38 of 42 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
This book is better than The Circle, April 12, 2006
This review is from: Welcome to Your Crisis: How to Use the Power of Crisis to Create the Life You Want (Hardcover)
If you have read Laura Day's The Circle ... the section on creating space hints at why a crisis is also an opportunity. President Kennedy once said that the Chinese characters for Crisis was the same as opportunity and this book delves deeper into the nature of that phenomenon. Laura Day has experienced these events herself and is speaking from experience. Often in a crisis the natural inclination is to focus on our emotional responses. When these reactions are negative it often triggers unhealed wounds that cause us to re-traumatize ourselves. Herein lies either the blessing or the curse ... and the remedy is in our choices to heal the original wound once and for all, and often with the help of those trained to do so. If we choose the emotionally healthy and healing response we are well on our way. If not, we risk staying in the quagmire of the trauma. Most people need guidance coming out alive, this is called resilience, and welcoming your crisis is the first step in ultimately...climbing out of the pit.
That said, it is OK to find constructive safe releases for justified anger, such as kick boxing, running, a therapy group, putting up boundaries, saying what you need to say to those involved in a situation, and legal vindication when required. Just as long as you discharge the emotions from your emotional body and seek legal, ethical, and moral conclusions as fast as possible so you are free by feeling justice. Then you are ready for phase 2 of a crisis response: processing what happened, learning the lessons, and being in a state of forgiveness so it doesn't happen again. Forgiveness is when you let go fully and honestly of the attachment to the idea that the past be any differently than it was. And forgiving before it is emotionally safe and healthy for you only hurts you more with the poison of denial. THIS IS TOUGH AND IT HAPPENS GRADUALLY. BUT YOU MUST DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO TO BOUNCE BACK STRONGER AND BETTER. Remember ... go with the energy properly and with the intent that the best revenge is a well-lived life in integrity. Remember too that two wrongs don't make a right, being hurt gives you NO permission to perpetrate another. It's more like the man whose wife runs off on him with another man, in the most vindictive fashion, and once the divorce is finalized becomes a mult-millionnaire and she can't touch his fortune. More just desserts then bitter pill.
One of my newest favorite films displays this principle in action. In the 2005 movie "Just Friends", the overweight Chris is madly in love with his best friend Jamie. When he confesses his feelings for her on graduation night, he is spurned and publicly humiliated. In shock, Chris jumps on his bike (it's a teenage love crisis) and screams with FULL INTENTION "I'll show you"! "I'll show you all"! Then rides away. Ten years later he is a hot, successful music executive in LA who dates supermodels, plays semi-pro hockey, and is a major handsome buffed catch. His teenage hurt and rejection propelled him to become larger than life. It's a classic re-telling of a myth of the ugly duckling. Laura Day helps guide readers to re-creating their personal myth in the same way. Laura Day explains further how intention in the midst of a crisis can really move things forward.
Towards the end of the book Laura Day talks about the many gifts that resulted in her life in response to losing her mother and her marital breakup. She talks about no longer missing her mother becasue of this. This is what the gift of a crisis means.
A crisis generates a lot of energy so it is a chance to harness this life force and invest it in manifesting what you truly want. Day's book explores this path and can jumpstart some ideas if you are truly in the tornado of a crisis so you can go from turbulence to flow. Take the energy (like horsepower) and ride FORWARD to your dreams. Laura Day describes different ways to do this in the book if you have no clue where to start. Transform your energy and your life will look different. Change your choices from unhealthy to healthy and that will only accelerate things. Without a dream people perish ... put your attention to making your vision for yourself manifest ... and the roadmap out of a crisis become clear. Day stated in her earlier book "The Circle" that sometimes we unconsciosly create a crisis in our lives because we do need a major wake up call. This is very true.
I've met Laura Day and did a private circle masters weekend with her and a small group in May 2002 when I lived in Toronto, Canada. The timing was excellent because the elements of the circle threw my life as I had known it into a "crisis". My wish was to change careers and be more creative on my own ... within 18 months my professional life was in upheaval, new friendships came and existing ones transformed radically, I was compelled to change my diet, exercise, and it became paramount to practice Buddhist meditation for my sense of well-being. I was also pushed my these events to handle my sense of responsibility, review my reaction to things, and face where I wasn't the best friend to people. Needless to say it was emotional and confronting. But like Day said, the crisis forced me to create what I truly wanted. How? By handling my emotions I was propelled to do journaling to manage the limiting thoughts I needed to let go of. In that journaling, my intuition lead me to creative groups in the city and beyond. By late 2004, new structures of a creative life were in place as a foundation and outlet for my voice. Whereas I created drama in my personal life, the crisis guided and redirected me to keep the drama as fiction on the pages of a narrative. It did wonders for my emotions!
