Customer Reviews

Unseen Evil [VHS]

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(5)
1 star:		(19)

 

 

I bought this dvd cause the cover's alien was extremely similar to the alien in the original Alien movies. BIG MISTAKE. L.Lamas was in this movie for may be 10 mins. tops. The Alien is nothing like the photo on the cover and it, of course is nothing like the Alien movies. The cover said a "new breed of predator" This movie is the stupidist movie I have ever seen. IT IS THE BIGGEST WASTE OF MY MONEY AND MY TIME. !!! If there was a way to do it - I would rate it in the minus ( - ) instead of the + column ...SO DO NOT BUY THIS PIECE OF GARBAGE...

This is the kind of movie you watch and think... I can't believe people actually put time and money into this movie... certainly there is no talent. Even more unbelievable is that it was ever picked up and released...Wow... slap a good lookin alien on the cover and hope for the best... Avoid this waiste of time and ...... well time

this movie seriously stinks, spend 90 minutes of your life doing something else, riding your bike or reading a book, even listening to Clay Aiken or Celine Dion is more pleasurable. First this movie has no connection with the "Alien" movies. The story makes little sense, the alien is about as scary as anyone on the WWE. The actors go from intense overacting (the Phoebe character esp.) to not acting at all (Lorenzo Lamas and anyone in the OPI). The only redeeming portion of the movie is the beginning there is actually some nudity that is interesting, but it goes downhill as soon as they enter the cave and find the treasure. I found myself watching it with spanish subtitles to justify wasting my time on it (I was at least keeping up with my spanish). If I had to choose between this movie and having to stand in leech infested water, I would choose the leeches

I thought that there isn't a movie out there that can make me truly hate it so much that I can get off my seat and leave. But this movie did. Within the first 15 minutes of bad acting, cheesy gore, very bad CGI and crappy dialogue I couldn't continue watching it. It is the worst movie I have ever seen, and I thought nothing would change my opinion after M. Night's Signs. But it did. Don't waste your 5 bucks renting it.

Had I known he was this hard up I would have sent him twenty bucks.

Halfway through this horrendous clunker, you may realize it's actually a sequel to the equally bad UNSEEN EVIL. (I had the misfortune of seeing that one, too, so I knew when the flashbacks occurred, I was in for trouble). Lorenzo Lamas, looking seriously bored and only in the movie for about 10 minutes, is pretty bad, but the rest of the cast is worse. The effects are some of the worst I've seen recently and the screenwriter is one of those who thinks that every character must have at least three profanities in his dialogue. You may recognize Priscilla Barnes as the mysterious doctor, and you may wonder if she wants you to recognize her! The movie is filled with unlikeable characters and the few good ones are offed. Nothing like the cover suggests, so beware dear viewer!

Cause it's absolutely freaking hilarious. Me and my friends have a favorite past time, and that is to find the worst movies ever made and make fun of them (a-la mystery science theater 300). Many times we thought we had found the one true king of cinema crap (Carnosaur 4, The Thing Below, House of the Dead, Anonymous Rex, the list goes on)...until we found this movie. It is the proverbial gold mine, the cave of wonders for those looking to laugh at everything a movie should never be. From the script, to the camera work (you can't even call it cinematography) to the acting, to the plot, to the...special effects???...try and watch this movie and not laugh aloud at every scene, the ending is preciously hysterical. I swear to you, this movie is totally worth 5 bucks simply for it's sheet comic value.

I have to say that enjoying this type of movie requires an enquired taste. I have seen many types of films in my day, from Hollywood, mainstream, independent, low budget or whatever. As a matter of fact in my college days I used to make movies (not those types of movies) and did freelanced work with film/video. Therefore I feel I am able to appreciate a good movie or a bad movie. Please don't mistake me, just because I use to work with video/film doesn't mean I have a better taste than others, this is just my excuse for loving schlock. :)

With this introduction taken into consideration, I have to say that "Alien 3000" is so bad that it is awesome. To say the acting is terrible is an understatement, the story is awful and has the continuity problems to prove it; the special effects are brought to you in part by Xbox and/or Kmart Halloween costumes. In other words, if you want to watch an "Alien" or "Predator" movie, then just watch an "Alien" or "Predator" movie. Nevertheless I feel that "Alien 3000" was much more entertaining that "Alien vs. Predator".

The plot is simple a woman named Kate (Megan Malloy) is in a mental institution after witnessing everyone from her camping group killed by an "unknown" being. I must say that Megan Malloy is really attractive, sadly her looks don't bleed over into her performance. The mental institution looks like it was filmed in an extra room at an elementary school. I digress, the military need Kate to track down this "unknown" being. This leads to a motley crew of Special Forces to track down the "unknown" being A.K.A "Alien". One of the Special Forces team members is this Goth-type girl with a potty mouth who looks a lot like a girl I use to date. As for the other team members, well if the United States had to recruit this group to pour a glass of milk we are all doomed.

The vast majority of this movie takes place in the woods and/or mountains, so already the production budget of this movie is being saved. The "Alien" is really fake looking, man it is so bad. Also the "Alien" has loot and/or gold if you take it then you have already signed your death certificate. This gold-death conduit is never really explained.

Anyway, there is plenty of blood, guts, screaming, bad acting, dummies, more dummies, exploding body parts, toy helicopters, dummies, fake bats, CGI that mirrors Xbox and oh yeah dummies. I was laughing so hard during this movie I couldn't stand it. I found myself rewinding stuff just to crack myself up. This movie was non-stop cheese that was either Gorgonzola or Havarti, I still can't decide.

This movie also features Lorenzo Lamas, who seems sedated in his 12 minute part as a solider, Priscilla Barnes (the third blonde from "Three's Company") plays a doctor and Scott Schwartz (the kid from "The Toy" and my personal favorite "Raiders of the Living Dead") has a small part.

The only special feature is a gallery of trailers/previews, yet the trailer/preview for "Alien 3000" isn't presented. Then there is a mock interview with the "Alien" about his part in this movie. The "Alien" is just a guy wearing a mask, pretty lame.

This movie has received some pretty low ratings in this forum. I totally understand why, this movie was a shoddy attempt at a sci-fi and/or horror movie. This movie plays more as a comedy than a horror or sci-fi movie. So don't let the cover of the movie seduce you, it isn't a great movie. However, I lowered my expectations (way down) when I watched this movie and I loved it. In conclusion, if you walk into an Outback Steakhouse and get a steak you aren't going to be surprised. I knew what I was going to get from "Alien 3000" and that is why I enjoyed it.

Horrible, a definte C movie! Lorenzo Lamas must really be desperate for work! The alien is so fake looking and the action scenes are totaly fake looking! The only thing that was decent is the killing, it is real graphic! The acting really sucks in it! If you like gore than get this movie for a good laugh!

A group of archaeological students ventures into the woods to find an ancient indian burial ground. Once they find it, their teacher (played by Richard Hatch) decides to steal the treasure that's hidden inside. Unwittingly, the team releases an invisible monster that starts hunting the students and killlling them one by one until the treasure is returned.

A very B-grade movie with a bad script, lots of overacting, and a comupter-generated creature that is so two-dimensional in appearance that even the creature from "Alien" would be laughing hysterically. And, like with any B-movie, you alternately groan and laugh at the screen albeit unintentionally. Tim Thomerson is good as the park ranger and the scenes involving attacks by the creature are done fairly well. But, the ending makes no sense though the effects are okay.

DVD picture and sound quailty are just okay, and there are no extras. Get this film if you enjoy Mystery Science Theater 3000 because they would have a field day with this film!!!