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When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times (Shambhala Classics) [Paperback]

Pema Chodron
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (253 customer reviews)

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Book Description

September 26, 2000 Shambhala Classics
The beautiful practicality of her teaching has made Pema Chödrön one of the most beloved of contemporary American spiritual authors among Buddhists and non-Buddhists alike. A collection of talks she gave between 1987 and 1994, the book is a treasury of wisdom for going on living when we are overcome by pain and difficulties. Chödrön discusses:



   •  Using painful emotions to cultivate wisdom, compassion, and courage
   •  Communicating so as to encourage others to open up rather than shut down
   •  Practices for reversing habitual patterns
   •  Methods for working with chaotic situations
   •  Ways for creating effective social action

Frequently Bought Together

When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times (Shambhala Classics) + The Places that Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times (Shambhala Classics) + Taking the Leap: Freeing Ourselves from Old Habits and Fears
Price for all three: $32.44

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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Much like Zen, Pema Chodron's interpretation of Tibetan Buddhism takes the form of a nontheistic spiritualism. In When Things Fall Apart this head of a Tibetan monastery in Canada outlines some relevant and deceptively profound terms of Tibetan Buddhism that are germane to modern issues. The key to all of these terms is accepting that in the final analysis, life is groundless. By letting go, we free ourselves to face fear and obstacles and offer ourselves unflinchingly to others. The graceful, conversational tone of Chodron's writing gives the impression of sitting on a pillow across from her, listening to her everyday examples of Buddhist wisdom. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

Pema Chodron, a student of Chogyam Trunpa Rinpoche and Abbot of Gampo Abbey, has written the Tibetan Buddhist equivalent of Harold Kushner's famous book, When Bad Things Happen to Good People. As the author indicates in the postscript to her book: "We live in difficult times. One senses a possibility they may get worse." Consequently, Chodron's book is filled with useful advice about how Buddhism helps readers to cope with the grim realities of modern life, including fear, despair, rage and the feeling that we are not in control of our lives. Through reflections on the central Buddhist teaching of right mindfulness, Chodron orients readers and gives them language with which to shape their thinking about the ordinary and extraordinary traumas of modern life. But most importantly, Chodron demonstrates how effective the Buddhist point of view can be in bringing order into disordered lives.
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 148 pages
  • Publisher: Shambhala (September 26, 2000)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1570623449
  • ISBN-13: 978-1570623448
  • Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6.2 x 0.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (253 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #4,241 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Pema Chödrön is an American Buddhist nun in the lineage of Chögyam Trungpa. She is resident teacher at Gampo Abbey in Nova Scotia, the first Tibetan monastery in North America established for Westerners. She is also the author of many books and audiobooks, including the best-selling When Things Fall Apart and Don't Bite the Hook.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
303 of 310 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A book to read and reread, always new October 7, 2002
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
I was just finishing this book in September 2001 when the events of 9-11 turned the world upside down, and things truly fell apart. There suddenly were all the vulnerable feelings that Pema Chödrön encourages us to embrace: fear, sorrow, loneliness, groundlessness. And in the days of shock and grief that followed, there was that brief and abundant display of "maitri," or loving kindness, which emerged in waves of generosity and compassion for one another. For a while, we were in the world that she points to as an alternative to the everyday routine of getting, spending, and constant activity.

It is nearly impossible to summarize or characterize this fine book. In some 150 pages it covers more than a person could hope to absorb in many years, if not a lifetime. We may know the Buddha's famous insight that human pain and suffering result from desire and aversion. But few writers have been able to articulate as well as Chödrön the implications of that insight in ways that make sense to the Western mind. As just one example from this book, her discussion of the "six kinds of loneliness" (chap. 9) illustrates how our desires to achieve intimacy with others are an attempt to run away from a deep encounter with ourselves. Our continuing efforts to establish security for ourselves are a denial of fundamental truths, which prevents our deep experience of the joy of living. Our reluctance to love ourselves and others closes down our hearts.

Chödrön invites us to be fascinated, as she is, by paradox. On hopelessness and death (chap. 7) she writes: "If we're willing to give up hope that insecurity and pain can be exterminated, then we can have the courage to relax with the groundlessness of our situation. This is the first step on the path." She gets us to acknowledge our restlessness (even our spiritual restlessness) for what it is, something we do instead of simply paying attention to ourselves in the moment and to what happens next, without judgment or preconceptions.

