Unmarried to Each Other: The Essential Guide to Living Together as an Unmarried Couple [Paperback]

Dorian Solot (Author), Marshall Miller (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: November 14, 2002

Unmarried to Each Other is a smart, practical guide for unmarried couples, based on the more than 100 stories and real-life experiences of unmarried partners around the country. This book was written by a couple who, themselves, are in a committed nine-year unmarried relationship. For people who are unmarried now or forever, the book is filled with information about the joys and the common challenges to love without wedding rings, including answers to questions like: Is living together right for us? How can we explain our relationship to our grandmothers? How can I get my workplace to provide health benefits to my domestic partner? Are there problems for couples who have kids without being married? How can we plan a wedding or ceremony without getting legally married? Filled with dozens of funny, real-life stories and savvy insights, Unmarried to Each Other is the definitive resource for couples bound by love, if not by marriage, for one of the fastest-growing household types in the U.S. today.

Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Although these books examine the ins and outs of cohabitation from different viewpoints, they do agree on some basics: cohabitation is on the rise (there are 11 million cohabitors in this country today, claim Solot and Miller), and six out of ten couples live together before marriage (claim the Whitmans). Strangely enough, not many self-help manuals on the subject exist. Founders of the Alternatives to Marriage Project, Solot and Miller are a committed unmarried couple, and their book reflects this perspective. Although they acknowledge that many couples live together as a step before marriage, they are most concerned with couples who are planning to live together instead of getting married. They cover topics such as reasons why couples would decide not to get married, how unmarried couples can legally protect themselves, and how to agitate for acceptance of unmarried lifestyles. Stacy Whitman, a journalist currently living with her fianc , and her sister, lawyer Wynne Whitman, have a different focus. While they recognize that some couples might decide to live together ad infinitum, their advice pertains to couples for whom the wedding bells will eventually toll. They address many of the same areas as Solot and Miller, such as legal protection and how to deal with negative reactions from family and friends, but they also include advice on what to do if one member is not willing to tie the knot. Given the dearth of books on cohabitation, either of these would make great additions to public libraries. Also consider Ralph Warner and others' Living Together: A Legal Guide for Unmarried Couples, endorsed by the authors here.
Pam Matthews, M.L.S., Olmsted Falls, OH
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Review

A must-read for anyone wanting to shack up .... this thoughtful, practical book ... offers guidance and questions to ponder. -- Utne Reader, September-October 2003

A thoughtful, no-nonsense resource for unwed partners both gay and straight...a unique and invaluable resource for the happily unwed. -- Bitch: Feminist Response to Pop Culture, No. 20, 2003

Fantastic work...[Unmarried to Each Other's] warm style is such that it can be read "cover-to-cover," like a novel. -- The Texas Triangle, January 10, 2003

They've written the guidebook, and it's a triumph. ...Contains just about everything cohabs (and prospective cohabs) need to know. -- Free Inquiry, Spring 2003

Top-notch collection of advice for couples who want to keep their relationship strong -- with or without a marriage license. -- Minneapolis Star-Tribune, January 13, 2003

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Product Details

• Paperback: 302 pages
• Publisher: Da Capo Press (November 14, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1569245665
• ISBN-13: 978-1569245668
• Product Dimensions: 8.7 x 7 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #89,705 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

25 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Everything you need to know..., June 26, 2003

By A Customer

This review is from: Unmarried to Each Other: The Essential Guide to Living Together as an Unmarried Couple (Paperback)

This book really opened my eyes. My boyfriend and I have lived together for 3 years, and I couldn't understand why he didn't want to get married right away. I found this book, and it really helped me understand his perspective. The book is very helpful. Each chapter is very informative. The book includes how to answer questions about your relationship, important legal issues, and a guide that tells you how to do something whether you are married or unmarried (i.e., changing your name, custody of children, etc.) A good read for any couple - living together or not, considering marriage or not, same-sex or different-sex couples.

22 of 23 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Part of a good combination, August 29, 2003

By 

T. Blikre "tblik" (Redmond, WA United States) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Unmarried to Each Other: The Essential Guide to Living Together as an Unmarried Couple (Paperback)

Pair this with "Living Together- A Legal Guide for Unmarried Couples" and you have a great resource. "Unmarried Together" is excellent in addressing the social and emotional aspects of living together, but is light on the legal angles. Considering the scope of the book, this is unavoidable. It's difficult to cover laws in all US states let alone other countries.

24 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Book on Relationship Alternatives, May 5, 2003

By A Customer

This review is from: Unmarried to Each Other: The Essential Guide to Living Together as an Unmarried Couple (Paperback)

I was half way finished with this book, when I realized how thankful I was for the intelligent perspective and reporting of this alternative lifestyle. I have been in an unmarried relationship for twelve years. We have attempted the engagement and planning of a wedding twice. Both times the decision was made to call it off.This book helps me understand and accept our unconventional relationship and the reality that marriage may not be in our future. It helped me tremendously with the anger, sadness, and disappointment associated with the decision not to marry. Thank you to the authors for tackling this topic with humor, insight, and a lot of great information!