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When AA Doesn't Work For You: Rational Steps to Quitting Alcohol

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Virtually everyone knows of AA and its efforts to address problem drinking -- it is the largest, most visible and most accessible group, and the group that most entering recovery will either gravitate towards or be directed to by the therapy community. Yet, AA, for all of its benefits, doesn't work as a program for everyone -- particularly for those who are not spiritually inclined (and don't want to have to become spiritually inclined in order to recover) or those who are more cognitively-oriented people. There are thankfully alternatives to AA available for those who seek them out, and the "RET" (rational-emotive therapy) approach founded by Dr. Ellis, and which is the foundation of the SMART Recovery approach to recovery, is well outlined in this easy-to-read, easy-to-understand book.

The basic idea is very simple ... you are not powerless over alcohol as AA says but rather you are empowered, or exercising your power, every time you make a decision in life about anything, including the decision to drink. When you drink even in spite of the fact that your drinking is interfering with your life goals (as you define them) or causing you tangible problems (legal, financial, relationship, career, etc.), then you have a good sign that your decision-making process around drinking alcohol needs some examination. RET is a technique that helps the individual drill down into her cognitive processes and isolate the real mental issues underlying her decision to keep drinking under these circumstances. In particular, a lot of attention is paid to "stinking thinking", which in RET terms means underlying beliefs we may have about ourselves, the world around us and others that are irrational, self-defeating, and lead us to make the decision to drink. RET teaches the individual how to unearth these often hidden, reflexive beliefs, examine them, challenge them, and replace them with healthier, rational, self-helping beliefs, ones which will not lead one to make the irrational decision to problem drink. RET also teaches how to relate more healthily to life's frustrations and disappointments by placing them in perspective, not overblowing them, and developing a higher frustration tolerance over time ... in other words, how to deal more effectively with the frustrating things in life, in ourselves, and in others that may have led us in the past to decide to drink. In all, RET teaches the individual to be much more aware of what is going on inside themselves, to be much more in control of that interior situation, or at least be able to manage it and relate to it more effectively, and thereby to make better choices about how to act ---- rather than being largely unaware of what is happening interiorly, but nonetheless being subjected to what may be a somewhat or largely irrational set of interior beliefs, whether we are aware or not, and acting accordingly.

In all, it is a wonderful approach, for some people. I don't believe that this approach is for everyone (and neither is AA), but if the AA approach isn't working for you (see title of the book), and particularly if you are the kind of person who is more cognitively oriented, then Ellis' approach of RET is certainly worth a read, and just may hold the key to your own recovery.

This is easily one of the best books on addictions around. Ellis and his co-author lucidly describe the dynamics of abusive and self-destructive drinking in such a way that the individual's self-responsibility is maximized and the "addiction excuse" eliminated. While this approach often brings wails of protest from persons still committed to drinking as much as they want to while still "looking good" (at least to themselves), in the long run it is precisely the honesty of the Ellis approach which is the most effective means around to overcome abusive, self-defeating and suicidal drinking habits. Ellis also looks at issues relating to life without alcohol, and in his typical "take no prisoners" approach using the principles of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, shows how to overcome the most common "after the party's over" problems of the ex-abusive drinker. This book is a must read if you either drink destructively yourself, or interact with an abusive drinker

If the 12-steps aren't working for you, this book might. You don't have to have a disease, you don't have to be powerless, you don't need a higher power, you don't need to "recover" for the rest of your life. This book will show you modern methods to use to attain recovery from drugs or alcohol.

As someone who feels that the only self-help book that anyone ever needs is David Burns' "Feeling Good," I was charmed to learn that Albert Ellis was the vanguard thinker of this cognitive approach to all. And here I find it applied to abusive drinking! What a treat, and at a crucial time.

Basically, the book shows you how you can teach yourself to analyze thoughts about drinking and to re-channel your actions. I find its logic unquestionable. VERY, very accepting of people, it makes me feel markedly more tranquil just reading it.

This book is not only helpful, but it's funny, also. Ellis is a rather salty person, sprinkling his writing with expletives here and there, which makes this logical, very useful book a giggle right when I needed one. I have heard some say that he's too rough in his language, but I find it a refreshing change, and a necessary one in the face of the real crudeness of alcohol abuse and the life it entails.

In response to the other reviewer who suggests that somehow his brother's suicide was precipitated by Ellis (!), I simply have to recap his constant allusion to the idea that no one can "make" you do anything. You choose to do everything that you do. Obviously, some people are too disturbed to think through it (this man evidently was)-- but for those who can -- it's awesome.

I found this title in a mainstream bookstore, among tomes of 12-step books...a ratio I propose to change if I am at all able to do so!

I am going to buy another title on the next "click!"

I've been recovering from alcholism for about 9 months now, and after a stint in an AA-oriented rehab I've been attending meetings on a regular basis. The problem is, I'm just not wired for all of the spirituality that's necessary for an AA recovery (according to AA, that is). I've got nothing against AA, I think it's a great organization; however, it's just not doing the job for me.

The ideas expressed in this book, stripped of all the RET jargon, are not new: ultimately, you are the one who chooses to drink, become aware of the thought processes involved and perhaps you will choose differently. That appeals to me. To be honest, I'm sick of fretting over the power alcohol has over me, and I like the idea that I have some control over my own destiny.

The book gets a little redundant after a while, and I wouldn't say the writing style is the easiest to follow, but the ideas expressed have really clicked with me. If you are an AA-believer, you will probably find this book somewhat offensive. If you are struggling with the AA concept, this book is certainly worth a read.

