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When Am I Going to Be Happy?: How to Break the Emotional Bad Habits That Make You Miserable Mass Market Paperback – January 1, 1997

3.9 out of 5 stars 42 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

Learn to change the emotional bad habits that make you unhappy.

- Recognize Your Emotional Bad Habits (and start to break them)

- Throw Off Your Security Blanket (and accept that you can have happiness)

- Talk Tenderly To Yourself (and increase self-esteem)

- Use The "To You-Ness To Me-Ness" Technique (and respond to negative comments with firm conviction, not rage)

- Get Rid Of The Imposter Phenomenon (and stop devaluing yourself)

- Accept Praise (and cease being your own worst critic)

- Stop Measuring Your Self

From the Inside Flap

Learn to change the emotional bad habits that make you unhappy.


- Recognize Your Emotional Bad Habits (and start to break them)


- Throw Off Your Security Blanket (and accept that you can have happiness)


- Talk Tenderly To Yourself (and increase self-esteem)


- Use The "To You-Ness To Me-Ness" Technique (and respond to negative comments with firm conviction, not rage)


- Get Rid Of The Imposter Phenomenon (and stop devaluing yourself)


- Accept Praise (and cease being your own worst critic)


- Stop Measuring Your Self

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Product Details

  • Mass Market Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Bantam (November 1, 1989)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0553282158
  • ISBN-13: 978-0553282153
  • Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 0.8 x 6.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (42 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #193,935 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Mass Market Paperback
I bought this book on a whim and ended up reading it end to end, paperclipping most of it. I recommend it to anyone who feels insecure, guilty all of the time, and self-conscous as I have felt most of my life. I also refer to this book whenever I feel myself falling into a rut. Thank you Dr. Russianoff!
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By A Customer on June 20, 2004
Format: Mass Market Paperback
This is without doubt one of the best self help books I've ever read, I have been reading self help books for three years now trying to break free from the oughts and shoulds of life.
Its helping me find the authentic me and giving me a spine of self confidence to live life as I believe I'm meant to.
I thoroughly reccommend this book.
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Format: Mass Market Paperback
Although I have not finished the entire book, I see myself evolving into a different person. Someone who feels more assured about herself, more confident and more loving towards herself. This book does not provide immediate cures, but it allows you to become aware of what is going on in your mind and heart and gives you the choice to detangle those bad habits from your life.
Russianoff provides a well written account of the issues facing many supposedly-successful individuals today. The book is fun to read, easy to use and a great treat for a brief respite. The one thing that is embarrasing is the title of the book... it makes it hard to bring it out in public to read.
Thumbs up... you won't regret this purchase!
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Format: Mass Market Paperback
Vivid mental pictures and eye-opening advice for overcoming crippling and destructive emotional habits. Learn to deal with your "Insecurity Blankets", "Hidden Contracts", and "Center-of-the-Universe Syndrome" until you can finally proclaim "Aha, I See!". Your life will never be the same again.
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Format: Mass Market Paperback Verified Purchase
This is by far the best self help book I have ever read and can even imagine existing. I was having a rough patch, and bought 3 self help books from Amazon, I started one, it bored me, I moved to this, read it super fast, recommended it to everyone I know, and now feel like my other self help books don't even need to be read! This book is not boring like most, and it doesn't have a lot of boring and tedious exercises. It's a super easy read, entertaining and makes SO much sense!

These lessons should be taught in school. I've been seeing people on the street and thinking, "They need to read my book!" It addresses esteem issues, social issues, phobias, and on and on. The stuff in the book is quite easy to apply too. It's great. Get it. Get it for everyone you know who isn't perfectly happy. It changed my life in a way that I don't think many other self help books or even therapy could.
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Format: Mass Market Paperback Verified Purchase
I bought this book to attempt to help myself out of, you guessed it, my bad habits. I tend to get jealous, angry, and extremely bitter during the course of a day, to the point where I start taking my rage out in the form of cold shoulders to my friends and family. So I bought this to help me attempt to fix this.

What I found is more of the author's actual patient's stories (under an annoymous name of course) than actual steps to fix my habits. For the Inferiority chapter, for example, the author explains how the patient had an abusive husband who put all of his faults on her, making her feel inferior. She goes on to tell how she overcame this. But I'm not her, I don't have an abusive husband, so I can't really connect to this example. And there's not much beyond that.

The author also is in a way using a broken record technique to enforce her advice on you. You read one chapter, then in the next, she basically states the main idea of the previous chapter and applies it to this one. It gets very repitious.

Call me mislead, but I thought this book would help me break my habits, not tell me how others visited a phychiatrist and overcame their own.
2 Comments 39 of 47 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
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Format: Mass Market Paperback
This book is very easy to read and gets right to the point. The author is very insightful and really helps you to recognize your emotional bad habits and gives practical, almost simple (in a good way), suggestions to overcome them. It's easy to flip back to the reviews at the end of the sections for the main points to remember. I ordered a 2nd book for a close friend who is now reading it.
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Format: Mass Market Paperback
This book really should be required reading. Just reading it won't help you however, unless you apply the methods she outlines. I was a walking depressed, angry person until I read this book. My life hasn't been the same since. She describes how most people walk around thinking negative thoughts about themselves. Saying "I'm so fat. So clumsy, so stupid, so lousy, such a screw up etc." Even a little bit of this can be a cancer. Instead she says you should recognize you are human and praise yourself for every positive thing. No negative put down of yourself is healthy! This is the root of depression. She gives scenarios of real life people and described how she advised them on repairing their lives. Even now I still read it again and again, like a bible.
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