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This empathetic self-help book argues that when couples find out that they can't have a baby, they're inflicted with an "unacknowledged trauma that leaves them feeling not only frustrated and angry, but sad, frightened, confused, guilty, overwhelmed and out of control." Having found little support for their own struggles with infertility trauma, Jaffe and the Diamonds (all clinical psychologists) co-founded The Center for Reproductive Psychology in San Diego, Calif. Here they sympathetically cover the core psychological issues of the matter, including the initial shock and denial, the persistent feelings of not being "healthy" or "normal," the relationship problems, the loss of sexual privacy, the grief and the belief that you're not really an adult until you have a child. Using their own and their patients' experiences, the authors offer many approaches to these problems: journaling, talking about infertility with your partner, practicing rituals to validate the losses, incorporating structure into your daily life and seeking out support groups and therapy. But the most important step, they say, is to recognize infertility for the trauma that it is. "Your losses are real," they explain. "Infertility does not merely represent a recent failed pregnancy, but a whole lifetime of dreams, hopes and plans that have gone horribly awry." One in ten adults of reproductive age is affected by infertility. For them, and for the friends and professionals who want to help them, this book provides compassionate insight into infertility's often unacknowledged ramifications.
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Must reading for the thousands of people struggling with the pain of infertility. (Christiane Northrup, M.D.)
I would HIGHLY recommend this book as required reading for anyone with infertility, all who work with infertility, as well as the families of persons with infertility. (Marjut Herzog, President of RESOLVE, South Florida)
A new, creative approach that avoids psychological and medical jargon and makes the issues accessible to any reader. (Miriam Tasini, Professor of Psychiatry, UCLA Medical School)
I love how this was written from a psychology perspective. This book contains a lot of truths and good points I'd never really thought about before, such as your reproductive... Read morePublished 8 months ago by Emily
This book is wonderfully thorough and helpful for those going through infertility. It really helps to be validated that one is not going crazy when emotions are so intense, varied,... Read morePublished 15 months ago by Karen Hernandez
I am a mother,step mother and nurse in my 50s who thought I knew infertility.I didn't until my step daughter who is infertile ask me to read this.What an eye opener. Read morePublished on August 15, 2013 by trish
I never write reviews but the impact this book has had on my marriage and our battle with infertility was worth sharing. Read morePublished on August 4, 2013 by Joi Braswell
This book served my needs and helped edify my feelings. I highly recommend it if you are currently experiencing these issues.Published on June 14, 2013 by Michelle
This was an incredibly encouraging read for me. Currently in our 20th month trying to conceive and having gone through treatments, heartbreak, frustration, anger, etc. Read morePublished on June 9, 2013 by Jenna
The book was wonderful in that it helps those going through fertility problems to know they are not alone and that their feelings are normal. Read morePublished on October 23, 2011 by Diana Kay Estill