Another more recent experience I had was having to leave a comfortable job because of corporate restructuring, wage freezing, and political changes in organizational governance. This was a place that offered a transition out of my previous career path. Within a week of accepting a package I also went through a break-up. The job was one thing but the relationship quite another. It seemed to be going well but truly could go no further. This opening in space and time allowed me to take advantage of an offer to do The Hoffman Process to address my internal limitations I imposed on myself. During the Hoffman Process it became clear that I needed to use my career crisis to make a full blown change. Thanks to another Laura (Berman Fortgang) I made a switch leveraging on my transferable skills within 90 days. Good-bye public relations - hello conference development. Then, about 2 weeks into a new career, a chance phone call lead to someone new who was (A) a much better match; (B) very loving and loveable; and (C) was there all along but I couldn't see until a crisis helped clear the way for it. Even though we only had a summer to get to know one another before I left for California ...I can genuinely say that I wanted to thank the last guy for leaving and creating a space for a new person to show up. And believe me, I was quite mad at the last guy for a pretty petty reason, but wish him well now.
For those looking to seriously get intensive support during a crisis... check out The Hoffman Process, Option Institute, or Kripalu Center where you can let out in a safe and healing environment, your emotions.
Another reader mentioned that one need not be in a crisis to benefit from this book. Rather, this can be used as a preventative thing too. I totally agree. This is one book that everyone can read whether you are into woo-woo or a hard nosed realist. This is NOT New Age but a self-guidance program from Day's own experience. One thing I noticed about Welcome to Your Crisis is that the excercises seem to work well if a person is doing The Circle. The techniques accelerate the creation of a new reality from an old one quite well. If you can try to pick up both books together.
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19 of 19 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
I want to buy this book for nearly everyone I know!, April 23, 2006
This review is from: Welcome to Your Crisis: How to Use the Power of Crisis to Create the Life You Want (Hardcover)
Laura Day manages to turn the idea of "crisis" inside-out. She explains that crises "revolutionize" us; they wake us up and invite us to make decisions about our lives. In fact, as she says, the word "crisis" and "decision" actually come from the same Greek root.
I loved the helpful exercises. Unlike the other reviewer, I did not read the book in two days (although it's an easy read and I could have). Instead, I poured myself into the exercises, answering her questions in a journal. Laura is the goddess of simplicity and practicality, yet, at the same time, her work has tremendous depth. For instance, check out her discussion of the relationship between the four response types: anger, anxiety, denial, and depression -- it's clear, deep, real, and very useful.
Many people live in crisis without realizing it, and this is part of what makes *Welcome to Your Crisis* such an amazing book. I want to give a copy to at least 10 people I know right now who would benefit from the affirmative, wise, and wonderful advice in this book.
[...]and the rest of the world, start a revolution; read this book!
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25 of 27 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
An extraordinary new paradigm for crisis management., April 26, 2006
This review is from: Welcome to Your Crisis: How to Use the Power of Crisis to Create the Life You Want (Hardcover)
The stress of crisis can provoke unhealthy behavior in otherwise healthy adults. Bestselling author Laura Day takes a fresh look at various coping styles, and helps readers understand the four basic styles she's identified: depression, anxiety, rage and denial.
Understanding our own knee-jerk reaction to major crises in our lives is our first step toward gaining control. Reading the rest of this book is the next step toward developing a new, conscious style of coping that builds on the strengths of our natural tendencies while transcending their simultaneous weaknesses.
In addition to self-knowledge, this book imparts insights into others and how their own reactions to crisis, and approaches to problem-solving, can vary dramatically. I envision this book being of particular value to anyone who manages others (e.g. executives and entrepreneurs) as a way of gaining insight into others' coping mechanisms and learning how they might best be assisted.
Laura Day is a gifted, insightful writer whose compassion and wisdom shine through on every page of this extraordinary book.
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