Understanding Myself: A Kid's Guide to Intense Emotions and Strong Feelings [Hardcover]

Mary C. (Author), Ph.D. Lamia (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: November 15, 2010 | Age Range: 9 and up

Strong feelings and intense emotions are part of every pre-teens life. So why does something so common feel so overwhelming or embarrassing?

Understanding Myself is written especially for kids with intense emotions. Chock-full of current and relevant psychological research on emotions as well as real-life stories, useful quizzes and fun-fact boxes, Understanding Myself will encourage kids to notice just what their emotions are telling them about themselves, their friends, and their family.

This informative and practical guide will help kids know what do when their emotions get to be too much!

Product Details

• Age Range: 9 and up
  
• Hardcover: 112 pages
• Publisher: Magination Press; 1 edition (November 15, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1433808897
• ISBN-13: 978-1433808890
• Product Dimensions: 7.1 x 0.6 x 9.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 3.3 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (26 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #27,616 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Dr. Mary Lamia knows kids and knows how to talk directly to them...A valuable book for kids by a gifted psychologist which can truly help children better understand themselves." --Michael Krasny, Ph.D., Host, Forum, KQED Radio

"...you will see the way your emotions work in a new light." --Venezia Harrison, Age 12

"...an insightful, smart book that will definitely help preteens make sense of their emotions and develop their emotional intelligence...But if you're a parent, buy an extra copy for yourself." --Armin Brott, Host, Positive Parenting, KOIT

"...kids will get a lot out of this book!" --Katja Lohser, age 12

"This is a book that therapists and families would do well to have on their bookshelves as it supports the development of emotional intelligence in both the children and parents."-- Jean Rosenfeld, LCSW

"An accessible, engaging book for kids and parents, Understanding Myself offers a basic education for families in understanding, managing and discussing strong emotions and feelings. Its tone is respectful as it clearly defines and clarifies 18 feelings, laying out a basic emotional vocabulary. Although its stated audience is youth eight to 13 years old who are experiencing strong emotions, the book's straight forward information makes it also appropriate and useful for older teens, as well as parents who are struggling to understand their children's and their own feelings." --California Society for Clinical Social Work

About the Author

Mary C. Lamia, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst who works with adults, adolescents, and preteens in her Marin County private practice. She is a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, California.

Product Details

• Age Range: 9 and up
  
• Hardcover: 112 pages
• Publisher: Magination Press; 1 edition (November 15, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1433808897
• ISBN-13: 978-1433808890
• Product Dimensions: 7.1 x 0.6 x 9.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 3.3 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (26 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #27,616 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I'm a clinical psychologist in Marin County, California, and a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, California. Teaching the public about the psychology of human behavior has been something I've done for over 30 years. Please visit my website: http://www.marylamia.com

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

61 of 62 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars An Important Addition to the Discovery of Self for Young People January 5, 2011

By Grady Harp HALL OF FAMETOP 50 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback

UNDERSTANDING MYSELF: A Kid's guide to intense emotions and strong feelings' by Berkeley clinical psychologist/psychoanalyst Mary C. Lamia, PhD is a brave undertaking. As the adult reader takes the time to read this book the first reaction is that the information in the book may just be too advanced for the suggested age 8 to 13 category of young people. And there is a strong hint there that Dr. Lamia doesn't nee to make apparent: if this information seems too sensitive for kids then the adult reader needs some introspection and possible work on their own! Dr. Lamia takes on the field of emotions - that inner aspect of human behavior that in many ways determines juts how effective we will be in dealing with the world. She simply believes that if young people get an early start on appreciating those aspects of the mind that have little to do with school performance but MUCH to do with social interaction and self understanding, then the opening of the door to mental health as they mature will be a more informed process.

The book is divided into seven parts: Feeling Your Emotions in which the science of emotions (yes!) leads to definitions of moods, emotions, feelings; Felling Self-Conscious deals with the concepts of embarrassment, guilt, shame, and pride; Feeling Threatened discusses anxiety, fear and disgust; Feeling Gloomy addresses loneliness, sadness and grief; Feeling Elated explores excitement/joy/happiness and love/infatuation; and Felling Stormy explains anger and envy/jealousy. Each of these topics are first defined so that the reader hears from an expert just what those emotions really are, examples are given, tests are available, and Psych Notes are offered.... All of this information is dealt with in a warm supportive manner, bringing the young person up to speed with the terminology as well as the etiology and repercussions and benefits of understanding the beginnings of emotions and how comfortable to incorporate this knowledge in finding a happier path of living.

This book may be created for ages 8 through 13, but after reading UNDERSTANDING MYSELF cover to cover it seems to this reader that the book would well serve the high school and college student - as well as the adults among us who still remain in the dark about these important concepts. Look for this book to garner awards on many levels. It is published by the MAGINATION PRESS under the auspices of the American Psychological Association. That backing, as well as the personal impact of Dr. Lamia, should make this book a part of every family's library. Grady Harp, January 11 Read more ›

33 of 37 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars UNDERSTANDING MYSELF November 29, 2010

By alyson

Format:Hardcover

UNDERSTANDING MYSELF is such a lovely book with wonderfully comprehensive explanations about feelings. I found the Psych notes and chapter quizzes to be interesting and helpful. As a Clinical Psychology doctoral student and elementary school counselor (in training), this serves as a wonderful tool in my work with elementary school children. As a former teacher, I believe that many parents, children, therapists, and teachers, will find this book to be quite helpful and valuable.

