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Though it's often said that you don't just marry a person, you marry their family too, these complex relationships are often reduced to mother-in-law jokes and cruel stereotypes. Apter, a writer, psychologist and Cambridge University fellow, explores the mysteries and conflicts that come with the in-laws, including mother, father, sister and brother. Offering compelling insights into the power these relationships over a marriage, and the well being of both partners, Apter bases her report on interviews with 150 volunteers, in both the U.K. and the U.S. With professional grace, Apter exposes the emotional minefields that couples often navigate around in-laws, and the ease with which they become stuck in negative (and familiar) attitudes toward them. Apter moves beyond convenient labels, for example readdressing the idea of a mama's boy and what he can mean for a new wife, and convincingly demonstrating why women bear the brunt of the tension from both sides of the family. Self-help-standard questionnaires, exercises and coping methods-mostly practical-are also included in each chapter, giving readers knowledge and skills to relate more openly with the loved one's less-than-loveable family.
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Apter's books include the "lucid, funny and illuminating" (The Sunday Times) The Sister Knot (ISBN 978 0 393 33062 5); The Confident Child (ISBN 978 0 393 32896 7), "one of those texts whose reputation has been spread by word of mouth" (The Times Educational Supplement); The "excellent" (The Observer) Myth of Maturity (ISBN 978 0 393 32317 7); and the "wise and understanding" (The Times Educational Supplement) You Don't Really Know Me (ISBN 978 0 393 32710 6).See all Editorial Reviews
It was a good read, had scenarios that were relatable and I thought it provided a good wholesome view of certain situations where it's really hard to understand where someone else... Read morePublished 1 month ago by Lilian R.
Good Book. Real Facts. Real examples. I love that it gives you both perspectives: Mother-in law point of view and Daughter in Law point of viewPublished 2 months ago by DSS
This book assumes that your mother-in-law's active presence in your life is inevitable and appeasing her therefore essential, no matter how difficult she is. Read morePublished 12 months ago by gummybear555
I have found this book to be most helpful and insightful. I felt like Dr. Apter was talking directly to me. Read morePublished 13 months ago by Hilary Nachbar
If you're into psychology books (which I am) then you will enjoy this read. I sampled "Toxic Inlaws" and found it a little too 'us vs. Read morePublished 16 months ago by BHE
This book addresses in-law contention with a focus on mother-in-law/daughter-in-law contention. I would recommend this to someone who is not yet married or who has only minor... Read morePublished on September 11, 2013 by KatSR
This book was extremely helpful in explaining why getting along with in-laws is so tough--specifically why it's so difficult for wives and mother-in-laws to get along. Read morePublished on July 30, 2013 by L. Anderson
The book is very badly written & poorly organized. I don't recommend it. It was a waste of my time & useless to me.Published on January 3, 2013 by J. Benedict
The transaction with Amazon was amazing. The book arrived extremely fast and in great condition! The book itself, however, was not that helpful to me. Read morePublished on December 29, 2011 by doobie060