Customer Reviews

Why I Committed Suicide

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Sam Paul's breakout memoir is a love story told in three parts-the early romance and dating, the all-consuming passion, and then the decent into drugs and jail time. The book opens with Sam falling in love with Jenifer Jane Lansing. Both are college kids living in crappy Texas apartments, working part time jobs, and using marijuana (but nothing harder). Sam manages to prove that the spirit of the 60's is still alive, with his by-the-seat-of-his-pants existence, the environment of drug-sharing and happiness, and his pure love for Jenifer. He saves some money, hitches a ride, and attends a series of Greatful Dead shows in Northern CA and Oregon, scoring hydroponic weed and an entire sheet of acid to more fully experience the music. His relationship with Jenifer blossoms, and the two move in together. They take a series of vacations to Mexico and to go camping, exploring the country and loving one another. It's heartening to see people enjoying themselves and America in this manner.

Sam repeatedly discovers that hard drugs aren't as great as every anti-drug commercial told him they would be. He's happy with the weed and some occasional harder stuff, but it seems like everyone around him is becoming a coke addict. After watching Jenifer have a coke-induced seizure, it makes Sam sick to even be around it. But then the pair descend on slippery slope of heroin addiction, leading to the final third of the novel, in which Sam must confront his demons. He experiences with cops, the legal system, and the jail system are enlightening and shocking to anyone who hasn't experienced that world.

The memoir is told in the style of a personal journal. There are no chapters, just entries broken up into the three major sections of Sam's tale. Sam wrote in his book that he dislikes the term "page-turner," but unfortunately, that is exactly what this book is! It isn't a small book, but I found myself captivated by Sam's adventures and meditations on his own life, and I kept wanting to pick it back up to learn more. He's at work on a second book, and I can't wait for more from this new author.

I'm not exactly sure how to define where Why I Committed Suicide fits into a conventional book niche but I guess what's most important is that it's a lot of fun to read.
This novel from Sam Paul took me on an intense thrill ride of situations and experiences that most of I could hardly believe. Written in the semi-format of a personal journal but deeply layered with prose.
It starts out innocently introducing us to Sam's life and his awkwardness, beauty and confusion of his intense young love of Jenifer. We grow with him, watching his day to day activities define his life. I deeply felt his aches and pain, joys and even his annoyances. Even at his worst I found myself rooting for him and oddly sympathetic to his plights.
If it seems the middle of the book wanders for a bit it's only to set up the intense and wild conclusion. I was hungry to know the whole story and once I finished I really appreciated re-reading some of the extra details so crucial in the pacing and character development.
Once you begin the conclusion you won't want to put this book down!!
The language is young and coarse, the drug use is hard and lamentable but the story is RIVETING. ~5 stars overall, buy it and share it with someone because you won't ever find this in Wal-Mart. Why I Committed Suicide is one of the best examples of fresh young writing I've read in a long time.

I was told to read this book if I enjoyed "Perks of Being a Wallflower" and so I checked it out.

Overall, I thought it was a great book. It really lays everything out on the table for you, so there isn't anything that you miss or can't understand. You really get to see what life is like for Sam and what the drug world is like. Though there are some points in the book where it drags a little, that's just my personal finding. I really enjoyed the book and recommend it.

Empathy is impossible. That's why you can cry watching a sad movie then forget about it five minutes later. The imagined feelings don't stick like feelings in real life. What makes this novel different is that forcing empathy/sympathy is not required. All the feelings and thoughts are laid out right in front of you. It's as close as I have ever been to knowing what life is like for another person. And I discovered that the only real differences between human lives are the circumstances.

Read it, you will more than love it.

Quite simply, this is a phenomenal piece of work by an unapologetic author. This memoir is face-first, honest and thrives with a heat that keeps us all moving. With a mere glimpse into the mind of an addict, I was confronted with the realization that we are ALL connected... regardless of the measure of our crimes.
I recommend this book for people who want to read something with real heart and sincerity. This is certainly NOT something for weak-stomachs or light entertainment.

I normally don't have the attention span with everything else going on to sit down and read something, but I picked this up right off of a breakup and it was really good. The author is extremely descriptive and makes everything so vivid and easy to understand that you sympathize with the characters really well. I cannot say enough about this book. It has been compared to Go Ask Alice and I have read that too and I would say this is a lot better. I will be looking out for other things by this author as well, very enjoyable book. Go buy it!

Take a chance on this great little book! I couldn't put it down. It completely pulled me into its crazy and heartrending world.

In spite of its title, this book is exhuberant, clever, and often hilarious. It recounts a torrid young romance from its innocent, puppy-love beginnings to its harrowing ending. Meanwhile, the author describes in witty and feeling detail his descent from halcyon college days into a sordid life of drugs, crime, and finally jail. The author's voice is ever-hopeful in the face of his crumbling existence. His self-aware and amusing perceptions kept me entranced as he recounted his traumatic adventures. Sometimes he gets sidetracked into little subplots and silly stories, but I found these narrative excursions endearing and insightful.

Don't let the title put you off. This book provides a quirky, insightful, and deeply feeling look at contemporary life, love, addiction, and culture.

Another reviewer used the word sophomoric to describe this book - I think that's a pretty apt description.

Maybe I'm just too old for books like this, the market seems to be high school or younger, a dusturbing thought based on the protagonist's shocking lack of self-awareness and eagerness to glorify drug culture.

"Oh but really it's about characters, you know, learning profound life lessons or growing or coming to like each other or overcoming obstacles to succeed in the end," you might say. Oh, all those tired plot devices the author employs with little method or skill? Really this novel seems like the author's thinly veiled attempt to justify himself as an interesting person and to sleep with teenage girls.

While he may succeed in the latter, the former fails in many respects. On his website the author equates himself with Kerouac, Salinger, Palahniuk - take his suggestion and go read one of these authors instead. What do they have that he doesn't? Fresh, interesting voices and the ability to tell a story.

A few select quotes:

"the smell of cat piss is one of the more permanent odors in this vast world of particularly rambunctious odors"

"a long time ago I learned this neat trick about looking into a woman's eyes, a trick that's worked many times successfully"

"we even stopped the car at a rest stop early onto have a quickie that was cheap, tawdry, and wonderful. It started snowing..."

If you want to read about how interesting the author thinks he is (in reality, not very), how fascinating and "out there" his life experiences have been (not really), and basicallly spend 300+ pages reading about a self-absorbed child of the 90s this may be the book for you. But be warned, profound insights such as the above quoted cat piss ramblings are not isolated incidents. Mostly it's like reading a really long product of a night school creative writing seminar that's never been touched by a professional editor.

I was told if I loved Running with scissors by Augusten Burroughs then I will love this one too!! And I love it!! You know why??? Because it's real life drama!!! It left such feelings behind and still have them in my heart that I hope never going to disappear!!!
My heart sank!!! And everytime when I see (also today) 20-22 years old young people having fun I think of the Them!
Thank you, Sam!

This book is OK if you want to read about all the stupid things that someone on drugs does. I just couldn't get in to the book. The writing style was sophomoric and the story just seemed shallow.

At the end, the author has a note that a portion of the proceeds from this book (if any) will go towards spinal research. By adding "if any", I get the impression that he knows that the book isn't that great, but that we'll hopefully feel better about buying the book because we're contributing to spinal research.