Customer Reviews

What Happy Working Mothers Know: How New Findings in Positive Psychology Can Lead to a Healthy and Happy Work/Life Balance

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2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

I am a working father, generally happy, but currently more grumpy than usual: the economy, the weather (Chicago winter approaches) and my dear son's evolution into dictatorial toddler. This book has done wonders for my mood, my approach to life and my plans.

I actually like the fact that its teaching is in multiple narratives--central text interspersed with sidebars, charts and sketches--because these "bite-sized" nuggets of empathy, heroism, and yes, sheer wisdom, are perfect for busy working parents. I read it in spurts, dive back to recall a lesson, true story or insight and hold it in my head for the day.

Another reviewer complained that this book repeats the "What Happy People Know" messages. Sure it does. That's the point. Those messages are timeless truths that are worth repeating. In this book they've been synthesized and adapted for working parents. I really appreciate that, even though I usually don't read books that claim to speak to just one of the many roles I play in life. I usually steer away from something so specific--a whole book about happy working mothers? No thanks! Smug people who have figured out how to raise kids, succeed at work, honor your spouse and love yourself? Please, take your success stories elsewhere! I was so wrong. Greenberg and Avigdor share their lessons in happiness for all to learn. And they do it gently, positively and transparently. I've been humbled.

I share this book with parents who need uplifting and I recommend others to do so. And who doesn't need uplifting now and again? I'm a better man for having read this book.

In the book What Happy Working Mothers Know, they talk with a lot of working mothers regarding what they do to make their life happy. What it boils down to, is finding a balance between work and home and in the end (according to the book) not feeling guilty for your choices. While I agree you shouldn't feel guilty for your choice to work (because I for one am NOT meant to be a stay at home mom!), I think I would be more happy if there were more hours in a day! I just can't find time to do everything that needs to get done. In the book, they do talk about prioritizing your time. Spend those 30 mins with the kids instead of vacuuming - vacuuming can be done later. While I do agree with prioritizing, there does come a point, when you can't push it off anymore.

The one thing I didn't like about this book was its entire chapter (it seemed) on divorce and how to get through it etc. I'm not quite sure how that is supposed to help working mothers be happy. One of the authors went through a divorce so I can only surmise that is the reason for such in depth inclusion regarding divorce and how to handle/get through it was included with the book.

Overall, I thought this was a good book. I will go back and do/re-do some of the exercises they talked about in the book to kind of let you figure out what will make you happy and how to get to that point. They were definitely thought provoking and a great way to try to get you to your happy point. However, in the end, only you can make yourself happy. No book can do it for you!

A quick, enjoyable read full of revealing personal insights from top opinion makers, such as Dee Dee Meyers, to regular folks, every manager of people needs to read this book. Don't let the title fool you: the book could easily be called The Busy Person's Reality Guide to Happiness. Everyone can benefit from the authors' masterful integration of science and practice into a realistic and user-friendly approach that you can easily grasp and put to work immediately in the work and family settings. In addition to their own research and other new findings, the authors simply and clearly explain some established concepts that are often misportrayed or garbled in less expert hands. Let's hope for more soon from the Greenberg/Avigdor team!

We older mothers needed this book when our kids were little. Cathy Greenberg and Barrett Avigdore have done a fantastic job of providing it in a way that is neither condescending nor insulting. They state "Our goal is to give you the tools to engage your whole brain, help you develop awareness, and learn to perform at your best every day." This is neither a "we have an ax to grind" book nor a "let's make the best of a bad situation" book. Rather it is a "User's Manual" for women in the work force based on the new science of Positive Psychology. It addresses the issues facing "Working mothers" in a positive, constructive way. (I must admit , though, that I find the term "working mother" an oxymoron - is there such a thing as a mother who doesn't work? Motherhood takes more energy, more creativity and more abilities than any job I know.) This book addresses head on how you fill the role of mother, happily hold down a job and be true to yourself as a human being.

The authors found a nice balance between presenting information, illustrating the topic with examples from "real life" women, and offering exercises that allow you to come to your own conclusions about what you need for you. I found it refreshing that the authors do not try to tell you what to think, what to believe or how to act. Rather they present the issue and help you work your way to a solution that works best for you.

This book address such issues as learning to love yourself, dealing with guilt, forgiveness, gender differences, letting go of the "perfect mother" syndrome and what happens to the children when you work - or when you don't work. Every mother, whether she's in the work force or not, should read the chapter on guilt and do all the exercises over and over until she "gets it" and lets go of the guilt that lurks overtly or covertly within her.

