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When Homosexuality Hits Home: What to Do When a Loved One Says They're Gay Paperback – July 15, 2004

51 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Joe Dallas is an author, speaker, and pastoral counselor who conducts seminars nationwide. He is the founder of Genesis Biblical Solutions in Tustin, California, and has written six books on human sexuality from a Christian perspective, including such authoritative resources as the bestselling Desires in Conflict, The Complete Christian Guide to Understanding Homosexuality, and The Gay Gospel? His articles have been featured in Christianity Today magazine and the Journal of Psychology and Christianity, and he is a regular contributor to the Christian Research Journal.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Harvest House Publishers (July 15, 2004)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0736912010
  • ISBN-13: 978-0736912013
  • Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.5 x 0.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (51 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #241,239 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I'm a Christian author, husband and father of two, married to my lovely wife Renee since 1987. We fellowship at Newport Mesa Church in Orange County, CA, and I run a ministry in Tustin, CA, called Genesis Counseling. Most of my writing has focused on sexual issues from a conservative Christian perspective, and since 1987, I've been honored to work with men who want to resolve conflicts between their sexual behavior and their relationship with Christ.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

52 of 60 people found the following review helpful By lost in space on April 1, 2008
Format: Paperback
As a parent, I found this book to be extremely helpful. Mr. Dallas recognizes that each person will make their own decisions. We can't make decisions for them but we can control how we respond to them.

The most meaningful line in the book for me is this: "You may never agree on this issue, but you are committed to not letting this disagreement ruin your relationship." This focused my attitude on what had to happen so that I could live in peace with my child. Mr. Dallas helped me see how I could continue to show love for my child without comprimising my values.

I really liked the practcal advise in this book. There is a chapter on negotiating family boundries. He has some good suggestions for respecting everyones beliefs and comfort. I do not need to constantly tell my child my views on homosexuality; I have already told her. He also instructs us how to ask children about our fears for their lives as a homosexual person such as AIDS, drugs, and promiscuity. These things may or may not be a part of the person's life. It is ok to ask; your fears may be relieved. The book helped me feel more comfortable with asking questions about my child's life.

The book also talks about the possible causes of homosexuality. Is it genetic or environmental? He takes a more balanced aproach to this than most of the information I have read. He basically says that it is likely a combination of both factors.

I felt quite a bit of relief from reading this book. It is in line with my evangelical Christian belief system, but doesn't demand that I change my child. Mr. Dallas shows compassion for the gay person and his/her family members.

This book is directed toward Chrisians with a literal interpretation of the Bible. If you are not in this catagory you may disagree with the book. If you are in pain, because homosexuality conflicts with your Biblical views, it mahy help.
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful By Patrick J. Studabaker on November 13, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition
So few Christian books on the subject of homosexuality treat it as a subject to be talked about and group gay people as a whole. This book peaked my interest in that it appeared to deal with not only gay people as individual people but also the Christian family member/friend who is need of guidance.

The one thing this book does amazingly is highlight the importance of showing Christian love while not accepting the sin. This is the strongest point the book gets across.

The book also has an amazing help section for the Christian who is dealing with someone who is gay (other books are recommended for those struggling with being gay which the author points to).

He covers different aspects of who might have come out (brothers, husbands, friends, etc.) and writes individual chapters on them (close family, spouses, acquaintances, etc.). Which can be a helpful reference for those who are picking up the book for a specific person they need help with.

The author offers up his personal story and the stories of others to help make his point which is always very helpful when dealing with a subject that can be so personal.

The use of Scripture is a tad too sparse for me but there are a good enough number to root the author's thoughts in the Word which is the highest authority we have.

The book is laid out very straightforward without going into danger of being impersonal. The message of Christian love reigns supreme throughout the book and does not diminish feelings on either side of the conversation.

If you're looking for a book as a Christian who wants help in what to do with a gay family/friend, I would highly recommend this. Final Grade - A
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71 of 92 people found the following review helpful By Anonymous on August 11, 2004
Format: Paperback
I have really struggled with my thoughts and feelings about how to respond to a loved one who recently announced they were gay. I spent many hours considering how to engage in a way that was both loving and true to my own, strongly held, Christian beliefs.

This book is a real gift for those of us who hear the words, "I'm gay." Joe Dallas is Biblically centered (I believe), sensitive, and steadfast. I found particularly helpful chapters that speak specifically to moms and dads, brothers and sisters, spouses, and extended families.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Our 21 year old son recently informed us that he is gay. My husband and are devastated and grieving. This news has been a shock to both my husband and I as well as to our other children (grown), and we need to educate ourselves as to how we can best respond to our beloved son/brother in the most effective and loving way! We are a Christian family and our son believes he is a christian homosexual.

I can't begin to express how insightful and encouraging this book was to me! I read it all before noon today. I learned so much about the grief we as a family are experiencing and the stages that go along with our grief, how to better communicate and respond to our son, and I now feel better equipped to handle this life-altering situation! We dearly love our son, but do not feel practicing homosexuality is God's design. When I read this book I felt Joe Dallas was speaking directly to my family and me! I highly recommend this book! It hits the heart of the matter and since Joe Dallas has experienced homosexuality firsthand he can offer truths and insights that only come from one "who knows "!

I greatly appreciated and gleaned so much from each chapter, but especially gained knowledge from chapter 8, "A Mile in their Shoes", as well as the sample letter printed at the end of the book for my husband and I to utilize as a resource so we can write our own letter to our son which expresses our thoughts and all that's in our hearts in a loving, truthful, helpful and positive way!

This book was encouraging and made me realize we are not alone in this journey. May God guide and strengthen each of us who are in this most difficult situation!

Again A HUGE THUMBS UP for this book! 5 stars +!
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