia thought she was just being polite, but it turned out that Ellen had only invited the other people over so she would have the excuse of a party to invite Portia. So Ellen was stuck with having to entertain all those people that night!
I think coming out as a lesbian in Hollywood is still a risky move (how many others are there? not many) and Portia is an inspiration to other women who are coming to terms with their sexuality and trying to live their life honestly. Well done Portia, from a fellow Aussie :)
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63 of 70 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Well written, just not a recovery book at all, November 6, 2010
Portia is an amzing writer. Her tale is gripping, captivating, and horrifying at the same time. This book reads like a page-turner and most readers will really enjoy the journey that she takes you on.
I also think it is a timely and true tale of how the influences of the media, Hollywood and the "thin-ideal" have come to dominate the way women feel about their bodies, that we are never "good enough" the way we are, and that we should always be comparing ourselves to others. In that way, I think that almost every woman will be able to relate to her story, eating disorder or not. But if you have ever had an eating disorder, you will recognize the triggers she writes about, and her story's darkness will be very familiar.
For those who are looking for help in these pages for their own eating disorder, what I will say is that this is NOT a book that really encourages recovery, I mean it is obviously an encouragement to live a healthy life, but you won't find helpful recovery advice or direction here - just so you know. As another review states, recovery is almost an afterthought in this book. So, be careful if yoou are sensitive to books that trigger. I am not discouraging buying the book, but I just think it makes a helpful review to know what you are and what you are not getting. As someone who has "intimate knowledge" of living with anorexia and bulimia, I will say that this is like looking in the mirror. Family memebers who don't understand the pain may also find it enlightening.
If you are looking for books to take you to the next step and point you toward recovery, or if you have a family member with anorexia or bulimia symptoms but is still very thin, I HIGHLY recommend to book "100 Questions and Answers about Anorexia Nervosa" by Dr. Sari Fine Shepphird. It is the best, most helpful book I have in my collection and I have been reading books about eating disorders for 15 years. If you want to know more about eating disorders like anorexia, it's so helpful. I also want to recommend "Crave: Why you binge and how to stop" by Dr. Cynthia Bulik, if you are looking for a book specifically about Binge Eating, on the opposite end of eating disorders.
Thank you, Portia, for your honesty. People need to see how this disorder ravages lives but that there is also life after an eating disorder.
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76 of 93 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
3.5 stars: The ups and downs of unbearable lightness, November 10, 2010
I bought this after seeing Portia with Oprah then on Ellen. Here were the ups and downs (no weight pun intended) of the book to me - to help you decide if it's for you.
- She's an interesting enigma - and an articulate, honest writer.
Before I read this I found Portia a little fascinating. I think a lot of good-will has been generated to her from just being associated with Ellen whom many people adore. Yet, despite her stints on TV shows - she's really not that well known or remembered outside of her attachment to Ellen nowadays. So, it's an interesting look at a sort of enigma, told straight and with far more honesty than one would expect.
- But, the period of her life the bulk of book is devoted towards - is a time of being a self-absorbed, emotionally unstable and rather stereotypically insecure Hollywood actress - which gets a little wearing at times. Sometimes, I found it seemed more like someone doing their journals for some self psychoanalysis, eating disorder project than actually trying to get a fuller tale across.
The main focus is her descent into an extreme eating disorder, as she obsesses over how she'll look in any given scene and whether she'll ever be "perfect enough". While it's interesting to hear how someone that had it pretty much all in Hollywood terms (the money, looks, shows, etc.) is so self-loathing and insecure inside, it gets harder to care as she goes along what she's eating and not eating, how much she exercises and how the only thing that interests her is herself. The other aspect of her fear of being "found out" as a lesbian is more interesting, but wasn't so much a focus of that time for her.
- This has been billed as something that younger women that suffer from eating disorders or body image issues should read - but, I'm just not that sure that's a good idea. Still, it's probably great for those that are around those w/ one that want to glimpse into the mind of why they're doing it and why they lie about it.
The "lost in anorexia" part gets most of the book, with her actual overcoming of the disease and dealing with her sexuality more openly getting smooshed into a couple of chapters at the end. Unfortunately, to the warped perspective of someone in the throws of an eating disorder - I fear that so much on the actual disease could very well mean that it reads like a "how to be a good anorexic" guide more than the tale of horror it truly is, particularly since she goes into such detail about how she achieves her great weight loss, and her continual refusal to give up the "thinnest pursuit" while still all the while having incredibly good material success. On the other hand though, she brings to vivid life the fears and mindset that drove her into her unhappy weight obsessed world that is more than worthwhile for those that have family or friends fighting the same battle.
Bottom Line: 3.5 stars. An honest look at one enigmatic Hollywood starlets terrible and unhappy battle with her inner demons and anorexia that's honest and well-written. But, it would have been more engaging, for me, if she'd brought a more robust picture and a bit more depth about herself and life - rather than focusing so absolutely on "the detailed hows and whys" of her anorexia and her inner struggle as a Lesbian. Still, for those that want to learn more about eating disorders and the mentality behind them - this is a book for you.
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