Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs (Glory St. Claire, Book 5) [Mass Market Paperback]

Gerry Bartlett (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: February 2, 2010

Glory St. Clair loves soaking up Hollywood's vampire nightlife with her sexy Scottish lover, Jeremiah. Especially when she meets a vampire/ diet guru who promises to give her the body she's wanted for centuries. One problem: his clan and Jeremiah's are ancient enemies. But Glory's not about to let a stupid family feud come between her and slender bliss. Yet, she can't help but wonder...how much is she willing to risk for her hips? And how much (and precisely what) is she willing to lose?

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Laugh-out-loud fun.... Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs has a reserved spot on my keeper shelf!"--Fresh Fiction
"There is a little something for every reader in this story: sex, laugher, romance and surprise ending that leaves you wanting more."--The Romance Readers Connection

From the Author

As soon as I added rocker Israel Caine, I knew I had to get Glory to the Grammys in Hollywood. But how would she fare on the red carpet? With her figure flaws? In Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs we meet Ian MacDonald, an ancient enemy of Jeremy Blade's, and a genius when it comes to drugs for vampires. Guess what? He has created a diet drug that can make Glory lose weight. Oh, yeah. But you don't think it comes without a high price, do you? And it's not just dollars and cents. Brace yourself, Glory's trip to Hollywood is a bumpy ride.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Reading level: Ages 18 and up
  
• Mass Market Paperback: 352 pages
• Publisher: Berkley Trade; Original edition (February 2, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0425232239
• ISBN-13: 978-0425232231
• Product Dimensions: 8 x 5.1 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #742,197 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Gerry Bartlett lives in Texas, halfway between Houston and Galveston. Her antique business on the historic Strand on the island is open again after it went under eight feet of water during Hurricane Ike. When she's not treasure hunting for the store, she loves heading to the Texas capitol of Austin where she imagines her vampire Glory St.Clair of the Real Vampire series has her own antique business and vintage clothing shop. You can read more about Gerry and her series at gerrybartlett.com and find links to her fan sites there. She's shown here in her back yard with dog Jet, a whippet. He's her alarm clock and literary muse, keeping her company when she's at the computer. Gerry loves to hear from readers and you can reach her from her web site or by snail mail at P.O. Box 101, League City, TX 77574-0101. She previously wrote as Lynn McKay and you might find her Regency historical available on Amazon too.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars What would you be willing to sacrifice to loose weight? Chocolate? Sugar? Carbs? Your lover? Your life?, February 2, 2010

By 

Terri Richison (Houston, TX United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs (Glory St. Claire, Book 5) (Mass Market Paperback)

For vampire Glory St. Clare weight loss has never been an option, since vampires go through all eternity with the exact same body they had on the day they were changed. Work-out, starve yourself, get a tattoo, a piercing - doesn't matter - one night of healing sleep and you're back to the exact body you started with.

Four hundred years ago, when her on-again/off-again boyfriend Jeremiah (Blade) Campbell III turned her vampire, Glory's voluptuous body was ideal for that time - fast forward to the 21st century and now she's slightly cubby. And that's bad enough when you are running a vintage dress shop in Austin, Texas, but in Hollywood Glory can't help but feel self-conscious of her size twelve body in a size zero world.

Newly turned vampire, rock star Israel Caine (Ray to his friends), was literally dumped on Glory's doorstep and she became his mentor, teaching him how to survive his new `life'. Soon the tabloids link Ray and Glory together and to defuse the gossip they pretend to be engaged. Ray has been nominated for a Grammy award and Glory accompanies him to Hollywood to walk the red carpet at his side. Of course, the tabloids are having a field day making fun of Ray's fat fiancée.

Enjoying the active Hollywood nightlife, Glory learns of a new weight loss drug for vampires. In spite of the astronomical expense, she starts taking the drug. The very first night, Glory wakes before sunset and, if not for the intervention of her body guard, she would have fried in the sun's rays. Unfortunately, there are even more potentially fatal side effects.

Blade insists Glory stop taking the drug because its inventor is a MacDonald and the MacDonalds and Campbells have been feuding for centuries. Blade is certain Glory is being used as a tool in the MacDonald/Campbell feud.

But, the pounds are coming off and the Grammy's are just a few days away...

Will Ray win the Grammy? Will the feud between the Campbells and MacDonalds finally erupt in the war to end all wars? Will Glory live long enough to find out?

If you are new to the REAL VAMPIRE series, witty dialogue, fascinating adventures and a captivating cast of characters are just a few of the reasons all five books are must reads! Each stands alone, but read one and you'll be hooked.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Don't Diet or Hate Their Thighs? Which is It?, April 23, 2010

By 

Barbara Sharpe (Kalamazoo, Michigan) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs (Glory St. Claire, Book 5) (Mass Market Paperback)

I've enjoyed this series for the most part. Glory is an interesting woman, aside from being a vampire. She has the same sort of troubles the average American woman has - romantic problems, money problems, career problems. The ususal.

Having said that, I was disappointed with this book. There is the obvious: why do we have to have a diet book? Real Vampires Don't Diet! Aside from that, I didn't think the characters felt "real" the way they have in the past. I just didn't buy Glory's willingness to do "anything it took" to be thin. I can see other women doing that, but it didn't feel like Glory to me.

On the other hand, the family feud subplot was interesting and I will be interested in seeing how that plays out in future books.

If you're already a Glory fan, you might as well pick this up. If you're new to the series, begin at the beginning!

5.0 out of 5 stars So Addictive, September 19, 2011

By 

Amanda - See all my reviews

This review is from: Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs (Glory St. Claire, Book 5) (Paperback)

All I want to say, Is this series is totally addictive! I have completely fallen in love with the characters and the story lines. Gerry Bartlett is a complete genius! Keep them comming Gerry!