Those looking for something easier than AA may be disappointed, because the program outlined in this book requires a lot of work, but that's just what makes it effective. Despite the title, I would recommend this book to both AA members and non-members. For those who have trouble with AA's outdated religious terminology, Ellis and Velten provide a solution in modern, secular, easy to understand language backed by scientific research. For those in AA, I think it would make a good adjunct to their 12-step spiritual program. In fact, in spite of the language, AA's inventory process seems to have much in common with the ABC's of REBT outlined in the book. Either way, personal change takes a lot of self-examination, and work!

Everywhere we are bombarded with false statistics that are invented and propogated by the AA followers.The fact remains that the MOST sucessful people to quit their addictions do it on their own-please see the Harvard News Letter.
Dr. Ellis' book can and does augment peoples ability to quit,for good,their self destuctive tendancies including substance abuse.
Factual analysis of the why we become addicted are presented here in an easy to understand format.It is our irrational beliefs about ourselves and the world that lead to frustration,depression and addiction.
I practise this philosophy daily in dealing with my husbands' cancer and my own patients illnesses.It calms me and helps me to deal with life on lifes terms and not the way it should be.
If you rely on your ability to think to lead you through life then this book is a great way to help structure your thoughts into a benefical program not only for substance abuse but for accepting whatever life may throw at you at any moment.

While applying REBT to addiction and recovery may seem cumbersome at first, it DOES work and there are many many people that have recovered by applying the ideas and techniques presented in this book.

Ellis's REBT is a basis for SMART Recovery, and this book basically shows the REBT aspects of SMART.

Another reviewer has pointed to the Small Book of Rational Recovery as an alternative to this book, however, the primary author of that book no longer agrees with it's contents. The Small Book IS however, still on the recommended reading list at SMART.

Overall, this book provides excellent examples of applying REBT to alcohol and addiction issues.

You've read the reviews. And if you're interested in this book all you really want to know is "does this book contain something that will help me stop drinking?"
The short answer, like everything else you might try, is "Possibly". It's a good start for some of us. Here's why:
If you've tried A.A. and found it didn't work, then you're looking for something more logical and rational than a spiritual change or complete overhaul in your thinking. This is what A.A. offers. The fact is that this change is absolutely needed if you're going to remain sober. What this book focuses on is the rational approach as opposed to A.A.'s often spiritual approach. Where you might have difficulties is that there is nothing logical or rational about addiction; however, the book is straight forward and easy to read. There are no hidden phrases to be interpreted by a scientist.
A.A. doesn't have a monopoly on sobriety. It does have the highest success rate of any therapy, but the former reviewer (obviously a member of A.A. like I am) is incorrect in stating that A.A. has a 100% success rate. That's not accurate, whatever the reasons we can give. But don't despair - all is not lost.
If you are one of the few people that can't click in A.A. or simply won't adjust, the chances are that this or any other book won't be much help to you because you may not be completely willing to start the process, even if you feel you are. This is where a support group and like minded people to talk to and work with, be it A.A., family, friends, etc. is -extremely- important.
Barring that, this is one of the few books outside of A.A. literature that I would recommend to someone interested in beating the alcoholic problem. Pick up a copy and see if it has what you need. The other reviews are well written and tell more about the book. I would like to encourage you to do whatever you can, whatever you are willing to try, to live happy. Sobriety is the key to happiness if you're an alcoholic.
I tried A.A. - it didn't work. I read this book - it didn't work. I went back to A.A. and now I'm am doing great and I'm as happy as I've ever been.
Give this book a chance if you're at this point. Reaching out and trying something - anything - is a good first step to get comfortable with the idea that you can do this. You can.
If it doesn't work, A.A. will still be there with open arms and understanding people. Here's hoping this book is all it takes for you. Best of luck.
-We're not bad people trying to get good. We are sick people trying to get well.

Dr. Ellis has done it again! (I must not be spiteful or digressfrom the contents of this book or I will be breaking the guidelines ofAmazon.com). So I will just state the truth instead. Ellis has claimed RET for himself and Dr. Beck. Well, it was created by Dr. Low in 1937. Jack Trimpey invented RR as an alternative to alcohol with "The Small Book". Using cognitive- behavioral principles. Ellis wrote the intro. Then he coveted RR with this book. If you are an athiest, agnostic, and NOT a falling down drunk, give Jack's book, Rational Recovery, a try. I don't think it was a very kind thing for this man to do. I did read this book. And it does seem incredibly simple-minded in the extreme. While Jack acknowledges a mid-brian "thirst for the alcoholic which can be talked back to, Ellis is sticking totally to the A-B-C method for alcholism. The examples he gives are really funny. The client states that he had no thought about drinking. Then the RET therapist interrogates the client! "You must have had some thoughts". Finally, the client backs down and says "Yes! Yes! Alright! I did say something to myself I guess." Therapist: "Like wanting to drink?" "yes, yes, I must have said something to myself when I saw the liquor store! " This is called "therapeutic aggression" where the therapist aggressively forces the client to fit into the therapist's paradighm of the universe. The entire book is loaded with cases like this!

Jack's book is much better for people who are not going down the drain. The wording of this book is very bad. As if Ellis wrote it on the subway to one of his singing lectures. If you are a falling down drunk, go to A.A. A Rational-Emotive Therapist told me that she has had "good luck" with her clients going to Alchoholics Anonymous! And she just thinks the world of Albert Ellis. Yes, I was seeing her for help!