Customer Reviews

The Wedding Guide for the Grownup Bride: Getting Married When You're Old Enough to Know What You're Doing

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

This book is a treasure in the midst of the piles of repetitive ... about getting married. If you don't fit into the average profile of Girl Getting Married, this book will have something for you. I think the way they're marketing this book is a bit off -- it's not only age that makes you different. I'm getting married for the first time now at 33, and I found SO much to identify with in this book. Besides, it's hilarious, and was such fun to read in between issues of Martha Stewart. I'm recommending it to all my friends.

I'm getting married for the first time at age 43, I've got a three-foot shelf filled with wedding planners and guides euphoric friends and family members have purchased for me, and I'm starting to hate looking at all that bridal stuff. What's wrong with this picture?

Now that I've read Shelley Christiansen's book, I know for sure: Nothing. I'm just typical a midlife bride, marrying a man who has been on his own for twenty years. We're not focusing on what we look like walking down the aisle. We're dreaming about family life and growing old together.

This is the book I needed to read. This is the book that's made me happy and excited and a good deal more relaxed about "The Big Event." The first part, "Forget the Wedding, Prepare for Marriage," covers all the major issues that adults who are used to being sole decision-makers have to learn to collaborate on and get clear about--like finances and how much space one's belongings take up and whether to eat out or in. The author offers living proof that husbands and wives can make these adjustments with humor and grace.

The second part of the book covers the wedding from start to finish, emphasizing above all else how it's not about image or etiquette so much as it is about making choices--generally, with your future husband at your side--that reflect who you are as individuals and where you are in your lives. This may or may not correspond to a certain color of table linen or type of centerpiece. One great bit of advice Christiansen has is to focus on perfecting one or two aspects of the ceremony and reception that are close to your heart--for some couples, it's music, for others, flowers or photos. (No matter how busy you are, doesn't that sound like fun?)

The third section of the book covers life after the wedding, and it's a little sketchy and lacking in authority compared to the first two parts--perhaps because the author is still a newlywed. I only wish the Christiansens were planning to become parents. I'm sure the sequel to "Grownup Bride" would be great.

As the prospective husband-to-be, it is wonderful to hear excerpts that my intended reads to me when she comes across something that really hits home (which happens constantly). We fit the profile presented in the book to a tee and I find myself identifying closely with many, many things in the book. Preperations for Long Island style wedding celebrations can be lenghtly and exhausting, and the day can wind up being quite expensive. They are generally geared to those that we have amost 20 years on, and some of the pagentry borders on the uncomfortable. Instead, the book is written from the perspective of us "40-somethings". I have actually had the feeling of relief descend upon me after hearing the common sense ideas and flexible approach that is typical of the book. So, I say "Way to Go" Shelly Christiansen, and "Thank you" too !

Thank you, Shelley Christiansen, for writing a realistic, practical and very funny book about getting married in real life when you have real commitments. I felt like I was talking to myself or a trusted girlfriend about this THING that has become my engagement and impending wedding. Shelley talks to the reader realistically and with a sense of humor about what to consider and about what you WANT to have, not what you SHOULD have, at your wedding. I'm 36 and getting married for the first time. This book is the first one I've read that offers a balance of making your wedding special, along with keeping the event in perspective - plus a healthy dose of humor. It's full of common sense. It was a relief to read it and know that I'm not alone in not buying into the whole wedding industry machine. She is an excellent writer! I read the whole book in one day and refer to it often.

As a first time mid-life bride marrying a man who's been there, done that, 3 times prior in fact, I've met with my share of shock, disbelief and advice. None of it worthwhile until a close friend, herself a mid-life first time wife, recommended this jewel of a book. Shelley Christainsen tells it like it is, as opposed to the typical starry eyed bride guides who tell it like Cinderella imagined it to be. This book is a must read for every mid-life bride (and wanna be) and will be the first gift I give newly engaged friends from now on.

Ms. Christiansen's book has proven to be a godsend. She has my sincerest thanks for writing such a timely book--and just when I need it! It's the only one I could find (and I'm a librarian) that addresses mid-life marriage. I've been widowed for 15 years, am now 49, and wasn't expecting this turn of events at all. Her advice, couched in her own experiences, reminds me that we can do this in a simple, elegant way and still have a wonderful time! Highly recommended.

This is an amazing book for any one who is not a young bride. She has done an excellent job explaining wedding requirements, others expectations and all with a great deal of humor. The author provides great ideas for the "mid-life" bride and also permission to do the wedding your way. I have never enjoyed a book more...forget Martha and the bridal magazines if you are over 35 you need this book.

Shortly after we set the date, I bought one of those very detailed wedding planning books, and immediately demanded that we elope. Fortunately, my fiance talked me out of it. Then I found this book, and felt better about the whole planning process. It's funny, informative, and readable. The advice given is useful, even if the author is a tad opinionated in places.

I also like the way it covers life after the wedding, which take up almost half of the book.

I'm over 40, never been married. Most of the publications out there are for the young blushing brides. For those of us who are further along in life, there are different things to ponder. I really appreciate the insight that the author shares of her own wedding in her forties, as well as that of her aunt -- who married for the first time in her seventies!!

The advice is practical, not saccharine. Best part is that some of my opinions / attitudes about being a bride at this age were "validated" -- kind of a "whew", I'm on the right track.

Must read for anyone that isn't going to have a "princess wedding", but still wants a special day.

I am going to be a first-time bride at 45 (second for my future hubby, who is 46). I never wanted all the frills....I wanted to elope! It was my FH's suggestion to have an intimate wedding as my 76 and 73 year old parents would be hurt if they couldn't share our day.
I immediately felt the stress of how to plan OUR day OUR way...and that is when I found Shelley Christiansen's book. As I read it I found myself relaxing....yes! She got it...and let me know I wasn't alone in what I was experiencing. I didn't want yet another 'planner' or 'instruction manual'. I needed to know that getting married in midlife gives you the right to throw away conventional rules and celebrate your choice to spend your life with someone you love. We have indeed planned for our life together after marriage...and don't feel so stressed now about planning for this one special day in what will be many more to come. Thanks so much Shelley!