Customer Reviews

When the Past Is Present: Healing the Emotional Wounds that Sabotage our Relationships

5 star:		(9)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

"When the Past Is Present" is one of the best books I have ever read. In this beautifully written work Dr. Richo explains psychological terminology in a manner that is easy to understand. This aspect of the book refreshing, clear and illuminating. Yet it is also a very spiritual book that speaks to one's heart. The material provides a profound and useful way for us to examine relationships so that we can move away from and let go of the past. I believe that anyone who reads this book will be positively and deeply affected by it.

This book belongs on the shelf of any therapist/psychologist. David Richo suggests that all good relationships are based on the 5 A's: Attention, Acceptance, Appreciation, Affection, and Allowing your partner to be his/her self. The book is based on how earlier life problems are replayed through relationships, aka transference. Richo beautifully discusses how certain relationship issues can be formed and more importantly, how one can break free of old habits that destruct relationships. To top it off the writing is beautifully written.

As great as Richo's How to be an Adult. Richo's a poet. He gives unparalleled insight to why we act/react the way we do. If you are practicing mindfulness and a Twelve Step program, this book is for you. Both of Richo's books I've mentioned have increased my personal work and deepened my husband's and my relationship.

I've found this book to be enlightening. It has shown me how my past shows up in most all of my current relationships and reactions to events. And it makes the point that it is not all bad to have this happen. It can be an occasion to look at those reactions and heal them so that we are not being ruled by former events. I'm enjoying the book greatly.

I wish I had read this before my last relationship. My eyes are definitely open to a new way of looking at things. I see myself and others in the pages of this book. I began meditation just before I read this book and it was a great complement to my practice.

I have developed very strong affectionate feelings for my therapist (which had taken over 3 1/2 years), and didn't know how to handle them. (FYI, I am a male, she is female, both of us are in our mid-40's). Per her recommendation, she suggested I check out a book on transference from the local library, which was David Richo's book. He explained with great examples what transference is, and how we carry our past feelings into our present lives. He also gives great examples on how to deal with them, how to change our thought patterns and not let our feelings and emotions control our lives in a negative way. I liked the book so much, when I returned the library's copy, I bought my own. I recommend it for anyone who needs the same help and assistance I did. A great buy for the money!

In this book, David Richo gives very helpful and practical information about how we can turn the relationship challenges of everyday life into resources for personal and spiritual growth. His compassionate understanding of the struggles we have and his clear directions for working with them provide a warm welcome to taking on the demanding and rewarding task of making changes for our own good and others around us. This is a potent resource for self development and transformation.

I found this book to be very difficult to read, it was written very much in a clinical type of format, with clinical language instead of being in a format that is easy for the lay person to read and understand.

This book is one of the best I have read for learning and executing the path for healing pasts hurts or harms.
I can't recommend it enough.

This book is amazing. David Richo eloquently and succinctly takes the reader on a journey to psychological enlightenment. The author provides a clear and sensitive guide on how to free ourselves from our past, using the appropriate psychological terminology (which can sometimes be absent from other books on the subject).
It can be quite challenging to read - concentration is required, simply because he doesn't waste pages on following case studies, but gets straight to the core of the issue that he is discussing. Consequently, each page has revelations and insights to reflect upon. It is advisable to take it slowly so that the reader can gain the optimal benefits from each insight.
Having read a number of books on this subject, including some of the most popular, I can honestly advise those who are serious about gaining emotional freedom to go straight to this book.