Waiting for My Cats to Die: A Memoir [Paperback]

Stacy Horn (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 17, 2002

When Stacy Horn--single, deeply addicted to television, and hopelessly attached to two diabetic cats--turned forty, she free-falled into a mid-life crisis. Waiting for My Cats to Die is a passionately and profoundly honest look at what happens the moment you realize--beyond a shadow of a doubt--that some day the credits will roll on your life. There are all those things you haven't done yet. There are all those things you have and wish you hadn't. In the battle against time, a frontal attack is the best strategy. Horn explores abandoned cemeteries and descends into crypts. She researches long-lost relatives, interviews the elderly, and learns all she can about the ghost haunting her apartment. No sign indicating the downward pull of things goes unnoticed. And yet life, with so much to celebrate, is irresistible. Here is a wonderful, quirky, refreshing memoir of hilarity and heartache: life at the mid-point of life.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

She'd cringe at the comparison, but Stacy Horn is a real-life Bridget Jones. Except, of course, that Stacy's situation is worse: she's fortysomething, not thirtysomething, and already lives with two cats. What's even worse is that her cats--who aren't related, by the way--are both diabetic. She's having a midlife crisis, watches too much TV ("Look, I'm not saying it's ideal, but I would call watching TV a life"), and is obsessed with death:

I keep coming back to death the same way I can't stop touching a sore tooth with my tongue to see if it still hurts. Death. Still terrifying? Yes. How about now? Yes. And now? Yes.

She spends her days drumming with a samba group, pulling weeds in graveyards, praying to dead relatives, caring for her diabetic cats, crafting detailed fantasies, and running EchoNYC, the online community that she created. Why on earth would anyone want to read about that?

Because it's funny; sometimes, even laugh-out-loud-then-feel-sheepish-because-you're-on-the-bus funny. Stacy's shocked realization that she is in the unconscious habit of shouting out her cats' nicknames while she walks down the street ("Munches!" "Boo!" "Belly!") is worth the price of the book alone:

So it hit me: I am one of those crazy people who talks to herself on the street, one of the ones who makes you wonder where she came from and how she got to this sorry state. Great. How did I get to this sorry state, yelling to cats who are not there?

Waiting for My Cats to Die also can be heartbreaking, however, as in some of the brief interviews that she conducts with elderly people, or when she reveals her fears that she'll spend the rest of her life alone, or when one of her cats does indeed die. In the end, however, Stacy is hopeful, past her midlife crisis, and resolved that, in the absence of "one true love," she will "fall in love with everyone and everything a little." Tama Janowitz describes reading the book as being "like getting to hang out with a wonderful friend." We should all be so lucky to have friends as genuine, and funny, as Stacy Horn. --Sunny Delaney --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

Horn, a cyber-pioneer who launched Echo, a successful Gotham-based online community in the early '90s (and documented it in 1997's Cyberville), assembles haphazard thoughts on her samba drumming career, her diabetic cats, death and the single life, in this morbid but engagingly quirky memoir. Although she has no reason to believe that her own mortality is imminent (she's in her early 40s), Horn dives into the subject with all the zeal of a Baptist preacher. She discusses it online with peers and on the phone with elderly people, analyzes her cats' reactions to aging, and even explores the mystery of a ghost who supposedly haunts her apartment. That zeal is what holds this otherwise confused approach to understanding midlife together. In some chapters, Horn discusses particular aspects of her life and their deeper meaning, from what she presents as her hopelessly pudgy stomach to the fate of her business. In other sections--the book's tightest--she interviews senior citizens in an attempt to prove that wisdom comes with old age. However, what she finds through many of her conversations is that those who've lived a great deal of life often have no special secrets or knowledge to impart. The polls she conducts among Net-savvy New Yorkers on Echo add to her research and demonstrate that she's not alone in wistfully envying a 24-year-old's body. Although this work lacks focus and a clear thesis, it's a remarkably candid account of one woman's acceptance of aging, piqued with heartening moments of exhilaration.

Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 320 pages
• Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin (January 17, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0312287445
• ISBN-13: 978-0312287443
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.5 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (42 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #271,711 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I'm currently working on a book about singing for Algonquin Books. "I believe in singing. I believe in singing together." - Brian Eno. My book is about the history and science of singing together, and about about the world of choral singing.

My most recent book is about the former Duke Parapsychology Laboratory and it's called Unbelievable. Scientists have always disdained parapsychology, but there was a time, from the 30s to the 60s, when the scientific community thought, well, okay, ectoplasm, seances and table rappings aside, maybe there is something going on. Duke opened a lab to study the various phenomena, and for a few decades, a group of serious scientists and graduate students tried to find if there was anything there. My book is about the result of their experiments and investigations.

