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When to Speak Up and When To Shut Up [Kindle Edition]

Dr. Michael D. Sedler
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (62 customer reviews)

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Book Description

Almost everyone has found themselves in a situation where they don't know if they should bite their tongue or speak their mind. When is silence golden and when is it better to speak up?

When to Speak Up and When to Shut Up offers practical guidelines for people who want to improve their communication skills. It will help readers explore the cost and purpose of silence, how to ask good questions, how to overcome pressure to remain silent, and more. Using biblical and contemporary examples, this book shares important strategies for discerning God's direction, acting on his word, and building better communication within your workplace, church, and home.

Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

When is silence golden?
When is it more important to speak from your heart?

Your friend is about to make a disastrous decision. You see problems in your son or daughter's marriage. At work you see a better approach than the one your supervisor suggests. Should you speak up? Or should you keep the peace by staying quiet?

When to Speak Up and When to Shut Up offers practical guidelines for conversations you won't regret. It will help you explore

-the cost and purpose of silence
-why to check motives when talking to friends, family and authorities
-how to ask good questions
-ways to deal with anger and resentment
-how to overcome pressure to remain silent

Using biblical and contemporary examples, this book shares important strategies for building better communication within your workplace, church and home.

"If you've ever wondered when you should bite your tongue and when you should speak your mind, this book is for you. I have personally benefited from Dr. Sedler's advice and know that you will, too. Read this wise book and skillfully navigate your important conversations."--Dr. Les Parrott III

About the Author

Updated Bio - April 2006

Michael Sedler (D.Min., Christian Life School of Theology) ministers in churches and provides consultation services to schools and businesses throughout the United States. Michael is the author of Stop the Runaway Conversation and When to Speak Up When to Shut Up and works as an adjunct professor for three universities. He and his wife, Joyce, live in Spokane, Washington.

Product Details

  • File Size: 1104 KB
  • Print Length: 160 pages
  • Publisher: Revell (August 1, 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B001GCUBW8
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #393,588 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
21 of 22 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Timely Advice August 6, 2007
Format:Mass Market Paperback
This book has an appropriate amount of scripture to back up the logic within the pages. I and several of my co-workers used it when we had a call meeting with our boss. It really does give practical advice about when to speak up and when to hold your piece. I would suggest it for anyone who attends meeetings, supervises others, and who counsels or serves as a mentor to others. In addition, parents may see great benefits from using it.
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14 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for everyone. September 5, 2010
Format:Mass Market Paperback|Verified Purchase
People, if you never have read any kind of book, I suggest you read this one. My female companion found this particular book at an Amish store in the small town of Sugar Creek, Ohio. I borrowed a copy of this book from my local library. Read the book in one night and then purchased a copy.
I am 68 years old and mature, but this Bible based book teaches you more about handling difficult situations, then living them in everyday life.
PLease read this book. It's a real eye and mind opener.
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21 of 23 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A great tool November 23, 2008
Format:Mass Market Paperback
What a great tool! This book surprised me. I did not find it in my local Christian bookstore, or at the many local bookstores, I frequent. I found it at the Phoenix Airport during an unexpected 3-hour layover. The title spoke to me as you can imagine during my irritated state. Just as I was ready to release one of the biggest sighs I could muster after hearing about another 1-hour delay, the cover of the book caught my eye--"When to Speak Up and WHEN TO SHUT UP". God sure has a great sense of humor. This book was exactly what I needed not just for that moment, but in everyday life.

It speaks to everyday opportunities to look at the "why" behind our communications and to test ourselves--honestly--about why we are communicating and the effects of our communications--on others and ourselves. It also looks at when we need to speak up either as a defense for or protection of others. I felt somewhat convicted as I poured through the book.

It utilizes scriptures and biblical stories to illustrate and drive home the learning. I just loved it! I was unfamiliar with the author and checked Amazon for other titles. I will be purchasing more of his books on this subject.

If you are searching for a book that hits on and pushes you beyond your comfort zone in both these areas, well here it is. At the end of the book, you will realize that sometimes, "Silence is not golden".