I love the "self awareness" exercises in this book. Each chapter has its "self coaching breaks" and "Bottom Line Exercises" that help you apply the concepts to your own life in your own way! If the reader takes these seriously and does them thoughtfully, she will be light years ahead by the time she finishes the last exercise.

This book should be widely read by men as well as women. They need to understand the tremendous talent and ability women bring to both the home and the workplace and they need to be open to finding their own happiness. As a society we haven't thought much about happiness - especially on the job - and it's time we did.

In addition, every girl in her teens should have access to the questions and exercises in this book so she can transition into the workforce with much more ease and grace than those of us from the "dark ages" have done. A career choice based on self awareness and the principles of happiness will make a significant difference in the lives of women entering the work place and motherhood in the years to come.

The authors sum it up in the last chapter when they write, "If we follow our dreams, pursue our goals, live our values, and love ourselves as we are, everyone wins. Our children and families win because we are happier and less stressed, our fellow workers and our companies win because we are more productive and creative. When you are happy, you are the best version of you. Happiness is the tide that lifts all the boats in your life."

I highly recommend this book.

This book really helped me with my transition back to the office. I had such anxiety and needed real tools and data to calm me and make me see the bigger picture and analize my choices in a healthy manner. Good mix of real experiences, science and practical wisdom. I also liked that it was not just a pat on th eback to working moms but a deeper discussion of the issues around child rearing and personal happiness.

As both a Mother and working professional, I have found 'What Happy Working Mothers Know' to be the very best, refreshing, sensible and useful book for all mothers. And lets face it, all of us work if we are mothers. Even if we don't have professional careers, being a good mother is practically a full time job in itself. For those of us who do try to balance one or more professions, a business of our own, a classroom, or anything other than home and motherhood, you will be very happy, very quickly that you bought and read, 'What Happy Working Mothers Know'.

This book can provide new ways of looking at things that will literally "open your eyes" to overcoming so much of the daily stresses, griefs and gripes that we as working mothers are forced to carry...often on our own. From how to balance your life to emotional healing, making better parenting judgements, and even how to be happier and more productive in your professional life,this book covers it all for you, along with the facts to back up the authors' statements and guidance.

As a working professional mother myself I would recommend three books, all easy to read and great to refer back to, as being the best $40. a working mother can spend on Amazon.
1. 'What Happy Working Mothers Know' 2. 'Wisdom & Wisecracks for Aspiring Business Owners' (lots of female,parenting, and business related female quotes and good sound moral advice) 3. 'Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide' (A must read for all women aspiring to be better at anything, and a great read for the men who believe in them).

I'm having a truly hard time getting through this book. This is glossy pop-psychology at it's worst. Consider the following quotes:

"78 percent of mothers say they are 'fulfilled.'"
"62 percent of women describe themselves as 'very ambitious.'"
"Nearly 90 percent of working mothers like working..."
"More than 74 percent of working mothers are satisfied that their work/life balance is always (Always? Really? Always?) or most of the time right.'"
"Happiness is a sense of the possible. You feel that things are possible. You feel bouncy,"

Anybody know a a big group of bouncy, fulfilled, very ambitious, working mothers who are satisfied that their work/life balance is always or most of the time right? This isn't positive thinking - it's delusional and is an insult to the intelligence of women who know better. The effectiveness of positive thinking requires a baseline grasp of reality. "Feel good" cheerleading doesn't cut it. Worse, it can demoralize women who aren't reflected in the outrageous percentages quoted above.

Working American mothers are better served by literature which recognizes, and dissects up front, the paralyzing demands and wrenching compromises they face (my children, my health, or my pension?), and follows up with an intelligent and empathetic discussion of how to keep it together, rejoice in often unrecognized accomplishments, nurture gratitude for our many blessings, and find peace with the decisions and losses. You won't find it here.

Now I get it! Never much for self-help tomes, I have always admired the role of the working mother (or parent, for that matter!) in the workplace, from administrative assistant to executive... and how they seem to make parenting happen. I never thought it was easy! Yes, much of the book's guidance is obvious... or should be, but here in the book reinforced by some incredible "Mother's Stories" that might well make the reader's own experiences pale by comparison.

But there's a sense of community well stated here, whether as a working mother or working father, that no one parent is, or should be, alone when making work/family scenarios happen positively... and happily.

When women leave the house and go to work outside the family, they often find life more difficult and demanding. We find ourselves trying to be everything to everyone, which becomes an impossible task. What Happy Working Mothers Know, helps mothers rediscover their happiness. It celebrates the working mother and suggests ways to balance a sometimes hectic lifestyle. I found it to be a user-friendly guide, with easy-to-follow exercises.

I lost interest around half way through the book. I did finish it and there were some additional points that were good in the rest of the book, but it didn't hold my full attention through out the etire book.