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When No One Understands: Letters to a Teenager on Life, Loss, and the Hard Road to Adulthood Paperback – January 30, 2007


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When No One Understands: Letters to a Teenager on Life, Loss, and the Hard Road to Adulthood + The Good Enough Teen: Raising Adolescents with Love and Acceptance (Despite How Impossible They Can Be) + The Good Enough Child: How to Have an Imperfect Family and Be Perfectly Satisfied
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 160 pages
  • Publisher: Trumpeter (January 30, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1590304071
  • ISBN-13: 978-1590304075
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.4 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #989,513 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"A collection of sensitive, cogent, and touching observations and counsel on many of the universal themes facing adolescents as they try to navigate the tricky voyage from childhood to adulthood."—Spirituality & Practice 

"Sachs's letters are gems. . . . This excellent book will be savored again and again."—Library Journal (starred review) 

"Sachs's letters serve as an excellent model for encouraging communication with a teen. . . . If all adults could incorporate this kind of intrinsic respect into their conversations with adolescents, the world would be a wonderful place."—VOYA

"A book of unique kindness and clarity that will be comforting and illuminating to parents and teens alike."—Rosalind Wiseman, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence

About the Author

<p class="MsoNormal">Brad Sachs, PhD, is a family psychologist and the author of The Good Enough Child: How to Have an Imperfect Family and Be Perfectly Satisfied (HarperCollins, 2001) and The Good Enough Teen: Raising Adolescents with Love and Acceptance (Despite How Impossible They Can Be) (HarperCollins, 2005). He is also the founder and director of the Father Center and an active speaker, giving workshops and talks around the country to parents and mental health professionals. He lives in Maryland with his wife and three children.

Customer Reviews

4.1 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Mr. Stephen J. Biddulph on March 18, 2007
Format: Paperback
Brad Sachs care of a 16 year old girl who attempts suicide, using letters instead of awkward and embarrassing face to face interviews, is moving and impressive, but more than this, it sets down a road map for the key thing adolescents need - to be respected, understood, and attended to without trying to change or shape them to our needs. While sensitive to her parents fears, he slowly supports "Amanda" while she finds her own feet and clarifies her own understanding of her life and her family. Its the simple act of caring, caring enough to not mould or pressure or burden this girl, that begins slowly to set her free. Any parent of an adolescent would benefit from reading this lucid and well written set of letters. We all need to give teenagers more support, more understanding, which is not the same as passive toleration, but rather a real wish to know them, and yet give them their right to be separate people. His view that adolescence is often a period of intense LOSS, rather than the glowing idea we paint on it of freedom and independence, is a revelation, and goes far in explaining why it is so difficult and painful.

Though its always tempting for a therapist to boast in writing about a successful "case", and perhaps there is some element of this in even publishing such a book, the benefits for the reader, or for the more hide-bound

traditionalists in counselling work, are great. I think this book deserves a very wide audience, and "Amanda"

and teenagers everywhere deserve our admiration for their brave journey to selfhood.

Steve Biddulph (Launceston Australia - father, psychologist and author of Raising Boys, and The Secret Life of Men.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Midwest Book Review on April 6, 2007
Format: Paperback
Brad Sachs is a prominent child and family psychologist who brings a very special expertise to "When No One Understands: Letters To A Teenager On Life, Loss, And The Hard Road To Adulthood". This 144-page compendium of experienced based commentary and advice surveys and addresses commonly held concerns shared by teenagers and includes such topics as relationships, breakups, drugs and alcohol, parents, family dynamics, coping with loss, dealing with depression, and the necessity to put life events into a workable perspective. A gifted public speaker and workshop presenter, Sachs is also a talented writer who, as a psychologist and an author, is able to communicate with equal fluency to both teens and their parents, making "When No One Understands" highly recommended and thoroughly 'user friendly' reading and a welcome addition to community library collections and personal self-help reading lists.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Sheila Bender on December 15, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Dr. Brad Sachs' letters to a teen client suffering from deep depression and suicidal impulses offers a course in life everyone should take. His way of explaining behavior, how to handle dark emotions and frustration produce the feeling that understanding the logic of emotions rather than berating ourselves and others will help us free ourselves to honor life and participate with meaning. The letter form works beautifully as it is a form that allows for an elevation of thought while remaining intimate. Thank you for writing this book!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Thomas L. Israel on February 2, 2009
Format: Paperback
I purchased this book at the recommendation of a therapist who specializes in teenagers and their unique problems and struggles trying to grow up and relate to an adult world. I found it to be very relavent and well written, and even if you can't get your teenager to read it. I highly recommend it for any parent of a teenager. When No One Understands is as close to a user manual for parenting teenagers that I have found.
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More About the Author