Another recommendation in this area for Christians: 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue: What You Say (and Don't Say) Will Improve Your Relationships
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Read If You Have a Mouth October 21, 2012
Format:Mass Market Paperback
Would it be too forward of me to say, every Christian should read this book? Well let me take it one further, then. I think everybody should read this book if they have a mouth and intend to use it. Dr. Michael Sedler has clearly and sensitively articulated guidelines, steps and practical solutions for using that tiny little member of the body called the tongue in a manner which fosters growth, understanding and clarity. The title of the book absolutely grabbed me, but then it also delivered. The principles that are shared in this book are simple, concise and powerful. The examples he gives are authentic and he goes on to share not only wisdom but a few personal hard earned and learned lessons.

The opening dedication of the book includes this statement: "I pray this book will encourage each reader to be a to be a voice in the wilderness of life: a voice of reason, of passion, of encouragement of leadership, but most of all, of love and grace." I believe Dr. Sedler does a good job of communicating, coaching and exhorting how to make this happen in real life.

Some of the topics covered (listed on back of book):

* the cost and purpose of silence
* why to check motives when talking to friends, family and authorities
* how to ask good questions
* ways to deal with anger and resentment
* how to overcome pressure to remain silent

Drawing directly from specific instances in Scripture and the lives of well known Bible figures, he extracts useful directives which we can concretely put into action in our own lives. I loved the examples of communication effectively or ineffectively explored with reference to David, Abraham, Nicodemus, and Jesus.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars EXCELLENT BOOK!! December 20, 2012
By Kimfurd
Format:Mass Market Paperback
"Communication breakdowns discourage people for sharing their thought and ideas, and create opportunities for offense, bitterness and misunderstanding." (p.54)

Dr. Michael D. Sedler's When to Speak up & When to Shut Up should be required reading for couples anticipating their wedding day. It should be a gift to those married for years and contemplating divorce because, "They just can't communicate and don't have anything in common." In short, this is a treasure trove of Scripture and sound advice that will absolutely change the way you communicate with family, friends and co-workers. And you know what? It's not that difficult. What is difficult is taking the time to examine our hearts and motives before we open our big mouths.

I have worn out a highlighter reading this book, and plan to go back through with a pen and make personal notes that apply to my own life and my own faulty communication efforts. This is a MUST HAVE for any library and would make an excellent workbook for marriage counselors, a good workbook for a Sunday School Class to work through, and should be required reading for the couple considering marriage. This is an EXCELLENT resource!! One I HIGHLY recommend!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
4.0 out of 5 stars Fine Read
Not a lot of new ideas but the authors style of writing is very well constructed. You might not lean anything new from this book, but you will certainly be encouraged.
Published 1 month ago by Steven Venable
1.0 out of 5 stars Not a self help book
It's about God helping guide your decisions to speak up or not.
God helps those who help themselves, which is what I was trying to do when I bought the book. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Wendy Malley
5.0 out of 5 stars Clear and concise.
When To Speak Up & When To Shut Up is a concise, well written treatise on the art of effective communication. Read more
Published 2 months ago by JBC
2.0 out of 5 stars May not be what you think - read description
To me, this is a journal of anecdotes, not facts, using religion as credibility. If that works for you, go for it. Read more
Published 3 months ago by James Whinfield
4.0 out of 5 stars A helpful read!
Author Dr. Michael Sedler reminds us that when we are communicating with others there is a time to speak there is a time to listen. Read more
Published 4 months ago by DND
1.0 out of 5 stars Gods view interpreted by Dr. Sedler
This is not the result of years of research but instead the opinions of Dr. Sedler as referenced to his Christian belief system. Read more
Published 5 months ago by John L. Seger
5.0 out of 5 stars Catchy title
I've just started reading this and it is making me rethink why not being willing to "hurt someone's feelings" by being honest is actually hurting more than their feelings. Read more
Published 6 months ago by Cathie Soden
5.0 out of 5 stars Knowing when to speak up or keep your mouth shut
This is an excellent book for adults; for youth groups; for teens.
I gave this book to my son--he plans on reading it with his soon to be teen-age son. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Shar Tom
4.0 out of 5 stars Never
wound up reading it. I got it for free, let it take up space, and eventually deleted it. Oh well
Published 8 months ago by Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent read
I'm usually not a self help kind of girl yet on a long layoff at the airport started to rummage through this book. This book is very insightful full of real life experiences. Read more
Published 9 months ago by AndiPandi
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