Us: A User's Guide [Paperback]

Dan Tocchini (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 1, 2010

Daniel Tocchini shows how some basic changes in marital “conversation”—the way couples talk to themselves and each other—can literally transform relationships.

 

Veteran marriage coach Daniel L. Tocchini doesn’t want to improve marriages. He wants to transform them. Drawing on personal experience and stories from couples he has coached, he offers practical guidance to move couples beyond communication tricks and gimmicks to help them truly understand "Us" for the first time—talking honestly, listening generously, tackling tricky issues, breaking out of ruts, and abandoning self-centered “consumer thinking.” Innovative, insightful, and thoroughly biblical, Tocchini’s approach has helped thousands in his popular seminars. Whether a marriage is in deep trouble or just coasting along, it's time for Christian couples to read the User's Guide that God intended.

Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

Daniel Tocchini doesn’t want to improve your marriage. He wants to transform it. Or, rather, to show how some simple changes in your marital conversation—the way you talk to yourself and each other—can open your relationship up to God’s transforming power.

 

Drawing on his personal experience and stories of couples he has coached, Tocchini offers a wealth of practical guidance to help you learn to live your marriage “in the light”—talking honestly, listening generously, confronting tricky issues, tuning in to each other’s needs and yearnings, and breaking free of the self-centered “consumer thinking” that infects us all. Innovative, insightful, and thoroughly biblical, Tocchini’s approach has helped thousands in his popular seminars. Whether your marriage is in deep trouble or just coasting along, you’ll be amazed at what happens when you finally read the User's Guide that God intended.

About the Author

Daniel L. Tocchini and his wife, Aileen, are founders of several “transformational training” organizations. They have helped thousands of couples through personal marriage coaching and their innovative marriage seminars.  He lives with his family in California.

Product Details

• Paperback: 208 pages
• Publisher: David C. Cook; New edition (January 1, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1434764737
• ISBN-13: 978-1434764737
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.5 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,176,071 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A Valuable Marriage Resource for Communication, December 25, 2009

By 

Stacey (Las Vegas, NV USA) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)   

This review is from: Us: A User's Guide (Paperback)

Daniel Tocchini's "Us: A User's Guide" is a vivid and very frank non-fiction work designed to spark conversation between men and women who are willing to make an effort to remain a couple. There were moments while reading this book, when I wanted to close my eyes and cover my ears and yell, "TMI!" But Tocchini's honesty and the frankness of the subjects that he showcases in this book are insightful and inspiring. The detail about the relationship that each case subject pair reveals isn't so graphic as to be inappropriate, but rather shows the issues in the marriage that needed to be addressed.

This book is not just for couples in trouble. Healthy marriages can benefit from this reading, as well. Some may call it a dose of prevention to discuss these topics, others may use this book to appreciate their spouse and come to an understanding that we need to put our partner first more than we do. "Us" is loaded with scripture, which is absolutely crucial if you want a Biblical marriage. This is one book that I am glad to be reading. I know it will improve my attitude, lead me to the Word of God, and help to improve my own marriage relationship.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Refreshingly substantive - a gift!, January 5, 2010

By 

Dane Sanders "Author of Fast Track Photographer" (Newport Beach, CA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Us: A User's Guide (Paperback)

In a sea of well-intentioned band-aid books for marriages, Us stands out as refreshingly substantive and remarkably void of formulaic suggestions. What makes Dan Tocchini's work special however isn't just the book's integrity or depth, but its accessibility: He offers regular people like you and me real help to transform our marriages and our lives.

Do your most significant commitment a favor and get after this book today.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A wonderful marriage resource - practical, easy to read and full of insight, January 20, 2010

By 

Crystal Fulcher (Beaufort, NC United States) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Us: A User's Guide (Paperback)

When I started reading Us, I didn't know what to expect. To me the title alone promises big things and I think this book delivers. I had read a few chapters and already felt myself putting some of the things into practice. In fact I was stomping around angry at my husband last night for something I thought he did, then I read a chapter of us and realized I was assuming he did it and I was assuming I kinew his motivation, when truthfully I did not. This is a big no-no and one of the habits that I need to change. Now my marriage is actual good - I mean we have our moments, but I think Us can really help us get closer and get closer to God.

Daniel Tocchini writing is easy to understand. He gives the habit or point he is talking about in the chapter, backs it up with Bible teaching and then usually uses a story from a couple who had this problem and worked through it. The chapters have really hit home with me and I see ways I can make a good marriage wonderful and keep it that way for our lives. And as the author points out - this is good for all involved, husband, wife and family.

The answers aren't all easy - they will take time to put into place but I think if I do a little at a time to try and change my thinking, this book can really help improve our marriage. And it's not a dry marriage manual - it was actually hard to put down - I kept wanting to learn more and more about what Daniel himself has learned.

The book is put together well and whether your marriage is struggling a little or a lot, whether you are just married or married for 25 years, whether your blissfullly happy or not, all married couples and couples contemplating marriage can use this book.