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When One Door Closes: A Teen's Inspiring Journey and Living Legacy

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As I type this, Frank Sinatra is singing (on his satellite radio "Channel 75") a song written specially for him, titled (What will it matter) "100 YEARS FROM TODAY."

Coincidentally (or maybe not!) I just happened to be reading the final words of this deeply affecting book --- about a Michigan girl, 17-year-old Alexandra Graham and her brave but unsuccessful battle with cancer.

All of us have had this same thought, haven't we? Will my life matter to people, loved ones or strangers, after I am gone? Contributing this book's brilliant final chapter, Michael Josephson offers us a resounding YES. With one little proviso! Consider his words (the best I ever read on this subject) and see if they speak to your heart too.

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"Ready or not, someday it will all come to an end. There will be no more sunrises, minutes, hours or days.

All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten will pass to someone else. Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance. It will not matter what you owned, or what you were owed.

Your judgments, resentments, frustrations and jealousies will finally disappear. So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to-do lists will expire. The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.

It won't matter where you came from or which side of the tracks you lived on at the end. It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant. Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured? What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built; not what you got, but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success but your significance . . . not what you learned but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence but your character. Not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.

Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident. It's not a matter of circumstance but of choice. Choose to live a life that matters.

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As if to underline these words, this book (subtitled, "A Teen's Inspiring Journey and Living Legacy") culminates with this moving recollection from a Michigan woman, Dorothy Pitsch, who knew nothing of Alexandra Graham's courageous losing battle, until days after "Alex" died. Mrs. Pitsch writes:

"My husband and I had five children and the two youngest were off to college. It was a time in my life when I was looking for something new and meaningful to do.

"I prayed to God, `Show me some work that will make a difference in the world.' That's when I got involved in a Christian outreach program called WHEELS FOR THE WORLD. They gather used wheelchairs, repairing them and redistributing them to those in need around the world. They didn't have anyone in Michigan doing it, so I volunteered to see what I can do."

"Well, I started a wheelchair drive collection program, and they started to come in from all over the state - hundreds and hundreds of them . . .

"Alex Graham's father Bill called and wanted us to come over and pick up Alex's wheelchair at his office. It was a memorable morning [because] I had arranged to pick up a truckload of wheelchairs that day, and had an interview scheduled with THE DETROIT NEWS. When we finished we headed over to Bill Graham's office . . .

"At this point I didn't know anything about Alex. I mean, we had picked up hundreds of wheelchairs and this was one more to add to the effort. Bill handed me a couple of sheets of paper and said, `I want you to read these when you find some time.'

"On the way back home, I read [those pages from Bill] written about Alex by the well-respected journalist Bob Talbert of the Detroit Free Press.

"When I read the article I remembered my daughter talking to me about a local girl with cancer who recently died. At the time I had no idea who she was talking about. Now I realized that it was Alex.

"When I tied it all together, I realized I had a very special wheelchair. I decided I wanted to track it [this wheelchair] to see who got it. [Alex's chair was] loaded into my car and I was driving down the road to my home when I heard this loud, clear voice. The voice urged: `Let's stop by and see my Dad. It will make him feel better.'

"I was alone in the car! Startled by what I'd heard, I sensed the hairs on my neck and arms stand on end. This was something I had never, ever experienced before.

"Then, when I should have made a right-hand turn to go home, I found myself in the left-turn lane. I was thinking, `What's going on here?'

"Before I knew it, I had turned left and was headed for Bill Graham's office. I had no clue what I was going to say when I got there . . .

"Bill came out of his office and I told him I was thinking of tracking Alex's chair . . . to see how it changed the recipient's life. Then I told him about what happened in my car . . . about a young girl's voice that told me to stop by and see him . . . that it would make him feel better.

"Bill started to cry, and threw his arms around me. I was speechless. [Soon] I got back into the car and could feel Alex's presence. I reached over and put my hand on the cushion from her chair. It was sitting on the seat next to me. `You're right, Alex,' I said. `This will make your Dad feel better'."

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And just beneath these words from "Mrs. Pitsch," is a 3,000 year old Biblical quotation. [Isaiah 30:21]

"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, `This is the way; walk in it'."

When One Door Closes illustrates that Alex's legacy continues with the lessons learned and good deeds that others have done in her honor. This book, which I was fortunate enough to read in pre-release, is a revealing look at not only Alex but of the people, be it family, friends, medical personnel or clergy, who were honored to know her, love her and learn from her. Each person interviewed became a stronger and more sensitive person because of Alex. There are great lessons in this book about friendship, love, respect and dignity. I only wish that this book never had to be written.

When One Door Closes - which I was lucky enough to read pre-publication - is the honest recollection of a young teenager's battle with cancer as told by her family, friends and medical staff. The book, however, is not a depressing tale, but rather an inspiring journey about how Alex never viewed herself as a victim. To this day, the lessons that Alex taught people about her vigor for life, her positive outlook and her ability to confront adversity head-on still affects those that contributed to the book - and you can hear it in their stories. You don't need to have experienced a tragedy of this sort to relate to this book...you just need to have lived life to be inspired by it.

Life is sometimes cruel. "When One Door Closes: A Teen's Inspiring Journey and Living Legacy" is Susie and Bill Graham's reflections on their daughter's battle with cancer. Alexandra Graham was diagnosed at the age of sixteen and never let her spirit falter. She knew it was out of her hands and prayed for a miracle, a miracle which unfortunately did not come, but Alex did what she could to leave the world better than she found it. "When One Door Closes" is a touching and inspiring story, highly recommended to any parent facing a similarly tragic situation.

I know Alex's Mom and Dad from the Make A Wish 300 mile bikeride, and Team Alex.

I am also a physician and parent. This book is a motivator, a reminder about how to live, and an inspiration to us all.

My life has changed already from reading it! Alex's wish goes on and keeps changing us.

Read this book if you get the chance!!

I happen to be acquainted with this family. This is a lovely tribute to their daughter Alex. Alex lives in all of her friends, family, and even those who did not know her, mostly due to the love and commitment of her parents who are making sure that her life and death continue to teach us all about grace and love.

I didn't want to put this book down. It is an easy read. Be prepared to cry. This book made me want to move next door to the Grahams.

"When One Door Closes" is a recipient of the prestigious Mom's Choice Award. The Mom's Choice Awards honors excellence in family-friendly media, products and services. An esteemed panel of judges includes education, media and other experts as well as parents, children, librarians, performing artists, producers, medical and business professionals, authors, scientists and others. A sampling of the panel members includes: Dr. Twila C. Liggett, Ten-time Emmy-winner, professor and founder of Reading Rainbow; Julie Aigner-Clark, Creator of Baby Einstein and The Safe Side Project; Jodee Blanco, New York Times Best-Selling Author; LeAnn Thieman, Motivational speaker and coauthor of seven Chicken Soup For The Soul books; Tara Paterson, Certified Parent Coach, and founder of the Mom's Choice Awards. Parents and educators look for the Mom s Choice Awards seal in selecting quality materials and products for children and families. This book/product has been honored by this distinguished award.