The Water Giver: The Story of a Mother, a Son, and Their Second Chance [Hardcover]

Joan Ryan (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 8, 2009

Joan Ryan tells the powerful story of how her son’s near-fatal accident, and his struggle to become whole again, gave her a second chance to become the mother she had always wished she could be.

• Acclaimed journalist and author: Joan Ryan’s sports columns earned her thirteen Associated Press Sports editors Awards, the National Headliner Award, and the Women’s Sports Foundation’s Journalism Award, among other honors. Her first book, Little Girls in Pretty Boxes: The Making and Breaking of Elite Gymnasts and Figure Skaters was named one of the Top 100 Sports Books of all Time by Sports Illustrated.

• Medical drama: When Ryan’s sixteen-year-old son fell off of a skateboard, it wasn’t obvious at first how serious his injuries were. With a journalist’s eye for the telling detail and the rhythms of a natural storyteller, she captures his medical ordeal as he lurches from crisis to crisis—and with harrowing honesty and astonishing insight, relates her own journey through unknown emotional terrain.

• A mother’s story: Ryan’s son was diagnosed with Sensory Integration Dysfunction as a toddler; by the time he reached school age, it was clear that he suffered from ADHD and other learning disabilities. Though she loved him fiercely, she never stopped trying to fix him. When he is restored to her after his accident, she realizes she has the opportunity to be his mother all over again—only this time she lets go of the illusion of control. Now she not only accepts, but also embraces her son for who he really is.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

How does one raise children to be the best they can be, instead of the best of who you want them to be? Former San Francisco Chronicle sports columnist Ryan (Little Girls in Pretty Boxes) wrestled with this question for most of her adopted son Ryan's life, never quite feeling as if her mothering instincts fit the boy she loved. His early childhood diagnosis with sensory integration dysfunction gave her analytical side a roadmap of therapies and teaching tools, but the heartbreak of watching him struggle endlessly in school and at home left her emotionally exhausted and unsure of herself. Then their lives changed: after falling from his skateboard just blocks from their home at age TK, her son suffered a traumatic brain injury that left him unable to walk or talk, requiring multiple complex surgeries and months of rehabilitation. Her story of supporting him through this experience, with expert medical teams and tremendous aid from family and friends, is a testament both to her stamina and to his strength. Given the perspective that sometimes only a crisis can bring, Ryan learns to forgive herself for the smaller struggles of her son's earlier years, to take each day's challenges as they come and to trust herself to be the only mother that he needs. (Sept.)
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Review

"We have to admire Ryan for tackling these topics. It is one thing to

live through the experiences as they occur; it is quite another to

re-create them honestly and effectively. And though the story Ryan

tells is unique...the themes of love, grace and redemption that run

through her discussion are ideas with which we can all relate."

--Christina Eng, The San Francisco Chronicle

 

"Given the perspective that sometimes only a crisis can bring, Ryan learns to forgive herself for the smaller struggles of her son's earlier years, to take each day's challenges as they come and to trust herself to be the only mother that he needs."

--Publishers Weekly

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 272 pages
• Publisher: Simon & Schuster; First Simon and Schuster Hardcover edition (September 8, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1416576525
• ISBN-13: 978-1416576525
• Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.1 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #931,204 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

JOAN RYAN is an award-winning journalist and author. She was a pioneer in sports journalism, becoming one of the first female sports columnists in the country. Her first book, Little Girls in Pretty Boxes: The Making and Breaking of Elite Gymnasts and Figure Skaters was named one of the Top 100 Sports Books of All Time by Sports Illustrated. She is a media consultant for the San Francisco Giants. Joan lives in Marin County, north of San Francisco, with her husband, Fox sportscaster Barry Tompkins, their 19-year-old son, Ryan, and their dog, Bill.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Great book for all parents, September 17, 2009

By 

Jeannine Yeomans "U.C. Berkeley '67" (San Francisco) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Water Giver: The Story of a Mother, a Son, and Their Second Chance (Hardcover)

As a parent who lost a child when he was 14, and now with my two daughters grown up and healthy, I highly recommend The Water Giver to any parent who needs reassurance that we may not all have been perfect, but we did the best we can. Joan Ryan shares how she felt like her son's "manager" (I was guilty of that with all my kids too)and how her son taught her to just be his mother. The book choked me up at times but also inspired me and made me laugh. I loved it and have bought seven copies for friends.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Any mother can relate., October 9, 2009

By 

L. Lee (Berkeley, CA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Water Giver: The Story of a Mother, a Son, and Their Second Chance (Hardcover)

Through her son's near death accident and the journey her family takes towards recovery, Joan Ryan takes the reader through a roller coaster of emotions. You might think you would be crying from cover to cover, but that's not the case. There are humorous and wonderful moments that will have you laughing out loud. There are also frightening moments that will keep you turning page after page. And, yes, there are moments you might shed some tears. But throughout it all, every moment is REAL. Ms. Ryan's courage to share her experiences so honestly is what makes you root for this family and is why you should read this book.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars more than a second chance, September 18, 2009

By 

JBarr - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Water Giver: The Story of a Mother, a Son, and Their Second Chance (Hardcover)

The Water Giver is beautifully written and interesting, beginning to end. The horrible accident and medical journey are balanced with tales of family and friends, work and delightful anecdotes. One can laugh, cry, feel empathy, and relate. As soon as I finished, I wanted to read it again.