23 of 27 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Interview with author December 8, 2010

By E. C. Lowgren

Format:Hardcover

I heard an interview with this author 12/7/10 on KQED radio's Forum with Michael Krasney reviewing this book. If the book is anything like the interview with the author, then I think it will be a useful tool for all ages. She says the book was written for children ages 8-13, but parents should find it helpful too. The author emphasized that getting kids to be aware of their emotions, especially shame and guilt, can help them cope with tough problems like bullies and family tension. The interview has streaming audio so you can hear her for yourself!

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Understanding Myself is a book designed for children, but it can be enjoyed by everyone. January 6, 2011

By Robert G Yokoyama VINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback

Understanding Myself is a book that designed for children from age eight to thirteen. It is a book that provides tips to help children to handle intense feelings like anger, loneliness and guilt. Each page of this book is colored differently. This adds to the appeal of the book for me. Every person experiences these feelings, so the information in this book can apply to everyone.

I like reading the psych notes in the book. This book is published by the American Psychological Association. It is filled with psychological research studies that are fun to read and understand. My perception of negative feelings like envy, guilt and embarassment has changed after reading this book. The challenge for me is to take these feelings I have and use them to create positive outcomes for myself.

Dr. Lamia includes self assessments after each chapter. These assessments are a good way for children to gauge how to improve on expressing feelings like anger and fear more effectively. I had fun taking these assessments mentally to see how I measure up. Understanding Myself is an insightful book that will help people of all ages learn how to deal with feelings more effectively.

11 of 13 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars This exceptional book is an excellent resource for the `tween or teen who is experiencing normal emotional angst ... January 14, 2011

By D. Fowler TOP 50 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover

Young people experience a range of emotions and oftentimes feel they are on an emotional rollercoaster, one that sometimes doesn't seem to end. Of course you've probably heard the expressions, "mad as a hornet" or "as happy as a clam." These are well known clichés, but in reality everyone experiences "intense emotions and strong feelings." It's an enormously difficult task to sort out strong feelings and even more difficult to understand them. Unfortunately, some `tweens and teens can feel quite isolated when they cannot differentiate between normal feelings and those that may be indicative of mental illness. It's a rare person who has not asked themselves, "Am I nuts or what?" The answer to that one is probably not.

Say for example your best friend just announced that they are moving away. Most normal people would feel very sad, "an emotion that you might have in response to loss or disappointment." (p. 71) Hey, it's not a comfortable emotion to experience, but it's not a nutty one. This book also will help `tweens and teens sort out things like the difference between things like sadness and depression in order to put things in perspective. It explains that we all have what has been dubbed an "appraisal system," a system that "sizes up a situation and triggers and emotional response." (p. 59) By reading this book young people will learn what makes them tick and will learn why they experience strong emotions such as embarrassment, guilt, shame, pride, anxiety, fear, disgust, loneliness, sadness, grief, excitement, joy, happiness, love, infatuation, anger, envy, and jealousy....

The bare bones objective of this book is to "help you understand what triggers certain emotions, the feelings, and thoughts they create, and what you can do when it seems as though they're just too much to handle." (p. 5) Some kids are able to ask their parents, caretakers, or teachers questions they might have about certain feelings they may be experiencing, while others find it enormously difficult. If you are this person or know a youngster like this you've definitely come to the right place. In this book you'll learn about the "science" of emotions and why we have them, the qualities of emotions, how you can deal with overwhelming situations, how and why we can sometimes misinterpret emotions, the difference between moods and feelings, you'll learn about different cultural "rules" for social expression, how individuals interpret emotions, what self-conscious emotions are, why we blush, why certain negative emotions actually help us, and you'll learn many other fascinating things you may never have known about yourself and your emotions.

This exceptional book is an excellent resource for the `tween or teen who is experiencing normal emotional angst. The text is thoroughly grounded in reality and is very well written and researched. It does not dumb down the topic, but rather speaks directly to the young audience. There are many different, but equally important topics that all of us encounter at one point or another. This is most definitely a book that tells the reader that they are most likely no different from the next person and it offers a feeling of well being throughout the book without being condescending. Take for example the chapter on grief, one section in particular that was quite impressive in that it did not minimize the emotion and also included the loss of a pet. It stated that "Grief is an emotion of very intense sadness that you experience in response to the loss of someone you love or something that is highly treasured." And it also realistically stated that "you're not going to totally get over it because that's impossible." (p. 77-78). There are sidebars that include thoughts by young people, quizzes, and "Psych Notes" that candidly discuss the topic. This is a superlative choice that would be an excellent read and discuss book in the homeschool or classroom setting. If you're thinking of adding it to your shelves, you'll have a timeless resource on how to deal with those not so cool, confusing emotions `tweens and teens don't always understand!

This book courtesy of Magination Press in exchange for an honest review. Read more ›