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Uncommon Fathers: Reflections on Raising a Child with a Disability

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I can't explain what prompted me to buy this book but I'm glad that I did. The author of each essay has a child with special needs. Some with problems that we can't even imagine having to deal with. Each has taken the time to express how the birth and life of his child has changed his life. These fathers are truly special. I admired each one, not just because they had overcome (or were trying to overcome) enormous obstacles, but because they accepted one of God's children and expressed such love at such trying times. We all think that we could rise to the occasion and parent a child with special needs but these men are doing it and doing it better than I could ever hope to do myself. It's not too often that you read a book written by someone living through the experience who makes no attempt to get credit for what he's done. If you don't mind shedding a tear or two (for joy or sorrow), I recommend it to any mother or father.

"Uncommon Fathers: Reflections on Raising a Child with a Disability" has been a struggle to read. Finding the right tone for these comments has also proved hard. The book does provide a good but incomplete cross-section about how being the father of a disabled child affects one's life.

The editor, Donald Meyer, allows a number of fathers, most of whom are well-educated and from the higher socioeconomic strata, to share their experiences. Some are moving accounts that clearly depict the frustration, isolation, and sometimes enlightenment associated with parenting a child who is disabled.

Some are down-right irritating laments about a father's broken dreams or lost opportunities.

Regardless, the stories here are important, for they offer insights to parts of the human experience that, unless you are a member of this fraternity, most folks will never understand. Somehow, I wish that there could be both a wider audience for this book so that those in the mainstream might have an inkling of what happens to a family that includes a disabled individual.

I also wish that there were more stories from the blue-collar dads who struggle not only to survive financially but emotionally when their lives are also involuntarily altered by the flaws in our collective gene pool.

I wish also that the reflections here included more advice about how to cope with emotional issues, financial concerns, and long-term planning. My expectations were that those types of topics might be addressed more directly.

Still, the sketches in this book are valuable for anyone because they confirm both how fragile and resilient life really is.

It was so nice to finally read a book like this for fathers. My wife has read many books on having a child with a disability, and though I've found some of them helpful, this one met specific emotions for me as a father. I recommend this to any father who has a child with special needs...it's very affirming.

So many times in a family with special needs, the mom gets involved with taking care of the child and the other kids, and the dad gets left out. Dads have feelings too, and these fathers tell how they coped with having a special child. Should be a father's day gift for all the special fathers out there!

The last review for this book was over two years ago. I don't want dads to think the book is "dated" and couldn't be good for them now, in their situation. I have always listed this as the best book I have read on being a father of a child with a disability. It had meaning in 2004, 2008, and it will two years from now when you need to know, as a father, you are doing good in all you are trying to do. And you are not alone.

This book is a must read for fathers!

I didn't like all the stories or even many of them but the few I did made it worth while. I think another reviewer maybe was right, to quote him, "The editor, Donald Meyer, allows a number of fathers, most of whom are well-educated and from the higher socioeconomic strata, to share their experiences. Some are moving accounts that clearly depict the frustration, isolation, and sometimes enlightenment associated with parenting a child who is disabled. Some are down-right irritating laments about a father's broken dreams or lost opportunities." He went on to add we need to hear more stories from "blue-collar" dads. But who wrote that review? Not some guy that is going out to patrol our streets, remodel our kitchen or shovel snow for money tomorrow. If you want more "blue-collar" you will probably get more irritating laments? How would the reviews sound then?
Wait, I didn't sign on to argue with: loce_the_wizard. To all father's searching for a book for you, this is THE ONE! Start here and then branch out into the others.... For example, I finally ordered a Chicken Soup book on the subject of children with disabilites. I fully expect all the symptoms that come with me wanting to digest some chicken soup, fever, sweats, nausia and vomiting....I will let you know after it has been delivered.