Dr. Brad Sachs is a psychologist, speaker, educator and best-selling author specializing in clinical work with children, adolescents, couples, and families, in Columbia, Maryland, and the Founder and Director of The Father Center, a program designed to meet the needs of new, expectant, and experienced fathers.

His forthcoming book is entitled EMPTYING THE NEST: LAUNCHING YOUNG ADULTS TOWARDS SUCCESS AND SELF-RELIANCE (Macmillan/St. Martin's, July, 2010).

His most recent book, WHEN NO ONE UNDERSTANDS: LETTERS TO A TEENAGER ON LIFE, LOSS, AND THE HARD ROAD TO ADULTHOOD, was published in 2007, and is based on his between-sessions correspondence with a suicidal adolescent whom he was treating.

He is the author of numerous other books, including THE GOOD ENOUGH CHILD: HOW TO HAVE AN IMPERFECT FAMILY AND BE PERFECTLY SATISFIED (HarperCollins, 2001), which was named as an Editor's Choice by Amazon.com and became its best-selling parenting title that year. It was featured on NBC's The Today Show, and was excerpted in Family Circle Magazine.

He has also written THE GOOD ENOUGH TEEN: RAISING ADOLESCENTS WITH LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE (DESPITE HOW IMPOSSIBLE THEY CAN BE), (HarperCollins, 2005), and THINGS JUST HAVEN'T BEEN THE SAME: MAKING THE TRANSITION FROM MARRIAGE TO PARENTHOOD (William Morrow, 1992), which was named one of the Top Five Books for New Parents by Child Magazine. His books have been translated into numerous languages, including Spanish, Portuguese, Chinese, Japanese, German, and Danish.

Dr. Sachs regularly writes articles on family life for magazines such as Redbook, Parenting, Parents, Child, and American Baby, is renowned for his creative and innovative treatment of children and families, and has lectured and led seminars and workshops both nationally and internationally. He has been interviewed on over three hundred radio and television shows, including The Today Show, 20/20, The Montel Williams Show, The Sally Jesse Raphael Show, and The Diane Rehm Show.

His original poetry has been collected in IN THE DESPERATE KINGDOM OF LOVE: POEMS 2001-2004, (Chestnut Hills Press, 2005), BLIND DATE: POEMS OF EXPECTANT FATHERHOOD (Chestnut Hills Press), and the forthcoming WHY AM I TELLING YOU THIS? : POEMS FROM PSYCHOTHERAPY.

Dr. Sachs is also a composer and performer, most recently releasing HARD TALES TO TELL, a cycle of sixteen original songs based on the stories his patients have told him. Other recording projects include OPENING DAY: SONGS OF EXPECTANT FATHERHOOD, LOVE SO HARD: SONGS OF MARRIAGE, and the soundtrack for the NPR series on minor league baseball, APPALACHIAN ALMANAC.

He is a graduate of Brown University, where he met his wife, Dr. Karen Meckler, a psychiatrist and medical acupuncturist, and together they raise their three teenaged children and two dogs in Columbia, Maryland.

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