I grew up on Long Island, got a B.F.A. from Tufts University and the School of the Museum of Fine Arts, and a graduate degree from the Interactive Telecommunications Program at NYU.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

18 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Same Boat, Waiting To Sink, September 5, 2006

By 

HotRodJunkie "HotRodJunkie" (Columbus Ohio) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Waiting for My Cats to Die: A Memoir (Paperback)

Almost 40 here, 2 old fart felines- Chelsea (16) is diabetic with a number of itchy ailments, Shakespeare (17) has used the litter box about 3 times during his life- I've been cursed with the chore of rotating hand towels for his toilet leisure. And for the past 5 yrs or so, Chelsea has played kitty see - kitty do. Saves me a lot on the cost of litter, but I well make up for it with air deodorants and plug-ins as kitty urine smells 10x worse on a towel hung to dry while I wait for a full load to wash every 4-5 days.

A friend asked me if I'd heard about Stacy's book, I had not but quickly picked up a copy and waited a while to read it, dreading the ending chapter of course. Since I am home all the time, very emotionally in tune and attached to these two cats- having spent more time in their presence than with any other living creature during my life, when I did read the book, it was like reading my own story mixed with a close friend's story. This in 2002, at a point when my cats were rotating sick days, and I figured it wouldn't be long. Well we don't always rotate sick days now, being a diabetic now myself- sometimes we are all having a sick day on the same day, but we pull each other through.

If you are a cat lover, or ever taken care of a sick loved one, or in general a person with any kind of kindness and love in your heart, you will giggle, roll your eyes, tear up and break down- all within a few pages of each other even! Its a wonderful and touching book.

I'm a guy that 17 years ago never thought I'd be in such a boat with these two old friends. As I STILL wait to start a new life once these guys are gone, we snuggle up to bed and I never regret a second of it, no matter what or how much I had to clean up today, or how bad one of them is smelling at the moment! :) Friends that tell me its time to put them down, don't see how as sick as one is one day, they bounce back the next day and play like the mighty hunters they once were. It is going to be a little longer, at least.

Thank you Stacy!

2008 Update: My long-time buddies have been gone for almost a year now. I still miss them every single day, and treasure when they occasionally visit me in my dreams where they are healthy and vibrant again. I thank them for so many years of companionship and comfort, and I know one day I will be reunited with them somehow.

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Chapter Surfing, June 27, 2004

By 

LissaCat "lissacat" - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Waiting for My Cats to Die: A Memoir (Paperback)

A word about the organization of the book. Most books have chapter titles or chapter numbers. Not "Waiting for My Cats to Die." Stacy Horn is a channel surfer who has a specific set of programming she adores (Buffy being one). Her book is organized much like this. She changes topics like channels--cats, death, fantasy, romance, polls, work--and occasionally introduces special programming--interviews. It was an interesting structure, and it fit the work.

I'm a thirty-something with a thirteen year old diabetic cat (thank goodness he doesn't have to compete for the title of 'best subcutaneous drip taking cat'). I stumbled across "Waiting for My Cats to Die" while looking for books about feline diabetes. I'm glad I did, despite mourning a cat I've never met.

I thought her tone was very engaging, and it was an excellent read. I loved how she taught herself to play drums in an area where she wouldn't bother anyone, and her descriptions of the little glories that life has to offer.

Buy it. Check it out of your library. Read the book, you'll be glad you did (but after you hit the middle, get a box of tissues at the ready).

13 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Life at it's Darkest, Strangest, and Most Alive., March 29, 2001

By 

Pamela R. Benton - See all my reviews

This review is from: Waiting for My Cats to Die: A Morbid Memoir (Hardcover)

"Waiting for my Cats to Die" Is a book you must read. It's about Stacy Horn. It's about Pamela Benton. It's about your friends. It's about you. It's about the human condition in the new century. It's about time you read it. "Waiting for my Cats to Die" is that book that only comes along every once in awhile, out of the blue, by an unknown author, and takes the world by surprize with it's charm, wit, intellegence, heartbreak and laughter. On the exterior, you see a excerpt from a middle-aged woman's life, dealing with her mid-life crisis. However, once you delve deeper into it's pages you see it's not just for aging women. The issues it deals with pertain to us all. Mortality. Living single. Losing loved ones. Fear. Friends. Wading through the shallow end of the dating pool. Career. Money. Love. Redemption. LIFE. "Waiting for my Cats to Die" will most certainly touch you, stir your soul, and make you examine your own life. It will make you feel better, live happier, and just maybe.. smile. It will probably change you, most certainly entertain you, and maybe make it all a litlle easier for awhile. You don't have to care about Stacy's life... although you will. You just need to read her book, and understand yourself a little more. No, it's not just a mid-life crisis book. It's not an avid reader's self-help book. It's just one great little piece of literature that's really effected me deeply. I'm not a book person, and I don't need to feel young again. I'm just a 24 year old whom ran across this page on Amazon and decided to take a chance. And you know what? I'm glad.