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When She Makes More: 10 Rules for Breadwinning Women Hardcover – May 1, 2014

4.6 out of 5 stars 93 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

“In When She Makes More, Farnoosh Torabi unmasks the challenges female breadwinners face and provides solid solutions for protecting your finances and your relationship.”
—Tory Johnson, Good Morning America contributor and New York Times #1 bestselling author of The Shift
 
“When She Makes More is an inspiring, optimistic book that equips today's female breadwinners with smart solutions for overcoming the personal and professional trip wires of our new economic reality.”
—Barbara Corcoran, author of Shark Tales and host of The Millionaire Broker with Barbara Corcoran on CNBC
                     
“I predict Farnoosh’s ground breaking book will save more relationships than couples counseling ever could.  Superbly researched, well-written, engagingly fun, I couldn’t put it down.  Every working woman, married or single, needs to read this empowering guide! I’m so grateful I did.”
—Barbara Stanny, author of Secrets of Six-Figure Women
 
When She Makes More is a book of liberation from old ideas about women in the workforce who want to have it all. Torabi’s intelligence, respect for research, and vibrant prose put the book in an elite class with the best self-help books from financial gurus and masters of psychological nonfiction.”
—Amanda Steinberg, founder of DailyWorth.com

About the Author

Farnoosh Torabi is a personal finance expert, speaker and TV personality. Her work and advice has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Entrepreneur, Time and Money magazines. Her television credits include The Today Show, ABC, CNN, Live! With Kelly and Michael, Dr .Oz and The View. She hosted the Webby-nominated show Financially Fit on Yahoo!, the #1 personal finance series on the web. She and her husband live in Brooklyn. Learn more about Farnoosh at Farnoosh.TV.
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Avery (May 1, 2014)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1594632162
  • ISBN-13: 978-1594632167
  • Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1.2 x 9.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (93 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #581,733 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Hardcover
This book is full of dated stereotypes about men and women and obnoxious statements about the gender roles "in our DNA" that I'm not even going to refute because I assume you're smart enough to read a biology text. It also contradicts itself, saying in one place that couples should think of all money coming in as "our money," and in another place that the wife should pay the mortgage and the husband should pay the cable. Also, obvious things like you shouldn't require your husband to ask your permission to buy a Coke and a candy bar, because that's humiliating. NO ONE likes to have to ask permission from a spouse to buy little things. That's not a masculine or feminine thing, just part of being an adult human!

It also says to leave your baby in daycare for long hours so you can build up seniority to spend more time with him when he's older, since babies don't know the difference between you and the baby-sitter anyway. Dumb. Insulting.

Two stars instead of one because I do agree that it is important to iron out the money issues in any marriage--money can be a sticking point for anyone--and because it reminded me to be grateful that my husband and father are both grown-ups perfectly content to hang out the laundry and wash the dishes while their wives work, not toddlers who expect their needs to be catered to all day long.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Farnoosh's advice immediately struck a chord with me because I'm one of those men who earned less. My spouse and I have enjoyed nearly 28 years of marriage while figuring out our own roles-- and dealing with the scrutiny of family & friends. My spouse and I kept ourselves focused on the real goal of financial independence, and the book's practical money-management techniques really work.

Guys, don't worry: this is not a male-bashing polemic. There's no psychobabble. You'll learn how two genders will see the same situations in very different ways, and you'll know how to respond to those differences. The book is based on hundreds of interviews with couples and counselors, and they've figured out how to deal with the inevitable debates to keep it all together. Our emotions and reflex responses may try to hijack our brains, but you'll learn how to get back on track instead of reacting.

10 easy (and very entertaining) chapters will show you how to level up your communications skills and share your couple's responsibilities. It's not about who earns more, but rather how each of you contribute to the relationship. You'll also learn how to handle the critical commentary of your family (particularly mothers-in-law) and the rest of society.

It's a great read, and my spouse and I kept nodding our heads in recognition. Our daughter is getting her copy as a bonus college graduation gift.
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Format: MP3 CD Verified Purchase
I don't even know where to start with this. I don't leave bad reviews, but this was the worst. I guess I'm not the target audience, because I'm a happily married female professional working in a male dominated field, and my husband is extremely helpful/understanding, even though I make more (gasp). My summary for the entire book is pretty much this: unsubstantiated DNA claims, rude spouses who clearly have given up (does the gender really matter, wouldn't men be pissed if they had lazy wives??), advice such as "let your man be chivalrous to feel like a man!", and plenty other ridiculous claims. What's worse is that these claims have limited factual basis. Sure, there are plenty of statistics, upwards of 15 on some pages (that I've definitely forgotten. I would love to know what Malcolm Gladwell would say about all of the causal factor statistic assumptions). My running theory while reading this is that all of the different studies and numbers she uses are to distract when chapters are validated by "someone I interviewed named Melanie", which is a recurring occurrence. There are several opinions and theories that are presented as fact, it's almost alarming. I really challenge anyone who has read/will read this book to question how much our female brains are hard wired to rely on men (which is presented as "politically incorrect, but just fact"). Several things here: first, if we relied on men for hunting, then why would women have wasted their time gathering. Second, it was men and elderly who were primarily child care givers while the women were gathering. Hunts were not everyday affairs, and the men had plenty of leisure time. Additionally, there is so much marriage advice that's completely unrelated to finances. I just really didn't need to read about one counselers suggestion to have a decade long marriage contract to foster open communication. Save yourself time, don't read this book. Get 'Overwhelmed: work love and play when no one has the time" for some real advice..
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
If you're looking to find a book where the woman earns more than the man and their lifestyle choices match your choices exactly, this book isn't it. In fact, there likely isn't any such book in existence. In my 12 year marriage, alone, we have switched roles of "breadwinner" many times, so there are no "traditional" roles. There are also going to be varying views of child-rearing, wage-earning, and family balance that are purely individual choices. This book reflects one writers experiences, but it doesn't mean you have to model your life after her; her guidance, however, can be applied in some universal ways.

What I did like about this book was a) the research and studies. Seeing where marriage has been over the years and what society deems acceptable puts the conversation in perspective and helps to do away with prejudices one may have. b) the tone. While other readers find her straight-forward story-telling a put-off, I have spoken with her in person, and the voice just seems to echo her personality. (Which there is nothing wrong with.)

More of a relationship book than a finance book, I love the conversation that this title has opened up. No longer taboo to discuss the struggles of the female breadwinner, or the issues that can arise in the marriage as a result, this read comes from a good place. It also clearly communicates that the guy can have a hard time with this, even if he is completely egalitarian in his views. Each individual's gifts, experiences, and personalities are going to determine how they deal with the woman making more, and this book recognizes that.

Hard fast rules for your marriage? This book won't offer it. Another voice in the worthy discussion of changing workforce and how the household responds? Yes, for sure.
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