...Trust me, my jaw has not dropped in a long time (and that's not a VP-style double entendre), but nearly EVERY scene was jaw-droppingly, eye-poppingly, mind-bogglingly terrible.
You know what you're in for when the main titles consist of Steve Guttenberg roller-skating through Manhattan, obstensibly "listening" and skate-dancing to the song played over the titles--however, Guttenberg instead seems to be dancing to the voices in his own head, so out of sync is he with the music.
Things get even loonier when we're asked to believe that buxom Valerie Perrine was "the face of the 70's," as in that decade's top fashion model. For WHOM? Frederick's of Hollywood? Lauren Hutton she ain't. Throw in Bruce Jenner (!!!) as the--ahem--straight man, camp icons Tammy Grimes and June Havoc, Marilyn Sokol as the very poor man's Eve Arden, and the Village People passing as hetero, and you've got one seriously twisted movie.
Let's just rundown the highlights:
1) Bruce Jenner (PLAYING A STRAIGHT MAN, I must reiterate), running around New York City in Daisy Dukes and a bare midriff, shrunken tee shirt.
2) A group of little boys in full VP drag, including the Leatherman's get-up. (It's for a milk commercial. Don't ask.)
3) David Hodo's (the Construction Worker) big solo number, "I Love You to Death," which, to be fair, seems to have been conceived as an intentionally comic parody. (However, the same could be said of the entire film.) At any rate, David can't sing, but he's really hot jumping around in his skintight jeans, while being clawed at by overly-made-up mannequins in Halston knock-offs.
4) The "YMCA" production number, which is a hysterically inept homage to "Million Dollar Mermaid" and "Gentlemen Prefer Blondes"--but you do get to see a lot of bare, buffed skin.
5) The finale ultimo, with the VP is sequined versions of their uniform drag--prior to going onstage, they're visited by "special guest star Leigh Taylor-Young."
Needless to say, one must proceed with caution when deciding to buy/watch this trash masterpiece. But for those hardy souls, there is NO other film in my recent memory on which SO much money was spent, with NO redeeming results whatsoever. Every scene is awful. All of the lead "actors" are rotten--Perrine and Guttenberg must have been sniffing coke between takes, because each one performs at a disturbingly manic pace.
So why the four star review? Because it's irresistible in its own weird way--like a car crash, only vastly more entertaining. It's also a priceless time capsule of an era that was only 20-odd years ago, but seems like a lifetime away. Also, the DVD transfer is gorgeous--they must be BIG fans of this movie at the remastering studio.
