247 of 262 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Thumbs Up-What does that tell you?, October 11, 2009
This review is from: What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People (Paperback)
I thought some of the negative reviews were a bit critical of this book. This book lays a solid foundation to reading non verbal actions or "tells". I've read several other books on this subject and thought this was a solid read and I was very happy with my purchase. There is no single book offered that will turn you into an expert over night.
It is important to realize that reading people is a skill. You don't become great at it over night or an expert right after reading the book. Just like any other skill, you have to practice and work at it. You develop the skill of paying attention and picking up on the little things. Once you are able to do that, you then have to determine what all of those things mean. I'm a single male, small business owner and avid poker player. Being able to read people can be very useful in dating, business and at the poker table.
One thing that is very interesting is that some actions or "tells" are very common and seem to always mean the same thing. Other actions or "tells" are unique to each person. What may mean one thing for one person, may actually mean the opposite when done by another person. The "magic" of being able to read people is being able to determine what those actions mean for individual people. Sometimes it's not an action at all but it is what people DON'T say or do that can paint you the entire picture.
In my business, I use my ability to read people to determine whether or not they are being truthful or are uncomfortable with something. If I see them acting in a certain way that makes me believe they are uncomfortable, I go out of my way to explain things to them so that they might be more comfortable with the situation or outcome. In my personal life, I can determine whether or not my friends or family are having a good or bad day and/or might want or need something. This book should be a dating book as well. I can't stand dating. Not many people are very up front and honest about how they feel about another person, especially on a first date. I am not kidding you when I say that there are more non-verbal "tells" on a first date than in any other situation! If you want to know if a woman likes you or not, pay attention to her actions throughout the date. I'm not an expert, but I think I can figure it out in 10 minutes or less! (Good or bad!....ok, mostly bad, lol)
I enjoy playing poker. I play in home games and I play $1/$2 No Limit Hold Em in the casino poker rooms. This book really is a big help with poker tells. It's helped me make some extraordinary calls and folds. Several times I've stunned the entire table and the dealers with my reads. Just a few things off of the top of my head are, people who've made very strong hands will often tilt their heads while betting or thinking of betting, hold their hands together-touching only at the finger tips, bounce one leg like crazy (happy feet), slide their chips into the pot very slowly or gently or give off a genuine smile. People who have hit the flop also tend to look away right away if they notice they've hit their card(s). Normally people who hit the flop do not stare at the flop. People who are on drawing hands tend to call bets very quickly, seeming to give it no thought what-so-ever. People who have a poor hand or are on a bluff often force a smile (there is a difference if you pay attention!), or purse their lips together, have an increased blink rate, forcefully bet chips into the pot or speak very loudly as they announce "RAISE" or "ALL IN". They are trying to scare you or force you out of the pot. After reading this book, my poker reads went through the roof. I think it is because I was paying attention and putting more effort into it. I noticed another player at my home game would sometimes slide his chips into the pot without saying a word when he was all in. He keeps his chips in a big messy pile throughout the game. But sometimes he would actually take the time to count his chips and stack them neatly into the pot when he moved all in. He takes his time counting his chips and then announces the value amount to the table. When he counts them, he is bluffing. He wants his stack to be known in hopes of scaring off the other opponents. I call him with very weak holdings when he does this and I fold when he slides his chips into the pot without counting them or saying a word. He has no idea he is doing this and I'm not about to say a word! This tell is 100%. I actually saw another player do this in the casino and I made an extraordinary call to win the pot.
This book is full of good information to use in many situations. It teaches you the basics (and then some), but it is up to you to figure out how to put theory into practice and actually stay focused.
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267 of 284 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Advice from a 30 year law enforcement vet- BUY THIS BOOK!, April 15, 2009
This review is from: What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People (Paperback)
I have been in law enforcement for close to 30 years on a large agency- I am always on the lookout for useful tools of the trade that I can use and pass along to my investigators. This book is great! It is packed with useful information. No, I am not a shill for this book and do not know the author- although I have met many professional law enforcement investigators who have written good books and manuals. I am impressed with the insights and natural techniques contained in this book. I am ordering a copy for all the investigators in my unit, I am that impressed with this book. Sure, there is always something about any book that does not satisfy a reader- but I honestly must say there is little about this book that I didn't like.
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154 of 166 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great book, a must read for people wanting to understand the Reasons Behind our body language., November 12, 2008
This review is from: What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People (Paperback)
Just finished the book this week, and I must say I am quite happy with my purchase! This is a great book that gives a very nice understanding of the limbic part of our brain (A part that reacts without conscious thought) and the reasons behind our body language to understand WHY the brain reacts with these certain resposes in our body language. One of the biggest troubles i'v had with body language is memerising what all the parts mean. But with this understanding of the Limbic brain I can now understand the WHY behind all the parts, and like other reviewers have said, this makes memorising SO MUCH easier as it changed the way I look at Body language.
For anyone really interested in body language, I would recommend you buy this book which will give you a great base understanding of the science behind our body language And then buy the "Definitive Book Of Body Language" Which in my view is like the "encyclopedia" of body language, These are the Must reads for Body language in my view. The combination of the two is really a knock out punch for a very good foundation in the understanding of Body Language.
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