Who Moved My Soap? and over one million other books are available for Amazon Kindle. Learn more

Buy New

or
Sign in to turn on 1-Click ordering.
or
Amazon Prime Free Trial required. Sign up when you check out. Learn More
Buy Used
Used - Good See details
$2.70 & eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details

or
Sign in to turn on 1-Click ordering.
 
   
Kindle Edition
 
   
More Buying Choices
Have one to sell? Sell yours here
Who Moved My Soap?: The CEO's Guide to Surviving Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition
 
 
Start reading Who Moved My Soap? on your Kindle in under a minute.

Don't have a Kindle? Get your Kindle here, or download a FREE Kindle Reading App.

Who Moved My Soap?: The CEO's Guide to Surviving Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition [Paperback]

Andy Borowitz (Author)
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)

Price: $9.95 & eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details
  Special Offers Available
o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o
In Stock.
Ships from and sold by Amazon.com. Gift-wrap available.
Want it delivered Monday, January 30? Choose One-Day Shipping at checkout. Details

Formats

Amazon Price New from Used from
Kindle Edition --  
School & Library Binding $22.05  
Paperback $9.95  

Book Description

May 27, 2003
They threw the book at Madoff. Now here's the book he needs.

While many books are offered for the CEO who aims to survive the cutthroat competition of the corporate jungle, not a single one offers to help those same CEOs when the law catches up with them. That is, until now.

This book offers valuable advice for those executives who have cooked the books, and now find themselves paying the price. Borowitz covers all aspects of prison life, from exit strategies (prison-break tips) to ways of keeping the business acumen sharp (how to make the Warden your most valuable employee) to prison cell feng shui and even self-defense (how to use this book as a deadly weapon). Convicted corporate executives should look at this time spent in prison as an opportunity, rather than a disadvantage. New business contacts can be established, new management strategies tested-time can even be spent working on the golf game so it says sharp for ten, twenty, however many years. Direct from Bernie Madoff's cellmate, Who Moved My Soap? The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison is loaded with helpful tips, including:

  • Complete Corporate-Speak/Prison Slang Glossary
  • How to earn $$$ making vanity license plates
  • Trophy wives, and how to avoid becoming one
  • How to avoid getting back-stabbed literally
  • Don't forget, Who Moved My Soap? will be both small enough to fit in the pocket of your prison uniform, but also thick enough to hollow out and hide cigarettes in!

    Who Moved My Soap? is a must read for any white collar criminal. CEOs headed to the Big House will now have something to read to help them pass the time. It's also a must read for those of us who were fleeced by them.


    Special Offers and Product Promotions

    • This item is eligible for our 4-for-3 promotion. Eligible products include select Books and Home & Garden items. Buy any 4 eligible items and get the lowest-priced item free. Here's how (restrictions apply)

    Frequently Bought Together

    Who Moved My Soap?: The CEO's Guide to Surviving Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition + The Borowitz Report: The Big Book of Shockers + The Republican Playbook
    Price For All Three: $26.72

    Show availability and shipping details

    Buy the selected items together
    • In Stock.
      Ships from and sold by Amazon.com.
      Eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details

    • The Borowitz Report: The Big Book of Shockers $9.99

      In Stock.
      Ships from and sold by Amazon.com.
      Eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details

    • The Republican Playbook $6.78

      In Stock.
      Ships from and sold by Amazon.com.
      Eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details



    Editorial Reviews

    From Publishers Weekly

    New Yorker and NPR humorist Borowitz, author of the stock-market populism spoof The Trillionaire Next Door, sends up both corporate criminals and business literature in this rather funny book. With tongue firmly in cheek, Borowitz distills platitudes from countless business and leadership manuals and applies them to the context of the maximum security penitentiary. All the cliches are there: the leadership slogans (incarcerated CEO's should "be proactive" by starting riots instead of waiting to be made the cellblock bitch); the relentless positive thinking ("you'll emerge from your time in the joint more productive, more innovative, and millions of dollars wealthier than you were on the day the prison guard first checked you for lice"); the self-improvement schemas ("the Seven Habits of Highly Effective Prisoners"); the spurious soulfulness ("if being in prison is no longer about having fun, then what's the point?"); and the game theory buzz-concepts ("Win/Win" strategies usually lose out in prison to "Win/Die" strategies). Borowitz gives a pitch-perfect rendition of the vacuities of some business books, but given a genre in which Leadership Secrets of Attila the Hun was a bestseller, his smart little book hardly seems like a parody.
    Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

    About the Author

    Andy Borowitz is a comedian and satirist whose work appears in The New Yorker and at his award-winning website, BorowitzReport.com. He was the first-ever winner of the National Press Club’s award for humor.

    Product Details

    • Paperback: 96 pages
    • Publisher: Simon & Schuster; Original edition (May 27, 2003)
    • Language: English
    • ISBN-10: 0743251423
    • ISBN-13: 978-0743251426
    • Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.3 x 0.3 inches
    • Shipping Weight: 3.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
    • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (37 customer reviews)
    • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #648,255 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

    More About the Author

    Andy Borowitz is a writer and a comedian whose work appears in The New Yorker and at his satirical website, BorowitzReport.com, which has millions of readers around the world. The author of six books, he is the first-ever winner of the National Press Club's humor award, a two-time finalist for the Thurber Prize for American Humor, and a two-time host of the National Book Awards. He has been called a "Swiftian satirist" (The Wall Street Journal), "America's satire king" (The Daily Beast) and "one of the funniest people in America" (CBS News Sunday Morning).

