Customer Reviews

Where the Ashes Are: The Odyssey of a Vietnamese Family

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The author, having grown up in an uppler-class family with aristocratic scholarly roots in the central region, thus gives another perspecitve to the Vietnam experience. His father, Nguyen Vän -Dãi (pen name Hoàng Liên), was a high-ranking civil servant who oversaw the central region from his office in Danang. During the Tet Offensive of 1968 in Hue, where the family had come to visit the author's grandparents, the father was taken away by the communists. Transferred from one prison camp to another for twelve years, he was finally released and reunited with his wife who had stayed behind in Vietnam to care for their mentally-ill daughter, who eventually died. The author, who had left VN in 75 at seventeen, was reunited with his parents in 1984. In 1989, the author returned to Vietnam on a radio assignment, and only in the last chapter before the epilogue does he tell of his visit. The book is more about the story of his family from 1968 onward than a personal memoir. The writing is direct, not sentimental, rough at times, but always expressive of compassion for Vietnam and its people. His love for the land of his birth allows him to be objective against the opposing political viewpoints that are expressed ironically all in the name of "loving the country." Though he is grateful to be live in the land of opportunity, he maintains a wariness of the excessiveness, cold routine, and "green-lawn" conformity of American society. In the epilogue he writes: "I know that my notions of my homeland are romanticized. But I am also aware of the difficulties I would face if I were to return to live and work in Vietnam. And yet, how could I not yearn for the open and gracious ways of the Vietnamese, from city folks to villagers, who smile and share with me everything from food to time and wisdom? How could I not be drawn to a people whose foremost quality is their ability to sustain unceasing hardship and loss, all the while retaining hope and faith and dignity? How could I not be drawn to a people whose dark-humored cynicism can also easily blossom into radiant innocent? How could I not be drawn to a people who can easily laugh in the midst of their own misery? I miss it all so deeply, and I want it all back, yet I know that going home and staying there is nearly impossible." He closes with, "Perhaps I will come to accept life in America. In the end, it is imperfect, and it will always remain so, for to me it is not home. But it will be the place where my parents have found a home, and the place where my parents were given back to me. As for Vietnam--perhaps I should be content that it may one day be the home of my children. It may be they who, in the future, will welcome me back there. And they will know, they will know, to bring my ashes home." This last wish of his is probably futile, but I can share in his feelings about his predicament: always longing for Vietnam yet knowing one can never live there but always feeling that the US is not one's true home. One exists in a floating exile-like state, not self-imposed or politically-imposed, but imposed by the circumstance.

I enjoyed reading this book. The book provided insight to better understand the Vietnamese culture, and history. This was one of several books I read before traveling through Vietnam. It made my trip even more meaningful.

I bought this for my husband, who served in Vietnam, after a recent trip there. He said it is fascinating reading for anyone who has visited or plans to.

I listened to Nguyen Qui Duc's long running radio show "Pacific Time" for its 7 year run and was heart broken during its close. Researching more about the host of this show, I realized he wrote a series of poems, stories, and hosted several literary events. I immediately scoured the web to find a copy of this book and managed to get an autographed one through Amazon.

Having grown up in America with a very traditional family while living in a Westernized environment, I often felt the tug between the two worlds. Although I do retain a lot of the traditional side of things, it was always difficult for me to relate to the old stories that my parents always told.

Although I still have very different views from my parents and grandparents, Duc's ability to articulate much of what I have felt my whole life but never yet able to express and has made my journey to find myself easier.