Customer Reviews

Understanding the Tin Man: Why So Many Men Avoid Intimacy

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

Mr. July picks up in "Understanding the Tin Man," where he so insightfully left off in "Brothers, Lust, and Love." I am definitely impressed with the author and his latest work. It is evident that Mr. July has personally experienced that of which he writes. He reveals the most intimate details of how and why so many men avoid intimacy, with the opportunity for self checks and "Things to Think About" at the end of each chapter. He also provides the opportunity for both sexes to take a closer look at their significant other and themselves. Mr. July's manner and approach with the two are down to earth and encouraging. His style of writing leaves the impression of having shared an intimate conversation and/or discussion with one's closest friend... as in no demands as to what one should do, but leaving the door open for positive and new realizations about one's self and way of being.

"Understanding the Tin Man" is a refreshing read. It encourages and promotes a realistic understanding of the various "Tin" issues between the sexes. Though the title and subheading suggest a read geared toward women, the book is a definite must read for men too. It includes helpful references and positive messages for them throughout, and offers ideal ways to better or begin to make self-imposed changes that encourage a stronger love of self, family, and friends. This book is definitely a "five" star, plus.

I can't begin to say how magnificent this book is. It touched the core of my spirit. I give it all praises. July has really opened up to women about men, giving them understanding and guidance when it comes to men and relationships with women. Very insightful: a realization I came to in my thirties.

Women spend so much of their time, effort and energy on men, trying to change them, and make them understand us, but how can any success be achieved if we as women do not understand manhood. It is by far the best book, and the best book for the spirit to tap into a man's emotions, his spirit. Trust me, if you read the info, and learn from it, it will help the woman understand the man, and herself. I give it ten stars.

I read a lot of self-help books, even those not pertinent to me. This was one of the better ones I have read. William July knows how to write a compelling non-fiction book. He has the right combination between facts and anecdotes. His ideas about the 'Tin Man' are not unique, but since he used such a catchy title, I'm sure his version will be remembered more than others.
The main drawback of this book, if you're reading it to improve your life, is that it doesn't provide many step-by-step directions for opening communication with a Tin Man, or with trying to help yourself if you are one. It presents the problem, and then kind of drifts off with a "Uh, so go see a therapist..." non-answer. He provided (in the hardback version) suggestions for a panel discussion, but realistically, how many people have the opportunity or desire to invite celebrities over to discuss this? Also, his definition of a "Tin Man" is so broad, it includes even sensitive New Age guys with a hint of manliness.
If you're a man who has problems with intimacy and want to over come your issues, see a therapist instead of reading this book. If you like self-help books and want an introduction to overly-macho guys, this is a good read.

I got this book at a time that I was separated from my boyfriend. This book helped me understand why some men behave the way they do and why it is so hard for them to come to grips with themselves sometimes. Every woman and man should have a copy of this book,it is great! .

I couldn't put the book down! it was so informative and on point. I would highly reccomended this book to both men and women. I particularly liked the chapter entitled "Tin Speak" Hmmm.. so that's what it's called (smile)Thanx W.J for another great book keep up the good work.. :-)

Tin Man attempts to explain why men have problems with intimacy and commitment. I think a more appropriate title should have been Tin People since a number of the chapters are written specifically to identify character traits of Tin Women. With that said, I have to be completely honest in that I didn't find anything revealing or new in this offering to explain why men behave the way they do. July points to many obvious social stereotypes to identify the antecedents of Tin behavior; for instance, young skilled athletes on the playground rally their popularity into Tin Man psychosis as an adult, as well as numbers of female sexual partners equals Tin Man achievement. On a more humorous side (or at least I thought so), July explains the many ways Tin Men breakup relationships (e.g., "It's not you baby, it's me", or "I don't know where I'm going with my life now".) I found it funny in the fact that both men and women use the same excuses and not exclusive to just men. Moreover, we've all heard them before so why do we have to be reminded? In short, it was very general.

I thought this book was a good draft. I say this in the sense that July failed to touch upon the deeper meaning behind the reasons men feel the fear of commitment. I believe there should have been more research and interviews; more first hand accounts from a broad spectrum of economic and social backgrounds.

I so wish I had this information BEFORE I got married. I would have been
better equipped to pick a more suitable life partner. This book extremely
helpful for the woman who desires to understand why her husband/partner
is emotionally unavailable and it is a must have for the man who desires
to change.

I have bought this book atleast 7 times b/c I always end up giving it away. We heard the author on the radio station one Saturday and my boyfriend and I decided to read the book. I have to admit that it is not just about TIN Men but about TIN Women and the Women that date TIN Men (and why they don't help him change). All I can say is this is a must read!

Mr. July picks up in "Understanding the Tin Man," where he so insightfully left off in "Brothers, Lust, and Love." I am definitely impressed with the author and his latest work. It is evident that Mr. July has personally experienced that of which he writes. He reveals the most intimate details of how and why so many men avoid intimacy, with the opportunity for self checks and "Things to Think About" at the end of each chapter. He also provides the opportunity for both sexes to take a closer look at their significant other and themselves. Mr. July's manner and approach with the two is down to earth and encouraging. His style of writing leaves the impression of having shared an intimate conversation and/or discussion with one's closest friend... as in no demands as to what one should do, but leaving the door open for positive and new realizations about one's self and way of being.

"Understanding the Tin Man" is a refreshing read. It encourages and promotes a realistic understanding of the various "Tin" issues between the sexes. Though the title and sub-heading suggests a read geared toward females, the book is a definite must read for men. It includes helpful references and positive messages for them throughout, and offers ideal ways to better or begin to make self-imposed changes that encourage a stronger love of self, family, and friends. Enjoy the read!

I waited with baited breath for Mr July's second look at our brothers,after his first triumph with "Brothers, lust and Love".I needed an explanation as to why they seem to almost repel our love at times. Once again, I wasn't dissapointed. Thoughtful and honest insight is what the reader finds in this work, and it also turns the line of questioning at us women as well. Never a blame game, Mr July is a talented and insighful brother who has graciously shared his lessons with us. Now, if only more brothers would pick up this book, I think our community might finally start loving each other as we should. Only sorry I missed the book tour!