     

    Customer Reviews

    37 Reviews
    5 star:
     (22)
    4 star:
     (6)
    3 star:
     (3)
    2 star:
     (3)
    1 star:
     (3)
     
     
     
     
     
    Average Customer Review
    4.1 out of 5 stars (37 customer reviews)
     
     
     
     
    Share your thoughts with other customers:
    Most Helpful Customer Reviews

    23 of 24 people found the following review helpful:
    5.0 out of 5 stars Perfect Beach Read, June 29, 2003
    By A Customer
    This review is from: Who Moved My Soap?: The CEO's Guide to Surviving Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition (Paperback)
    I first encountered Andy Borowitz's wicked satirical wit on NPR, and then more recently have been enjoying his brilliant one-liners on CNN. Then I got hooked on his Borowitz Report column after reading a glowing front page story about him in The Wall Street Journal. If you've never read Borowitz, Who Moved My Soap? is the perfect place to start. It's a hysterically funny take on the recent spate of corporate scandals, but it's more than that: it contains Borowitz's totally original, totally side-splitting riffs on pop culture, celebrities, politics, and even the Zagat guide and feng shui. The chapters are punchy and short, so it's the ideal funny book to read in little bits during a day at the beach. And it stays with you -- I read it days ago and I'm still quoting jokes to friends.

    One warning, though. While Who Moved My Soap? is the perfect beach read, if you read it on the beach you're bound to get strange looks from those around you as you find yourself laughing uncontrollably. That's what happened to me on the beach in Rhode Island, and people kept coming over to ask me what was so funny. The next day, I spotted four more people reading Who Moved My Soap? Mark my words, it's the book of the summer.

    Help other customers find the most helpful reviews 
    Was this review helpful to you? Yes No


    15 of 15 people found the following review helpful:
    4.0 out of 5 stars Someone Give a Copy to Martha!, January 29, 2004
    By 
    This review is from: Who Moved My Soap?: The CEO's Guide to Surviving Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition (Paperback)
    This book is just hilarious! Borowitz hits the nail on the head with some of his "tips" for CEOs headed for prison. The funniest chapter was The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Prisoners. It just kept me rolling. If you're tired of CEOs' antics, pick this book up, it's totally worth it.
    Help other customers find the most helpful reviews 
    Was this review helpful to you? Yes No


    14 of 14 people found the following review helpful:
    5.0 out of 5 stars SLICK, HILAROUS CORPORATE SATIRE, April 2, 2004
    This review is from: Who Moved My Soap?: The CEO's Guide to Surviving Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition (Paperback)
    Modern corporate world is a sty reeking of corporate scandals. This, despite a whole deluge of corporate "gurus" and biz books dispensing truckloads of advice on how to better run your company, manage your time, manage your employees, etc etc.

    Trust Andy Borowitz to rip the vacuity of almost 90% of such advisory tripe to shreds. He hammers home the drudgery of business cliches in an absolutely hilariously anti-establishment satire. It's an easy to read compilation, you could devour it in a couple of hours if you wish (and you mostly likely will).

    The title itself is a funny play on "Who moved my cheese", a monumentally boring bestseller from a few years ago about change management. As one of the reviews suggests, change is something a lot of disillusioned CEOs like Martha Stewart have to cope with in their newfound abodes.

    Pick up this gem for some pure, unadulterated, and occasionally even laught-out-loud humor. Pronto purchase material!

    Help other customers find the most helpful reviews 
    Was this review helpful to you? Yes No

    Share your thoughts with other customers: Create your own review
     
     
     
    Most Recent Customer Reviews











    Only search this product's reviews



    Inside This Book (learn more)
    First Sentence:
    If you're a convicted CEO who's heading to prison for the first time, let me just say this: You should be totally stoked. Read the first page
    Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
    prison cafeteria, prison slang, nicotine gum
    Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
    Six Sigma, Black Belts, New York, United States, Department of Justice, Sharpen the Saw, Terre Haute, Wall Street
    New!
    Concordance | Text Stats
    Browse Sample Pages:
    Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
    Search Inside This Book:

    Citations (learn more)
    This book cites 1 book:

    What Other Items Do Customers Buy After Viewing This Item?


    Tags Customers Associate with This Product

     (What's this?)
    Click on a tag to find related items, discussions, and people.
     

    Your tags: Add your first tag
     

    Customer Discussions

    This product's forum
    Discussion Replies Latest Post
    No discussions yet

    Ask questions, Share opinions, Gain insight
    Start a new discussion
    Topic:
    First post:
    Prompts for sign-in
     


    Active discussions in related forums
    Search Customer Discussions
    Search all Amazon discussions
       
    Related forums



    So You'd Like to...



    Look for Similar Items by Category


    Look for Similar Items by Subject