Customer Reviews

What Babies Say Before They Can Talk : The Nine Signals Infants Use to Express Their Feelings

5 star:		(17)
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3 star:		(2)
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On the last day of my developmental psychology class, just before I completed my degree, my professor ended the class with one sentence: "I know all of you have wondered at some point during the semester what you will some day do as parents. My advice is simple. Read What Babies Say Before They Can Talk." I frantically jotted this down in my planner and went on with life. A while later when we were expecting our son, I gladly ordered this book and was blown away at how far above and beyond it exceeded my expectations.

I must admit after completing the book I am very jealous. I worked extremely hard on my school's pre-medical psychology degree track to obtain pieces of the knowledge presented in this book. While I had to also learn names, theory and cite endless laboratory proof just to come away with the "good stuff", like how to be a thoughtful and effective parent, it seems a teensy bit unfair that this one small book could give parents the same arsenal of knowledge I am coming into parenthood with after years of extensive study. Nevertheless, I whole-heartedly recommend it to anyone who is wanting to break the bonds of over-protective, bossy, traditional parenthood roles and allow their children to truly grow with wise and empowering guidance. If I had to pick only one parenting book to read, this would be it. I think you'll find your fears of turining into your parents (or having out-of-control toddlers) melt away with each page that you turn.

(For anyone, psychology-degreed or not, who is interested in reading further on the subject of non-judgemental parenting, may I also recommend "Redirecting Children's Behavior" by Kathryn J. Kvols. This gives you the skills to parent beyond the baby years into the toddler and teenage years with wisdom that could not be learned by yourself in a thousand lifetimes of raising children.)

The saying "a picture is worth a thousand words," is very true...especially when it comes to facial expressions. How many times have you looked at a baby's face and wondered what they were thinking? How frustrating it must be for them to want to verbally communicate with others, but being too young to know how. What if you could "read" a baby's cues, and know exactly what they were feeling?

In the book, "What Babies Say Before They Can Talk: The Nine Signals Infants Use to Express Their Feelings," Paul C. Holinger, M.D., M.P.H., discusses nine simple "signals" that babies use to express their feelings: These signals are: interest, enjoyment, surprise, distress, anger, fear, shame, disgust, and dissmell. The author explains how children are born knowing how to communicate their feelings with these symbols, and that adults need to take the time to understand and learn how their child communicates using these symbols.

This book also includes much information about parenting, helping your children develop high self-esteem, and explains the nine signals in detail.

MyParenTime.com highly recommends this book -- learning how a baby communicates creates better understanding, better interaction, and a better relationship between parent and child. In addition, responding to a child's needs early on, makes happier and healthier parents and children.

One of the best baby books out there from a psychological perspective. If I could only buy one baby book, this book would be it! Dr. Holinger is a psychoanalyst and he applies theory in a way that is very accessible. As a therapist I am surprised to see how few baby books are written by psychologists and psychoanalysts. I was happy to find this book and recommend it highly. It helps parents understand what being attuned truly means and it makes parenting more enjoyable. The first two years are so important and this book helps make them easier. It can also be applied to parenting in general because it promotes being responsive, empathic, and validating.

The title of this book is rather misleading. It is not just about nonverbal communication, but rather an extremely insightful guide to forming strong relationships with your children. It is also a way to articulate the ways in which our own baggage as parents impact those relationships. I found the straightforward and intelligent presentation of the information refreshing after looking through so many "Babies for Dummies"-type books that merely scratch the surface. Highly recommended!

This is a wonderful resource. My oldest son, Max, is nearly three, and I wish I'd read this book earlier!

I have been at wit's end lately with Max, and frustrated to the point where I've lost all my confidence as a parent. I felt like I spent all day saying "no", or crushing his spirit by yelling. There were more bad days than good days.

As I began reading Dr. Holinger's book, I was immediately able to start substituting better solutions for us. The problem is usually not with Max, it was with my reactions to Max's behavior. Every day is better when it ends with less yelling.
Thank you Dr. Holinger!

I agree with the another reviewer that the title is misleading. This book is quite profound and immediately impacted how I viewed my children's behavior. I started reading it when my daughter was a newborn and wished I had it earlier.

My only complaint, and I am having a hard time wording this...its a little...guilt inducing? It raises the bar of your parenting, and my reaction was to feel like I won't be able to measure up. Stories of insensative parenting weren't treated with a light touch or sense of 'we've all been there.' My parenting skills are a work in progress and my belief is that it will probably be a LIFE LONG process. But I've always gotten that sense from therapists. They talk about other people's faults and stories, not their own.

But that doesn't affect my rating, the book is really excellent.

I am not the most perceptive person when it comes to understanding my baby's emotions, so this book was very helpful to me. I often mistook fear for surprise, or didn't always notice disgust or shame, etc. This book describes the actual physical facial characteristics so that I can easily understand which emotion he is displaying. It also has great information on relating to your baby in general.

By the way, not only is this book highly esteemed by professionals in the field and backed by the latest research, but it was a great early childhood education in a quick and easy-to-read format. I would recommend this book to every parent.

I accidentally stumbled upon this book on Amazon and thought I would check it out. It was so much more than the title. It was much more involved into child/parent behavior and psychology and how to basically not screw up your child. As a first time Mom I will keep it and use it as a reference guide for the first 5+ years! I found it that amazing! I believe it's on a higher level than most of these over-simplified parenting books that are filled with the obvious. It's for the brighter reader, therefore far more interesting. The book is also based on actual scientific research, unlike some of the parenting books I have read by self-proclaimed experts which include some questionable advice. I am recommending it to all my friends who are parents, but they can't have MY copy!

Dr. Holinger has written a book that gives me a new way to view my child's actions. He gives me the ability to understand and react to my son in ways that keep him safe but allow him to explore this wonderful world he has entered into. The book is fun and interesting to read (even with all my highlighting!) and the vignettes make his points even easier to understand. This is a must have book.

This is a good book for all new parents. I think it lays a great foundation for handling your children. It also helps you recognize how your infant communicates. I was just a little disapointed because I was expecting a little more. I felt the emotions could have been explained more and that too much time was spent on other topics which were not related to the title of the book. The book also focuses a bit too much on older children when you expect it to purely be about your newborn/infant. I am hoping to use it in the future as my child grows. Along with this book I would recommend "Einstein Never Used Flashcards"....this is a brilliant read!