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What Brothers Think, What Sistahs Know: The Real Deal on Love and Relationships Paperback – January 20, 1999


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 302 pages
  • Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks; 1st edition (January 20, 1999)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0688164986
  • ISBN-13: 978-0688164980
  • Product Dimensions: 5 x 0.8 x 7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,144,481 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Coauthored by the creator of The Sistah's Rules and her husband, a reporter, this volume offers a fresh, often funny perspective on African-American relationships. Millner and Chiles probe each other's views on dating, sex and marriage in a fast-paced, sassy dialogue that both pokes fun at and illuminates the differences between male and female perspectives on love. What's wrong with taking the "slow route to the sheets?" Millner demands. "Men," retorts Chiles, with a candor that is one of the book's hallmarks, will go "fast, slow, medium?whatever's necessary to get into the panties." Some chapters address specifically issues of African-American relationships. One deals with the appeal of white women to the black "brother," for example, while another ponders why so many black women seem angry to black men. Other chapters reprise the universal themes of every relationship guide since the beginning of time. Such material can seem so basic it's banal: Do we really need such a clued-in pair to tell us that the best way to be asked out on a second date is to be yourself? Still underneath the street smarts and the slang so hip some readers will need a glossary, Chiles and Millner are warm, straightforward, down-to-earth mentors. One of the book's great pleasures is the chance to eavesdrop on their blunt but affectionate banter, which models just the kind of male-female honesty extolled by experts of all colors.
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Booklist

Following on the heels of Denene Millner's successful book, The Sistahs' Rules (1997), this work written with her husband, Nick Chiles, is sure to be a best-seller given that the subject of male/female relationships is always a hot topic. Taking a page from John Gray's Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus (1992), the couple revamp his approach to relationships, tailoring their advice to African American couples. The book is divided into three sections--" The Meeting Stage," "Getting the Love You Need," and "Keeping It Alive" --each comprising about 10 chapters in which the couple attempt to understand each other's point of view by discussing obstacles that are unique to African American men and women. The authors tackle the subject with humor and raw honesty, offering an entertaining, informative, and provocative book. Sure to find a following. Lillian Lewis

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Customer Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on May 18, 1999
Format: Paperback
I GRABBED THIS BOOK FROM MY AFRICAN AMERICAN FRIEND, AS I WAS CURIOUS AND IT LOOKED FUN!! THIS BOOK IS HILARIOUSLY FUNNY AND CLEVER!! ANYONE CAN RELATE TO THE MALE/FEMALE RELATIONSHIP OBSTACLES IN THIS BOOK. ALSO, THE BOOK IS POLITICALLY CORRECT, CLEVER AND URBANE!! I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK TO ALL WOMEN/MEN STRUGGLING TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER!! 5 STARS!!!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By "queenr298" on June 28, 2001
Format: Paperback
I found this book to be very insightfull and true. I may have not agreed with all aspects of the book, but I respect it very much. Along with mind opening subjects and discussion, it was also savy, sassy, and downright funny. Any person, regardless of sex, nationality, race, or creed should pickup this book. It gives a pretty good look into the mind and soul of African-American Women, Men and our relationships. To all readers however, do not use this or any other like this to swear by. The writers are human just like you and me and do not represent all African-American's feelings to a T. Therefore, use your own judgement in making decisions of the heart.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on June 24, 1999
Format: Paperback
This book will have you wanting to give the authors high-fives, and saying "I can definately relate to that." Deneen and Nick certainly dated-no doubt about it. They bring you to the dating scene of the '90's woman and man. So down to earth and real, this book is one that brothas may think they might want to read, but from one sistah to another, I know you should.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Renay on April 7, 1999
Format: Paperback
This husband and wife team deals with a lot of issues that not only reflect the married life as a couple, however they also deal with a lot of issues that are simply just effecting the entire male and female relationship in our society. This book is full of humor and reality. A very calm relax read without the arguments and uproar.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By L. Tunstall Scott 4 on June 5, 2002
Format: Paperback
The boy was so funny and it kept it real .The boy was so true because man are just like she say . The book was just like the movie Two Can Play That Game just like the it kept it real .over all the book is funny and good.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful By ElizabethTunstall on April 5, 2002
Format: Paperback
I just want to thank the author of this book for making it. I love you guys. Ya'll done it again. I can really relate to this book in many ways. I'm just a teenager and I've been threw alot of this stuff. For all of the haters out there this book is very educational in the relationship world. Man I LAUGH,LAUGH,and LAUGH some more. I was mostly on the bus when I was reading it and I chuckled on the bus all the way to my destination. Everybody thought I was going CRAZY. The cousin Pookies and the uncle Ray-Ray part was so FUNNY. Everybody got one of them in there family.
To end my comments the most important part of this book is on page 166 and 167. Sex is all good and fun but but AIDS is'nt , it is good to know about safe sex.This is a good book and I will refer it to all of my friends A.S.A.P.
God Bless!
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Format: Paperback
there is a trajectory here, from first words to marriage, or if not marriage, some serious living together and how the bills get paid and how the housework is divided, fitting sex in, and remaining together for better or worse.

the authors are the first to say this isn't sociology or a counseling guide the two of them have written together, just a man and a woman, a married couple, who have gone through the steps of a dance that has no standard pattern, and, while still on the floor, took time to communicate about all that man/woman stuff that men don't understand about women and women don't understand about men, each in turn questioning and answering the best they know how all those issues, and as far as i can determine, they're all here, behind the questions: why you men act like that and why you women act like that?

emotional, funny, informative on how the rest of the gender might think about a particular issue letting one know one's not alone in believing something must be wrong with the opposite sex or oneself, not to say that either he or she is right or wrong but there should be room for communication, and nick chiles and denene millner help make it like that.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on February 2, 1999
Format: Paperback
This is not serious literature, just a laugh-out-loud funny book that is sure to entertain you. Millner and Chiles are witty, wise, and honest. I want more!
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