What Wives Wish their Husbands Knew about Sex: A Guide for Christian Men [Paperback]

Ryan Howes (Author), Richard Rupp (Author), Stephen W. Simpson (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 1, 2007

It's an unfortunate reality that many men grow up in churches that suppress their God-given sexual urges. As a result, many Christian men, single and married, are frustrated with their love lives and their sex lives. The authors of this book claim that Christian men should be the greatest lovers in the world and then work to show men how to do it. They help men: -learn what the Bible says about a healthy sex life -discover how to relate to women as men instead of as boys -address psychological and spiritual issues that interfere with healthy sexuality -learn specific techniques that create a strong relationship, great foreplay, and passionate sex Solidly based in Scripture and informed by the experiences of the authors, all respected sex therapists, What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew about Sex dispels the myths that keep good Christian men from experiencing sex as God meant it to be. Perfect for any man, it is also a great book for counselors and pastors who work with men.

Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

FRONT COVER "A straightforward, no holds barred, entertaining manual for Christian men."--Neil Clark Warren, founder and chairman, eHarmony.com BACK COVER A candid guide to men's sexuality In the beginning God created man and woman--and sex. But men and women don't always see sex in the same way. This straight-talking guide helps men understand the difference--and helps women appreciate it too. Here are the facts of sexuality as you never heard them growing up--explicit, yet honest and accurate--minus the winks, nudges, and snickers. In great depth and with much candor, the authors explore the biblical, psychological, emotional, and physical aspects of making love. • Gain new insights into your own sexual makeup and the desires of your wife • Discover the most important thing to a woman • Learn how to become a better lover • See why knowing Christ can free a man to experience amazing love and incredible sex with his wife Whether you're married or planning to be someday, this is a must-read. "The authors have reclaimed sex as God's good gift, meant to be lavishly and extravagantly enjoyed by men and women who want the fullness of intimacy that God intended."--Linda M. Wagener, associate dean of the school of psychology, Fuller Seminary "This book breaks the fears and destructive guilt of Christianity into its true design to follow the real principles of sexual love as it was meant to be"--Frank Lawlis, author, The ADD Answer and The IQ Answer "Combining candor with humor, frankness with sensitivity, and professional knowledge with personal experience, this book offers a delightful overview of what husbands need to know about sex."--Jack Balswick, coauthor of Authentic Human Sexuality and A Model for Marriage Ryan Howes, Richard Rupp, and Stephen W. Simpson are psychotherapists who specialize in marriage and men's issues.

About the Author

Ryan Howes (Ph.D., Fuller Theological Seminary) is a therapist in private practice who specializes in helping men overcome sexual issues. He is an adjunct faculty member at Fuller Theological Seminary and Pepperdine University. Richard Rupp (M.F.T., Fuller Theological Seminary) is a licensed marriage and family therapist at Pasadena Psychotherapy Center and has taught at Fuller Seminary. He is a frequent speaker at men's conferences and retreats. Stephen Simpson (Ph.D., Fuller Theological Seminary) is the director of the Fuller Psychological and Family Services and is an adjunct professor at the seminary.

Product Details

• Paperback: 176 pages
• Publisher: Baker Books (April 1, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 080106774X
• ISBN-13: 978-0801067747
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.3 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #145,218 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #76 in Books > Religion & Spirituality > Religious Studies > Gender & Sexuality

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

18 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Written by men...for men, April 6, 2007

By 

Armchair Interviews (Minneapolis, MN) - See all my reviews

This review is from: What Wives Wish their Husbands Knew about Sex: A Guide for Christian Men (Paperback)

Imagine a how-to book written by three sex therapists who all happen to be both a) male and b) Christian. Does this shatter your paradigms or merely stretch them?

The authors of What Wives Wish fit both categories--male and Christian--while also serving various counseling, teaching and therapy roles at Fuller Seminary. Writing with an unflinchingly graphic attention to detail, these writers explain how Christian men can satisfy their wives sexually, while fitting sexuality into a balanced, nuanced place within the context of a loving, satisfying, mutually fulfilling relationship.

An excellent pre-marriage read for men, the book brings a relaxed, comfortable style to discussions of highly specific sexual techniques. While doing so, the authors are careful to explore the other dimensions of human relationships: spiritual, emotional and interpersonal. Although sexuality per se is given primary attention, men are encouraged and at times admonished to become more sensitive, more aware, and more patient.

If anything is missing here, it's the female voice or the feminine perspective, yet this is a book written by men and for men. At times it has a "Christian locker room" flavor, with some of the sex talk couched in metaphorical language drawn from Song of Solomon and other Biblical passages. Real-life couples may not be ready to rephrase their sexual language in Scriptural terms, yet they may be surprised to learn that the Bible is excellent source material for graphic, seductive sexual imagery.

The authors are clear in their intention to write for Christian married men, hoping to help Christian marriages achieve better depth and satisfaction in the bedroom. As such, they have written a helpful and useful guide that is worthwhile reading for its target audience of married and soon-to-be married males.

Armchair Interviews says: Unique perspective on marriage.

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Straight forward and humorous, April 12, 2007

By 

Gert - See all my reviews

This review is from: What Wives Wish their Husbands Knew about Sex: A Guide for Christian Men (Paperback)

Honestly, we bought this book because one of the authors is an old friend of ours. But we were amazed, even after 12 years of marriage and good sex, how much our love life could improve. I also bought another copy for a wedding gift - why not start off great? I think this will become a standard wedding gift for our friends this summer. Read and enjoy!

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Clear, Candid, Useful, June 25, 2008

By 

Dr. David Frisbie (Rancho Santa Fe, CA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: What Wives Wish their Husbands Knew about Sex: A Guide for Christian Men (Paperback)

Here's an up-to-date guide to married sexuality, written with rare candor and remarkable clarity. Be aware: this book goes places that previous books about sexuality within (Christian) marriage have not gone before.

A great gift for pre-married couples; a helpful guide for married couples who want to improve their communication about sexual issues or develop a closer and more unified sex life. This book is both prescriptive and descriptive; be aware of that also.

The authors remind us that great relationships are about many factors beyond the physical; there are tips and hints here that will help husbands and wives bond and connect outside the bedroom and away from sexual experiences. Even so, this is primarily a 'bedroom book' and is best understood from that perspective.

Given the explicit nature of these discussions, this is adult reading.

Dr. David & Lisa Frisbie
The Center for Marriage & Family Studies
Authors of: The Soul-Mate Marriage: The Spiritual Journey of Becoming One