Customer Reviews

What's a Mother (in-Law) to Do?: 5 Essential Steps to Building a Loving Relationship with Your Son's New Wife

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Having been a daughter-in-law for a while, I wondered, while reading What's A Mother (in-Law) to Do, if I would learn anything new to guide me in understanding that complicated relationship between a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law. During this easy read, I found myself mentally taking notes about my behavior with my own mother-in-law regarding boundaries, respect, our friendship, and her involvement in mine and my husband's relationship. While I have a good relationship with my own mother-in-law, I discovered a new respect for her and my husband's relationship -- the one that existed way before I came along.

Jane Angelich has managed to take a massive amount of information and research and squeezed it into an easy to follow book that gives clear directions and examples of behavior for anyone reading to follow. What's A Mother (in-Law) to Do offers readers not only clear advice, but examples of problems and pitfalls that others have experienced. From these typical problems, Angelich offers tactics on how to handle, understand and respect the other side of your husband's (or son) 's relationship.

Whether this is new territory for you as a wife, or you're a seasoned mother-in-law, What's A Mother (in-Law) to Do offers perspective and advice that helps you understand and better your relationship.

Never preachy, always thoughtful and illuminating, this book actually works as a refresher/primer for most of our relationships. Obviously the author spent a lot time researching the dynamics of the infamously tricky relationships that marriage creates. I loved the quotes, and the examples of real solutions from real people made this a very readable book. Although the title refers to building a loving relationship with your Son's new wife, I think this book is perfect for mothers of both the bride and the groom.
What's a Mother (in-Law) to Do?: 5 Essential Steps to Building a Loving Relationship with Your Son's New Wife

This is a small, short (131 pages) book which can be finished in an afternoon. There are only five chapters: 1 Hold Your Tongue, 2 Embrace Her, 3 Keep Out, 4 Don't Ask, Don't Tell and 5 Be a Role Model. Angelich's advice is basically be flexible, don't expect your son and daughter-in-law to do things your way and give them some privacy. There really isn't much new here; if you care enough to want to have a good relationship with your son's wife, you will probably be doing most of this already. (Don't expect them to spend EVERY holiday with you or pressure her to change her religion as my MIL did.). Apparently Angelich hopes to write a follow-up book, because at the end she invites readers to share their stories. She also includes a few thoughts about the possible effect of birth order on relationships.
Decades ago, a new mother-in-law wrote to Ann Landers asking for advice about being a good MIL. Her pithy reply was "Keep your purse open and your mouth shut. That still works.

My friend recommended Jane Angelich's new book to me, since my son is engaged to be married next summer. I had been looking on line to find books on this subject matter in the last month and was so happy to see that it had just come out. It's an easy read in which the author incorporates through her research, excerpts from real life stories that people had sent her through a survey ... and also, she relates her own family experiences, sometimes with a dry sense of humor. A lot of the other books I found while looking on line usually are depicting a mother-in-law in such a negative way. This book gives so many helpful ideas to get off to a good start right from the beginning ... giving pointers from planning the wedding all the way through expecting a grandchild.




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I have to admit, I really liked this book. I did have to wait for it for almost a year and had even given up on it, but despite that, I really liked it. My teenage children are beginning to bring their boyfriends and girlfriends around the house, and when I was reading the book, I thought that I could even apply the principles the author suggests to male children-in-law, too. Recommended reading for any woman that has to face that daunting task of letting her children go