10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Understanding very troubled teenagers and how they can be helped, January 5, 2009
Finally somebody "gets" troubled teenagers! And can talk about it in straightforward, understandable English we can all understand--parents, psychologists, counselors and concerned adults.
How I spent my winter vacation: I read this book in a week-end, camped out on the couch while my college aged kids buzzed in and out with their friends at New Year's. I kept mumbling to myself "That's so right!" and chapter by chapter, block by block I put the theory and then the theory of action together, punctuated by slapping my forehead at the accuracy of the author's logic. I work for a public school district, so it takes a lot for me to complete a book like this on vacation time.
It was written by one of the smartest guys anywhere (Harvard, Yale) who spent the past 10 years building a successful therapeutic school putting into practice what he learned about kids and their families as a Psychiatrist before that. Montana Academy is located in the boonies, where like every snowflake or starry night sky, the details of these kids' lives are studied without distraction.
It starts unflinchingly with the 2 part problem statement, i.e. even when we know what works to save a suicidal or tormented teen, managed care rules and the voices of faceless insurance reviewers who have never met or seen the child insist on restrictions to treatment that prevent us from executing a plan toward mental health. These doorkeepers incur tremendous expense for society as a whole in the name of saving a nickel for insurance companies. And secondly, we haven't understood before what exactly is wrong with these kids because we are looking at the whole condition incorrectly. (I'll save the aha! moment for you to discover, so as not to spoil the read.)
Everyone knows some kid with these case histories, each of whom is touchingly described from varying perspectives as the book unfolds. Even if your kids are in good shape, this book helps you understand what has worked for them, and how it isn't over just because they head off to college. If you are a smart parent, a teacher or school leader, or anyone who deals with teens, this thoughtful, engaging and compelling book will knock you out. I wished I'd read it before the holidays, because it would have been my favorite family-with-teenagers gift.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Timely insight., March 23, 2009
Many of today's parents fear that their child will "fail to launch." Yet, the issues behind this phenomenon are not well-understood. Dr. McKinnon offers insight to why teens stall out, rebel, or escape rather than face growing up.
Out of concern for a struggling teen, parents seek professional help. Yet, today's insurance and managed care systems often disallow or curtail the supportive approach they truly need. The medical treatment model works with a "fix-it" mentality, yet the ills of a struggling teen are not so simple that a pill is the answer. Dr. McKinnon explains this clearly and in ways that are important.
Anyone raising children would benefit from reading this book. Dr. McKinnon offers rare insight from the world of private residential treatment. In communities, such as his, true healing occurs and the obstacles to maturity are gradually ameliorated. Parents and loved ones, gain new understanding, and can then help their children through clear limits and a relationship that is affirming of their worth. The result takes time, but what could be more important than saving a life and helping a young adult become productive for our society?
Mina Steen
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Right on the mark, August 31, 2009
In a world seemingly full of advice for parents of troubled teens, this book is a true standout. John McKinnon does a masterful job of discussing the roots of the problems so many of our children face. As the parent of a former Montana Academy student, I was particularly interested in hearing John's views. They are dead on the mark. (By the way, if you are unwilling or unable to own your part of the "problem" you may not like this book very much. It will cut you no quarter in with regard to your role and duty as a parent to provide an environment for your children to grow up to be mature, responsible, empathic adults.) My only regret is that I didn't read this book before we took the long drive out to Lost Prairie. For those who can't afford the Montana Academy tuition (and it was worth every penny) this book could at least help you regain you bearings and offer a chance for constructive change in your family situation.
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