In addition to this book, I recommend acquiring one or more of her audio tapes and hearing her voice as she speaks before audiences. For all the high-mindedness that may come across in descriptions like the one above, or what you might take away by reading the cover of her book, Chödrön is down to earth and unpretentious, speaking in her American accent (don't let the appearance of her name fool you) and with a self-effacing sense of humor. Her message is in her manner, as much as it is in what she says.

This is a book to buy and read, and reread at intervals, for it is always new, always speaking to you exactly where you are, right now.

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162 of 169 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Not for the faint of heart! December 30, 2002
Format:Paperback
This book has resided on the shelf next to my bed for many years and has been read often. Reading through a few reviews at this site it is clear many people are willing to listen to Pema Chodron's uncompromising words about the challenges of being human. For those people seeking a few comforting bromides, who expected a self-help book, this material must surely be unwelcome. But it is far from trite and certainly not depressing. Tibetan Buddhists practice in the charnal grounds not because they're depressives, but because life ends in death for all of us. And charnal grounds in Tibet were places where hacked up bodies were fed to circling vultures...no quickly slipping a deceased body into a casket to avoid confronting the withered body or the odors associated with illness and death for these Buddhists.

When I attended a Pema Chodron lecture some years ago she announced that her favorite manta is "Om, grow up!" It takes great courage to meet life on life's terms and accept responsiblity for our actions. And since life invariably brings challenges associated with disappointment and loss, the work continues to the moment of death. In our addicted society, that is a message all too readily rejected. Pema is not for the faint of heart! But if you intend to claim your aliveness, to risk intimacy, to share joy, her words are worth attending to. Namaste.

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101 of 105 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Reading October 21, 1999
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
Ane Pema Chodron writes in a clear and simple manner. I read this book about twice a year, because I learn something new or revisit concepts that I might have overlooked previously. It is clearly not just reading for when you go through tough times - its applicable to daily life. Pema's style is simple, clear and very human. We can all understand and relate to the teachings. It also provides us with an understanding of what we are going through and clear methods to deal with our situations and life.

For people who meditate - it is excellent reading. It gets you to understand what you go through when life is difficult, and how it is of great benefit along your path. It is like drinking a long cool glass of clear water on a warm day - clear and refreshing.

Its a great book to give as a gift. This book is a wonderful gift given to us by Pema Chodron.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Gratitude
Felt very stagnant and confused lately. Chodron clearly identifies with modern day problems,and offers life altering practices that most importantly, teach one to be gentle with... Read more
Published 1 day ago by Olivia
5.0 out of 5 stars Very Helpful!
Many of us find ourselves with problems that seem overwhelming. This book helps the reader to remember that sometimes things fall apart and that's okay. Read more
Published 3 days ago by Colleen Crawford
5.0 out of 5 stars I 5* This Book & Pema Chodron Too !!
I am still absorbing as best I can the wisdom and practices in this volume ... what I love is that it is not obsure and just uses American vernacular to address Bhuddist concepts.
Published 10 days ago by Helen V Kyle
4.0 out of 5 stars Fundamental wonderfulness
I love Pema Chodron. She has so much to teach us. Just reading some of her words makes me feel as if I have a more spacious head. It is also true that she can be a bit repetitive. Read more
Published 12 days ago by victoria behrman
5.0 out of 5 stars The main guide to living
I have read this book over and over when I need advice and when I don't. It simply solves whatever is troubling me at the time. Read more
Published 13 days ago by Kathleen Craig
5.0 out of 5 stars perfect
Pema Chodron does an amazing job taking the essential principles of Buddhism and applying them where most needed in a generally misguided Western experience in a way that is... Read more
Published 14 days ago by Daniel M. Howley
5.0 out of 5 stars If you are going to a rough time-buy this book
For anyone suffering a loss or a difficult time this book is wonderful. It speaks to your heart as it aches to be saved by your sadness and grief. Read more
Published 16 days ago by Betty Prat
5.0 out of 5 stars From start to finish
From start to finish this book was inspiring. I learns some new things and had some things I already knew reinforced.
Published 25 days ago by joan lorenz
5.0 out of 5 stars Pema Chodron's wisdom, a saving grace
This book saved my life once; it's a precious treasure that I would recommend to anyone at a difficult intersection in their life.
Published 25 days ago by Elizabeth Orr
5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful !
A book that is a "Must Have." In times like these, most of us have things falling apart all around us. This book will show you how to accept everything as they come. MO
Published 29 days ago by MO
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