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21 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
This book really is cool for people with mental problems, December 12, 2002
I have Fibromyalgia and Chronic Depression and am filing for Total Disability. I once made over $100,000.00 per year - now, I barely manage to function.I was shopping for a self help book because I have always had problems with the question "Who am I?" In fact, the first question my new church councelor asked me is "Do you know who you are?" My husband always told me to define myself by what I do; what I am able to produce. When I became sick with Fibro, I could only work (and do that at an extreme cost to my health) and my housework, being a good mother and wife went by the wayside. Then I couldn't even work, I was too sick. I quickly saw that defining myself by what I do/produce is not a true way to answer "Who am I" because if production defines a person, then I am already dead. As long as you are healthy and able to do things, you can try to convince yourself that is the answer, however, the moment you can't perform, you have just destroyed your own self worth. My therapist tried to ask questions like "Are you kind?" to help me develop self-worth. For her, if you had good morals and were patient, kind, have self-control, etc, then that should give you self worth. Although I tried to be, I was not always kind (sometime I had road rage, sometimes I was impatient waiting in line when I was in a hurry, sometimes I over ate). Sometimes I was kind because of ulterior motives such as "this will help me sale this idea to my boss", "this will help me...". So I could quickly see that basing "who am I" on a relative system that constantly changed versus and absolute system was doomed. This book tells you who you are. In fact, I took the scripures the author uses for "Who are You?"; "I am Significant"; and "I am secure" and typed them out in the new Message Bible. Now each morning, I read and pray these scriptures and my life is slowly but surely changing. Now, "Who am I" doesn't revolve around who everyone else says I am but who God says I am. I recently underwent a visualization therapy where we were listening to ocean sounds and a therapist was taking the group through relaxation techniques (relax your toes, feel the muscles of your feet relax, etc) then he said, "I want you to go back to a time where you felt safe and secure". I started searching for that time through my childhood, teens, early marriage, young children, teen children, and now empty nest and I couldn't think of one time I felf safe and secure. I started to panic when I asked God to help me remember. Then I remembered the day I accepted Jesus as my savior. That was the one day, I felt safe and secure. Now, I get to read about being secure in God versus being secure in my self and this is helping me. I never thought I was significant and with the Total Disability, I still have problems with this one - most people would say I am not significant because of my illness. But even with my problems, I am able to produce Godly fruit despite my problems. In fact, without having the problems, I would never have the oportunity to reach people who have some of my problems but don't have God to help them through them. So I see my significance through the scriptures. I always wanted to write. It was the one goal of my life since age 9, but the publishing part scared me so bad that I couldn't write anything. Since reading about Goals versus Desires, I am able to write. In fact, this one chapter was worth the price of the book. My church councelor recently gave me the homework assignment of writing down everyone who had hurt me, let me down, made me angry, etc. I plan to use the steps for forgiveness in the book for getting rid of this trash. I plan to give this book for Christmas to those that are struggling. I think that they too are looking for help.
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